Force Bonds
by BrokenMentality
Summary: A closer look into Rey and Kylo Ren's force bonds, and other important Reylo scenes. Reylo. I do not own any of the Star Wars characters or films. Includes scenes from The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker. Rated T for language.
1. Connection

**Connection**

Rey woke to the sun shining on her face through the small window in the stone hut. It was warm and comforting and she smiled as she opened her eyes. She sat up and stretched her arms out as she swung her legs over the edge. Sweeping a hand across her eyes, she blinked and focused on the wall in front of her, when she noticed a strange tug on her conscious and a sudden silencing of the world…

Kylo Ren sat in the medical chair as a droid stitched his healing scar back together. He flinched slightly as the droid worked and as he remembered how he got it in the first place. The scavenger, the girl who had bested him. He was puzzled by her and intrigued. Why did he feel this strange connection to her? Then Kylo froze. He waved the droid away as he felt a shift in the force along with a pull on his mind. As he focused on the wall in front of him, his world suddenly went silent save for his own breathing, and of the girl sitting before him.

Rey drew a sharp intake of breath as she all of a sudden saw Kylo Ren sitting in front of her where the stone wall had been. They locked eyes in confusion and wonder. The only sound Rey could hear was their breathing. She looked into his dark eyes and saw surprise and vulnerability? His usually guarded expression was down and she saw the pain in them. Her own chest tightened at the memory of his crackling red lightsaber piercing Han Solo;'s heart, and sudden anger rose up in her. She grabbed her blaster sitting next to her, aimed and shot.

Kylo flinched violently but stopped short when nothing hit him. Rey was no longer in his sight. Rey stared in shock at the gaping hole in the stone hut. Kylo abruptly stood up and walked out into the hallway. Rey quickly exited the hut and then both turned around to find themselves face to face again. They stared at each other for a long moment before Kylo suddenly reached out his hand.

"You'll bring Luke Skywalker to me," he said, his words echoing slightly. Rey didn't respond and Kylo slowly withdrew his hand. "You're not doing this, the effort would kill you." he mused. He looked over his shoulder and asked, "Can you see my surroundings?"

"You're going to pay for what you did!" Rey spat, cutting him off and glaring at him.

Kylo continued as if he hadn't heard her. "I can't see yours." He paused and looked into her eyes head-on. "Just you." Rey continued to meet his stare. "No," Kylo paused and softly murmured. "This is something else…."

A loud clang startled Rey and she glanced backward as Luke emerged saying, "What's that about?" the words only ringing faintly in her ears.

Kylo noticed her reaction and asked with a somewhat mocking tone, "Luke?"

Rey turned to offer a retort but was only met with small gray creatures grumbling angrily and gesturing at the hole in the stone. She turned around in confusion but only saw Luke with a questioning look on his face. Rey glanced down and quickly answered, "I was cleaning my blaster, it went off."

Luke looked at her for a moment before nodding and said, "Let's get started." as he began to climb the stairs.

"Who were those things?" Rey asked, following him..

"Caretakers," Luke answered. "Island natives. They've kept up the Jedi structures since they were built."

Rey glanced back before continuing and said, "I don't think they like me."

"Can't imagine why," Luke said sarcastically. Rey climbed after him but was still shaken by the strange encounter between her and Kylo Ren…

Kylo immediately felt her absence as sounds came back to the world around him. His gaze was only met by the shiny black panels of the hallway as he turned away with Rey's face embedded in his mind…


	2. Monster

**Monster**

"Still can't reach the Resistance?" Rey asked Chewie. He growled in frustration and shook his head. Rey nodded empathetically. "Keep at it. If you get through can you check their status?" She started to leave but then paused and added, "And ask about Finn?" Chewie grunted that he would and Rey left the cockpit passing a couple of Porgs nestled in the _Falcon's _shelves. She smiled tenderly at the heartwarming sight. Walking down the rampway, Rey could hear the crash of the ocean against the rocks below. It was raining and all Rey could do for a moment was stare in awe. She tentatively reached her hand out from underneath the _Falcon's_ underbelly to have drops of water splatter her hand. She smiled in wonderment, still awed by the seemingly endless abundance of water. On Jakku, water was a treasured scarcity but here, it seemed to be never-ending. She smiled as she felt the ocean spray on her face, but then wrinkled her nose in confusion. She became aware of another sound… machinery?

Kylo Ren stared solemnly through the glass pane and watched the orange sparks fly from the machines. The faint whirring of the drills was rhythmic as he pondered and tried to make sense of his earlier connection to the scavenger. It was strange, and he didn't know what was causing it. He didn't like to be out of control, but what surprised him was that he wasn't angry about this connection. He was definitely curious and intrigued, but oddly, he wasn't upset. Returning his gaze to the glass, he froze and listened to the sound of ocean water hitting rocks. He turned around and lifted his gaze as the world around him suddenly silenced. He stared straight into Rey's hazel eyes. Shock and surprise registered onto her face before turning it into a look of contempt. When he broke the silence, his voice echoed slightly coming before and after at the same time.

"Why is the Force connecting us?" He asked. "You and I?"

"Murderous snake!" Rey seethed, cutting him off. He didn't react in the slightest to her outburst which only made her angrier. "You're too late," she glared at him. "You lost. I found Skywalker!"

He regarded her for a moment with almost a slight look of amusement before asking, "Did he tell you what happened?" Rey looked taken aback for a moment, confused. "The night I destroyed his temple, did he tell you what happened?" Kylo persisted.

Rey cut him off again, her voice full of anger, contempt, and disgust as she said, "I know _everything_ I need to know about you."

"You do?" Kylo asked. Then his tone took on a sarcastic edge. "Ah, you do." She stared at him hard but was finding it difficult not to stare at the angry red scar going down his face. Kylo paused for a moment, staring so intently into her eyes that it made her feel exposed and vulnerable like he could tell what she was thinking. What she was _feeling_. His voice barely above a whisper, he murmured half to himself, "You have that look in your eyes. From the forest." His voice lowered even more. "When you called me a monster."

"You _are _a monster!" Rey spat at him. He took a few steps forward and she tensed slightly even though she knew, in reality, he wasn't actually there with her. As she glared at him, she was surprised to see that his eyes were softer and deeper than she had expected. She was surprised to see so much pain and conflict in his gaze.

He looked at Rey for a moment before responding, "Yes, I am," his voice breaking slightly on the last syllable. Rey and Kylo held each other's gaze, both surprised at his sudden display of vulnerability. Then Kylo disappeared from Rey's sight as the sound of the ocean spray returned to her. She stood there numbly, barely even feeling the water spraying her face.

Kylo now stood facing the black-paneled wall, staring at where Rey had been. He felt something strange and he brought his gloved hand up to wipe his face. He looked down in confusion as he realized that there were drops of water on his glove even though he was nowhere near water at that moment. He took a sharp inhale, shuddering slightly as he clenched his fist tightly. Even though he knew what Rey said was true, that he was a monster, and had even agreed with her, it stung him deeper than he'd like to admit. But why did he, the mighty Kylo Ren, care about what one scavenger girl from nowhere thought? He quickly pushed the question out of his mind and tried to rid the image of Rey's contempt-filled glare from his mind.


	3. Let the Past Die

**Let the Past Die**

Rey stormed away from Luke, fuming after realizing what he said about the Caretakers being "raided" was a joke. She was furious with him for taking a serious matter like that in jest. She walked until she was far away from the village as the sun dipped below the horizon and night began to fall.

"_The legend of Luke Skywalker that you hate so much? _I _believed in it," _Rey remembered what she had said to Luke. "_I was wrong." _She shook slightly in anger and disappointment. She thought Luke would provide answers for her, would help guide her. Then she shuddered again, but not because of her anger. Goosebumps rose on her arm when she felt his all too familiar presence.

"I'd rather not do this now." She said, staring at the ground.

"Yeah, me too" came his reply. She continued staring at the ground for a moment before turning to face him.

"Why did you hate your fath-" she stopped short when she lifted her gaze. Kylo turned to face her, without a shirt on, his bare chest on full display. Rey's eyes widened for a moment as she glanced at his toned muscles and his fair skin glistening with sweat, along with the angry red scar that trailed down from his face to his collarbone. She cleared her throat and quickly looked away, cheeks reddening from embarrassment. Kylo watched her churning expressions in amusement.

Still refusing to look at him directly, Rey said in exasperation, "Do you have something, a cowl or something you could put on?" Kylo ignored her and instead stepped closer, making Rey more flustered. She closed her eyes to avoid looking at him and shook her head in an attempt to clear it. Rey opened her eyes and looked directly at his face, determined to avoid staring at his chest and abs. "Why did you hate your father? Give me an honest answer!" She said forcefully. To her dismay, Kylo only continued to step closer to her.

Continuing with angry tears in her eyes, she shouted, "You had a father who loved you! Who gave a damn about you!" Tears were spilling out onto her cheeks now as she bit back an angry sob.

"I didn't hate him." Kylo's response surprised her.

So she asked, "Then why?" She took a shuddering breath as she tried unsuccessfully to steady her voice.

"Why what?" Kylo responded. She paused, a chill running down her spine. She looked at him as another tear fell from her eyes. He knew full well what she was talking about so she didn't answer. She _couldn't _answer.

"Why what?" He asked again a little more forcefully. "Say it."

She closed her eyes for a moment before painfully saying, "Why did you…" she trailed off as her voice broke. Rey took another shaky breath before continuing. "Why did you kill him?" She gasped as another sob wracked from her body unwillingly. She lifted her tear-filled gaze to his eyes that surprisingly held a faint softness to them. "I don't understand."

"No?" he replied somberly. "Your parents threw you away like garbage."

"They didn't!" Rey protested.

"They did." he continued. "But you can't stop needing them." His gaze bore straight into hers. "It's your greatest weakness. Looking for them everywhere." Rey looked slightly taken aback and began to protest. "In Han Solo," Kylo continued and then his expression soured slightly. "And now in Skywalker." Rey stared at him in despair as she continued to cry. Kylo's expression softened slightly at the sight of her tears. "Did he tell you what happened that night?"

Rey was surprised at the sudden change of subject but quickly composed her self and shot back angrily, "Yes." She glared at him, her anger returning. Kylo studied her face for a moment.

Then he shook his head and said, "No. He had sensed my power. As he senses yours." His voice lowered and he said, "He feared it." His mind was suddenly thrust back into his younger self, into Ben Solo, as the memory took over. He had been asleep when a humming sound woke him. He blinked in confusion and looked over his shoulder to see Luke, his master, his uncle standing over him with a green lightsaber ignited. A determined and fierce look was in Luke's eyes. Ben startled as he stared at his mentor in confusion and fear. Luke raised his lightsaber and Ben panicked, calling his lightsaber to him and igniting it to intercept Luke's blow. He was scared and in desperation, he reached out his hand and collapsed the room on top of his uncle.

Rey stared at him in shock and disbelief. She blinked and shook her head as she said, "Liar." But she saw no sign of deception in his eyes. Only pain and anger. He stepped toward her again, making it so that they were only inches apart.

He stared at her before saying, "Let the past die." His gaze haunted her. "Kill it, if you have to. That's the only way to become what you were meant to be."

The pair locked eyes for a few moments. Rey was surprised that Kylo was no longer bothering to hide his pain from her. She could see it in his eyes, his sorrow, his conflict, his torment as he barely held his composure by a thread. Kylo could see that she didn't want to believe him, but she knew deep down he wasn't lying. Her anger aimed at Skywalker was lessening, but so was her anger towards him. He could see her conflict in her eyes as well.

The two held their gazes for a few seconds longer before the whistling of the wind and the crashing of the waves returned to Rey's ears. She blinked sharply and when she opened her eyes, Kylo was gone. She shuddered as she took in his words. She slowly turned around and her mind drifted to the dark place that she had stumbled upon during her meditation. The dark place that held answers for her. She felt drawn to it as she walked on wobbly legs, wondering if Kylo really had been telling the truth. But she suspected that she already knew the answer deep down inside of her. She pushed her doubt down deeper as she walked down the stone steps.


	4. Answers

**Answers**

Rey followed the faint and eerie whispers until she found what she was looking for. She lept down from the cliff to walk towards the dark hole in the ground, covered in black moss. Distant wails called her name and she knelt at the entrance, leaning forward slightly to get a better look. She saw nothing but darkness and strands of moss blowing in the wind.

Rey strained to get a better view and hearing but quickly lost her balance as an unseen force suddenly pulled her down. She cried out as she fell into the water below. Rey panicked slightly, as she didn't know how to swim. Jakku was a place where water was a scarcity to drink, and being a desert planet open oceans and lakes were never a part of Rey's life. Despite her rising panic, she closed her eyes and let the Force guide her movements as she tried not to inhale water. Her legs kicked upward towards the surface and she broke free, gasping for breath. She grasped the smooth rocks and clung to them for dear life. She pulled herself up, coughing up the water she had inhaled. Panting hard, she took a moment to breathe. Her clothes were soaked through and her brief swim had caused her hair to be untied which now hung loosely around her shoulders. She looked up and stopped short of what she saw.

An impossibly smooth and reflective wall stood before her, with an incredible likeness to a mirror. Rey stepped towards it as if she was instinctively drawn to it. She stood still for a moment, staring back at her reflection, before tentatively lifting her hand to ever so slightly touch the surface…

* * *

Suddenly, Rey was on the other side of the mirror and was confused as she saw several tangible reflections in front of her. She lowered her hand in confusion, each copy mimicking the movement just a split second after the previous. She turned around, so did the copies of herself, one after the other. The slight scuffle of sound she made when she turned echoed in tune with her movements. It was almost like a domino effect. She raised her right hand again palm facing forwards. She looked at it for a moment and then turned her hand the other way. Each replica followed the movement perfectly one after the other. Rey turned her hand again with the same result.

Then she decided to try something new. She snapped her fingers, making it crisp and clear, and sure enough, one snap followed by another and another. She snapped again and it was like a never-ending line of echoing snaps. Her fingers snapped again before she lowered her arm and looked down at it in wonder. She lifted her head again to try to discern an end to this line. She felt a surprising sense of calm as she balled her fist. Rey knew that this didn't go on forever, that there must be an end destination to all of this.

When she found herself face to face with the mirror again, she slowly raised her arm again, fingers outstretched. Her voice, sounding detached and distant, echoed in her ears.

"Let me see them…" Her fingers touched the cold surface of the stone. "My parents…" Her lower lip trembled as she added one last desperate plea, "Please…"

As her fingertips pressed against the wall, she began to see two shadows take form. Two silhouettes seemed to be walking towards her. She held her breath in anticipation. But then as they got closer, the shadows began to merge and Rey realized only one person was walking towards her. It was difficult to discern the details of this person, only that they felt very familiar and strange at the same time. The figure came to stand in front of her almost as if it was examining her, too. It raised its hand to match up with Rey's and Rey scarcely dared to breathe. Light reflected in her hazel eyes which were full of anticipation, fear, and a small sliver of hope. The mirror slowly cleared starting from her fingertips and spreading outwards. Rey turned her face in anticipation but then she took a halting breath.

The only image she saw was… herself. She saw herself, staring back at her with confusion which slowly transitioned into disappointment as the hope slipped from her gaze. Rey shook all over, but it had nothing to do with the cold wind or her wet clothes. She fell to her knees in shock, not knowing what else to do. Tears began to fall down her face but she barely registered them.

She didn't know how long she sat there, or how she climbed back out. Rey didn't remember stepping inside her hut or starting the fire. She numbly peeled off her outer tunic of clothing to dry, and sat down on the stone bench, wrapped in a woolen blanket. Rey's breath shook and she felt her composure crumble. She openly wept, tears streaming down her face mixing in with the residual rainwater. Long, heartbreaking sobs wracked her body as she felt consumed by despair, frustration, sorrow, but most of all, the loneliness. She felt so isolated at that moment. She couldn't think of anyone that could understand what she was going through.

Rey continued to cry but then she felt it again. The low murmur in the Force and the chilling, but now familiar presence. She lifted her tear-filled gaze to see the dark eyes of Kylo Ren staring across from her.

* * *

**I know this isn't technically a Force Bond session, but it's pretty crucial to the next one so I thought I'd include it anyway.


	5. Not Alone

**Not Alone**

They stared at each other with an intensity that rivaled the heat of the fire. Rey's breathing slowed and found that it was in perfect sync with Kylo's. She didn't bother trying to hide her tears, which surprised both of them.

Kylo's heart twinged slightly at the sight of Rey crying. She was soaked through as if she had been caught in a downpour. Her hair had lost her customary three looped buns, with only the top half being tied back as the rest cascaded past her shoulders. He liked it like that. He stopped short when he realized what he was thinking and quickly cleared his mind. He lifted his gaze to meet Rey's. Tears were still streaming down her cheeks as she trembled and shook. To his surprise, she didn't look angry or upset to see him. She looked broken. And in pain. He didn't say anything, as he didn't want to pressure her to do anything. She took a shaky breath and opened her mouth as if she were going to speak. Her lips parted but nothing came out. Her body shook and she tried again.

"I… " she trailed off. Kylo looked at her with soft, dark eyes. She looked into them and saw openness and an invitation. Surprising herself and Kylo, Rey took the offer and began to open up to him. "I've been alone my whole life." Rey stared at her lap for a moment. "So I'm not sure why this is any different," she says bitterly.

"It doesn't mean that it stops hurting." Kylo's voice surprised her. She looked at him and saw understanding and sympathy. Their connection was electric, almost palpable. The flow of thoughts and feelings that flowed between them was almost overwhelming. He saw her countless nights on Jakku, crying herself to sleep. Clinging to the hope that she hadn't been abandoned. She saw him as a child feeling abandoned by his family because they were busy with other things. How much it hurt when he would hear nervous whispers about how he was too powerful. That he was dangerous, a monster. And even now, the aching loneliness persisted. They understood each other.

Without even thinking about it, Rey began recounting the events in the cave. She told him the immense pull to the dark, the panic she felt in the water, her confusion in the mirror. She told him everything. And he just sat there, listening to her. Not pushing her when she hesitated or interrupting her. There were many opportunities to be cruel, but he didn't take any of them. He just listened to her, with understanding and sympathy in his eyes.

"I should have felt trapped or panicked. But I didn't…" Rey said as she spoke of her replicas in the mirror. "This didn't go on forever, I knew it was leading somewhere." She paused for a moment, before saying shakily, "That at the end it would show me what I came to see." Her eyes squeezed shut for a moment as more tears fell from her eyes. "I'd thought I'd find answers here." Her lower lip quivered slightly as she shakily whispered, "I was wrong." She hesitated slightly before continuing but decided to cast away any facade of strength and decided to be honest and vulnerable with him. She somehow knew he wouldn't judge her. "I'd never felt so alone." Another tear streaked down her face.

A beat of silence hung in the air before Kylo's soft voice broke the tension. "You're not alone." Rey lifted her gaze to meet his eyes. She was stricken with the openness and vulnerability in them. And with his sincerity. His voice was gentle and compassionate. His dark eyes gave Rey a sense of comfort, familiarity, and belonging.

She looked at him for a moment before saying, "Neither are you." Kylo was surprised to see that she was being genuine as if she truly cared about him. The bond between them grew in intensity and depth as they stared into each other's eyes as if they saw into each other's soul. Their breathing and heartbeats were synced together as one, impossible to tell the difference between them, almost as if they were one being altogether…

* * *

"Rey?" Luke called as thunder boomed outside. He blinked through the rain and his gaze landed on the stone hut Rey was staying in. It was opposite to where Luke was, but he could see the light from a fire inside. When he felt Leia through the Force, Luke decided that he was done hiding. He needed to tell Rey that he had decided to go with her, to help her. He began walking towards the hut eagerly.

* * *

Rey lifted her head slightly and said, "It isn't too late." Her eyes were almost pleading that Kylo would believe her. That Ben Solo wasn't completely gone. That there was still light in him. Kylo turned his head towards her slightly in surprise. But her gaze was unwavering as he looked into her hazel eyes. Rey exhaled breathily then shocked herself, and Kylo.

Rey slowly began to lift her hand and her slender fingers stretched outwards towards him. Kylo glanced at her hand and blinked in surprise. But she kept reaching her hand out towards him, is if it were a lifeline she was trying to cling to. Kylo pulled off his glove then, feeling exposed with nothing between his skin and the world. He slowly began to reach his hand forwards, too.

Rey trembled as she continued to offer her hand. She wondered if she could actually touch him, or if her fingers would just go through the air. It wasn't like he was actually in the hut with her. But he seemed so real. As if she could touch his hand, his hair, or trace the scar along his jaw.

As his hand drew closer, neither of them broke eye contact with each other, scarcely daring to breathe. His hand was so close to hers, lit in the golden glow of the fire. They weren't even an inch apart. He hesitated for a moment before his fingertips finally found purchase against her's. Rey gasped slightly as she felt a jolt of electricity flow from their touch. Kylo inhaled sharply as well. They stared at each other in awe and wonderment. Rey found herself reaching out more, for more contact with his hand. She gently closed the rest of the distance between them, their palms fitting against each other perfectly. Rey stared at him in shock and her eyes suddenly were bright with hope as another tear ran down her cheek. But not from sorrow or pain. Kylo trembled as well, not remembering the last time he had had skin-to-skin contact with another person without hurting them. He stared at Rey with such an intensity that Rey almost wanted to look away. But she couldn't bear to turn her gaze away from him. Thunder crashed outside but neither of them paid it any attention. Rey inhaled a shuddering breath through parted lips. There was a strange tether between them, slowly pulling them closer together…

* * *

Luke entered the hut and stopped short. He saw Rey sitting across from Kylo Ren. Ben… His nephew, Leia's son. Their hands were clasped together and they were staring into each other's eyes. The way they were looking at each other was stronger and more intimate than the twin suns themselves. Luke felt panic rising in him and he thrust out his hand. "STOP!" He yelled, and the two whipped their heads towards him as the stone hut blew apart with a thunderous crash.


	6. The Truth

**The Truth**

Rey stood up furiously. She turned to Luke and yelled accusingly, "Is it true? Did you try to murder him?"

Luke ignored her and growled, "Leave this island now!"

"Stop," Rey called after him. When he didn't respond, she shouted as loud as she could. "STOP!" Luke stormed away before stumbling forward when Rey's staff struck his back, knocking him to the ground. He looked up to see Rey's angry stare, her staff held threateningly. "Did you do it?" she asked. "Did you create Kylo Ren?" Luke snarled before leaping to his feet and thrusting out his hand. A metal antenna from one of the huts flew into his grasp with a flurry of sparks. He raised it just in time to block Rey's blow. Rey glared at him and Luke met her hard stare head-on.

Rey gave a cry as she swung her staff towards his head. Luke ducked easily. Rey shouted in frustration and swung again. Luke dodged this one, too. Rey's anger was making her movements sloppy and unrefined. She swung wildly again, yelling in frustration when Luke's staff struck her upper back. Rey yelled and struck again with her staff, her movements now swift and fierce. Luke easily parried all of her strikes although he was forced to step back as Rey advanced forward. Rey's next stroke went wide, allowing Luke to seize it from her grasp and toss it aside. Rey's hand shot out as Luke's old lightsaber flew into her hand. She ignited it and held it up, the saber humming with the contact of the rain and the blue light reflecting across her face. Luke stumbled backward and fell, but caught himself with the Force before slowly lowering himself onto the stone steps. Rey lowered the saber and Luke looked up at her to see her angry face glaring down at him. She turned off the saber and opened her mouth.

"Tell me the truth," she demanded as she turned off the lightsaber, the blade hissing as it retracted. Luke's gaze lowered and Rey suddenly saw a broken old man where there was once a proud Jedi master. Luke paused as his eyes gained a faraway look, full of regret.

"I saw darkness…" he said as he was thrust back into the memory. "I'd sensed it building in him." He saw his own face look upon his sleeping nephew. "I had seen it in moments during his training. But then I looked inside…" He winced before continuing, "But it was beyond what I ever imagined." He saw himself reach his hand out and he shuddered as he remembered the crackling of a lightsaber, the cries of pain and the screams of terror. He pulled back, shaking. "Snoke had already turned his heart." His gaze lowered to the lightsaber in his hand. "He would bring destruction and pain and death at the end of everything I love because of what he would become and for the briefest moment of pure instinct I thought I could stop it!" He saw himself ignite his lightsaber. Then his gaze registered shock as he looked at his mechanical hand holding the saber as he realized what he had almost done. "It passed like a fleeting shadow," Luke said somberly. "And I was left with shame." His eyes watered as he looked at his hand in horror. Then he looked up to see Ben, his nephew, Leia's son, staring at him wide-eyed over his shoulder. He looked at the ignited green saber, then at his uncle. He looked terrified, confused, and betrayed. Luke's voice lowered as he said, "And with consequence." He watched himself look at Ben with horror, shame, and regret. His eyes watered as his face twisted with pain and he gave Ben a pleading look. Ben only stared back at him, trembling slightly with fear. His voice shook slightly as he said, "And the last thing I saw were the eyes of a frightened boy whose master had failed him."

Ben in a panic, summoned his lightsaber and ignited it in desperation. His blue blade collided with his uncle's in a spray of sparks. Luke remembered shouting, "Ben, no!" Ben wore an expression of fear and anger as he reached out with his free hand and collapsed the stone walls around them A last scream rang in his mind before Luke was returned to the present. He blinked through the rain before he met Rey's somber gaze.

She paused before saying, "You failed him by thinking his choice was made. It wasn't! There's still conflict in him!" Luke's face saddened as Rey continued. "If he would turn from the dark side that could shift the tide! This could be how we win!" she insisted.

"This is not going to go the way you think!" Luke said forcefully. Rey knelt so that she was at eye level with him.

"It is," she said with certainty. "Just now, when we touched hands, I saw his future. As solid as I'm seeing you!" Luke's expression became one of despondency at her words. "If I go to him, Ben Solo _will _turn." She spoke with such finality that even as Luke began to protest, he already knew there was no changing her mind.

"Rey," he implored. "Don't do this!" Rey looked at him and then stood up. She offered him his lightsaber, eyebrows raised. She waited to see if he would take it if he would accept the challenge he had to face. Luke's eyes closed as he hung his head. Rey looked at him with a stoic expression upon her face. She lowered her arm.

"Then he's our last hope." She then turned and walked away, leaving Luke sitting on the stone steps. The last thing Luke saw was the _Millenium Falcon's_ jump to lightspeed.

* * *

Rey quickly closed the open drawer before making her way to the _Falcon's_ small escape pod. "As soon as I launch, you jump back out of range," she said to Chewie. "Stay there until you get my signal for where to rendezvous." R2-D2 whistled as Rey punched in the coordinates into the keypad. Chewie grunted and handed her her lightsaber. She paused and said to Chewie, "If you see Finn before I do, tell him…" she paused, unsure of what to say. Chewie roared softly and offered to tell him that she was safe that there was no need to worry about her. Rey smiled and said, "Yeah, perfect. Tell him that." Chewie nodded in affirmation. Rey looked at Luke's lightsaber before breathing deeply and lowered herself in the escape pod. Chewie closed the escape pod and secured it into place. Rey lay on her back, clutching the lightsaber to her chest as she inhaled deeply.

The _Falcon _came out of hyperspace just long enough for Rey's pod to eject before just as quickly jumping back to lightspeed. The thrusters fired up and began to move her towards the _Supremecy. _


	7. I'll Help You

**I'll Help You**

Rey's pod slowed as it lowered itself into the belly of the _Supremecy._ She tried to calm her breathing as she felt the pod land with a thud. She was laying on her back, her hands wrapped around Luke's lightsaber. She flinched and squinted her eyes when a bright light filled the pod and steam and vapor roiled around her. Then, she felt _him._ Her eyes moved to her right as she looked up. The haze slowly cleared to reveal Kylo Ren's face staring down at her solemnly. Her breath hitched at the sight of him, her heart suddenly pounding within her chest. He gazed at her in a way that made her body shiver despite herself. Her lips parted as she exhaled. Their eyes locked, their gaze unable to be drawn anywhere else. Even though he seemed calm, she could feel his heart hammering in sync with her own. His dark, ebony hair framed his face and his scar-the one she had given him-showed in stark contrast against his pale skin. He stared at her almost softly, before he seemed to catch himself and moved out of her sight as two stormtroopers took his place. Rey swallowed hard as she saw the pair of binders in one of their hands as it snapped open with a hard click.

* * *

Kylo could sense her presence as soon as the pod from his father's piece of junk entered the _Supremecy._ He moved forward, pushing stormtroopers and officers alike out of his way. He watched the pod land with a loud thud and walked to stand next to it as vapor rolled off its surface. He felt her eyes shift to him as the fog cleared. She was lying on her back, his uncle's lightsaber clutched against her chest. He inhaled sharply as he took her in. No matter how much he tried to deny it, she was stunning. Her hair was let down as it lay across her shoulders and her lips were pink as they parted slightly. Her hazel eyes gazed up at him through her long lashes. Her eyes held his gaze and he returned it with the same level of intensity. He noticed her hazel eyes were flecked with green and gold which only added to her allure. Kylo could feel both his heart and Rey's beating at the same furious pace as the tension between them thickened. He almost smiled at her and his gaze softened before he caught himself, and moved aside. Two stormtroopers replaced him and one of them held binders that snapped open loudly.

The pod opened and the troopers roughly pulled her out. Kylo's jaw clenched as he watched them handle her so coarsely. She climbed out of the pod and stood before him, still holding his uncle's lightsaber. He moved towards her and held open his hand. His eyebrows raised slightly as if offering her a silent challenge to defy him. She surprised him by deftly handing him the lightsaber and her lips curled upwards in a playful smirk as the troopers clapped the binders over her wrists. Kylo regarded the lightsaber in his hand and felt its power and significance of several generations past. He lifted his gaze to look at Rey again. He moved suddenly, and without even realizing it, he placed his hand on the small of her back and moved her forward.

Rey startled slightly as she felt Kylo's gloved hand against her back. His touch was electric. She walked forward with him apprehensively as she heard the heavy clank of the stormtroopers' boots behind her. It reminded her of Finn, she hoped he was alright. They reached the turbolift and with a slight nod of his head, Kylo dismissed the guards and the doors opened with a hiss. She stepped inside, closely followed by Kylo as he moved to stand slightly behind her. The doors slid closed and they began to move up.

Rey stared forwards as the light passed through the patterned walls of the lift. She could feel Kylo behind her, and she could almost hear his chaotic thoughts. Unable to stay silent any longer, she said, "You don't have to do this." She felt Kylo start at her words slightly before she turned her head to look over her shoulder. Loose strands of her chestnut brown hair fell against her cheeks. "I feel the conflict in you, it's tearing you apart."

Kylo kept his gaze on the shiny black panel in front of him. He was afraid of what he'd see if he looked at her. Rey had turned to face him fully now, her back to the door.

"_Ben,_" she said softly. He flinched slightly when he heard his birth name and his eyes lowered to meet hers before he could stop himself. Her gaze was hopeful as she looked up at him. He held his breath in anticipation of what she was going to say. Her lips parted as she inhaled and he couldn't help but stare at her, his eyes taking in her smooth skin, tanned and freckled from Jakku's sun, her shoulder-length hair as a few loose strands curled slightly in front of her ears, and her eyes that held him captive and there was no hope of escape, even if he wanted to.

"Ben, when we touched hands I saw your future. Just the shape of it but solid and clear." Rey's confidence surprised even herself. She looked at him with a hopeful expression. "You will not bow before Snoke!" She took a few steps forwards and before she knew it, the distance between them had shrunken down to mere inches. Her gaze fell to his broad chest, her cheeks reddening slightly as she remembered seeing him shirtless. She looked back up at him, her gaze resting on his lips for the briefest second before moving up to meet his eyes and said, "You'll turn." Rey didn't even think about it as she leaned towards him, reducing the space between them even more so. She whispered softly, "I'll help you." She allowed herself to get lost in his dark eyes, that held so much emotion, pain, and conflict. She whispered again, "I saw it."

Kylo looked down at her with a conflicted expression across his face. She was so close to him he could hardly breathe. Then he spoke softly, his voice low and deep, "I saw something, too." Rey looked startled for a moment as she heard his voice for the first time since she boarded the ship. She looked at him curiously. He continued, his voice soft, "Because of what I saw I know when the moment comes, _you'll_ be the one to turn." She looked at him in surprise. "You'll stand with me." Her gaze was confused as they continued to hold eye contact.

"Rey," he said softly, saying her name for the first time. Rey noticed this too and she shivered slightly, goosebumps running up her arms. He leaned in slightly so close that if either of them moved they would've touched each other. Kylo looked deep into her eyes and said, "Rey, I saw who your parents are."

Rey's eyes widened in shock and she inhaled sharply. She stared at him to see if he was lying, but she saw no lie in his eyes, and between their Bond, she could sense he wasn't lying. Then the realization struck her with the force of a blaster bolt. Kylo's conflict, his internal struggle with his emotions was not just about himself. His thoughts were also about _her._ She took a few steps away from him, almost bumping into the door. The lift slowed and the doors hissed as they slid open. She turned to face the red walls of the throne room as she saw a large figure in gold seated upon the throne. Kylo then moved forward and took her by the elbow gently, but firmly.

"Well done, my good and faithful apprentice. My faith in you is restored." The monstrous, hoarse, and menacing voice echoed throughout the room. Kylo released Rey and knelt on the ground leaving Rey's arm with a tingling sensation where his hand had been. She then straightened and stared at the Supreme Leader Snoke, jaw clenched. An ugly sneer stretched across his scarred and disfigured face as he regarded her. "Young Rey," he rasped as he spread his arms in a mock gesture. "Welcome."


	8. True Intentions

**True Intentions**

Rey's handcuffs snapped open and landed with a loud _clack_ on the floor. She shook out her wrists as she held Snoke's piercing gaze. She could feel Kylo kneeling behind her, and she could sense his unease, his anxiety. Not for himself, but for her? Snoke let out a deep and menacing chuckle.

"Come closer, child," he commanded. Rey stood her ground defiantly and lifted her head with a level of stubbornness that Snoke had not seen before. He smirked at her and regarded her thin, fragile-looking frame. She seemed so weak and helpless, but he could sense her power broiling within her. Her emotions were easily shown across her face and her mind. He saw her enormous potential and thought it was a pity really; she would have been a fine student.

When she continued to stand motionless in defiance, a sly smile widened across his face. "So much strength…" Her immense power was brimming to the surface, and he could tell that she wanted to release her rage and hatred towards him; she was barely restraining her own violent impulses.

"Darkness rises, and light to meet it." He laughed mockingly as he regarded Rey with interest. "I warned my young apprentice that as he grew stronger, his equal in the light would rise."

With barely a flick of his fingers, Luke's lightsaber was ripped from Kylo's grasp and flew into Snoke's hand. He held the weapon lightly but admired its power and craftsmanship. So much history and power carried through multiple generations, but it did not matter now.

"Skywalker, I assumed," he chuckled as he placed the weapon on the armrest beside him with a dismissive gesture. "Wrongly." He looked at Rey again, who was glaring fiercely at him.

"_Closer, _I said." His voice lowered and he swept away Rey's pitiful defenses and slowly pulled her across the throne room to the dais.

Rey tried with all her strength to resist him, willing her body not to move but she was pulled forwards anyway, feeling helpless. She was rendered defenseless, and it reminded her of when she first met Kylo on Takodana, her body paralyzed and unresponsive. She set her jaw defiantly and clenched her fists. She did find that her mouth still worked.

"You underestimate Skywalker," she warned. Her body strained as she tried to counteract his pull. "And Ben Solo." Rey's thoughts immediately went to Kylo behind her. She sensed that deep down, he was worried for her in a way, just as she was for him. She focused on Snoke again, as she added with finality, "And me. It will be your downfall." Snoke raised his eyebrows in mock concern.

"Oh, have you seen something? A weakness in my apprentice? Is that why you came?" He laughed in mockery and Rey's throat tightened. He regarded Rey as one might as if she were just a toy. Amusing, but useless in every other way. Snoke's menacing chuckle filled and echoed throughout the red throne room.

Snoke shook his head in jest and chuckled, "Young fool, it was _I _who bridged your minds." Rey felt as if she had been punched in the gut and all the air fled from her lungs as her face filled with horror. Kylo also looked up for the first time since entering and looked at his master in hurt and confusion. Both of their stomachs dropped as Snoke continued to taunt them. "I stoked Ren's conflicted soul. I knew he was not strong enough to hide it from you."

Rey inhaled shakily and she could feel that Kylo was as unsettled as she was, if not more so. She recoiled at the notion that this, creature, this monster had created the first real connection she had felt with someone in her entire life. And her confidence began to crumble at this new revelation.

"And _you_," he said regarding Rey, "were not wise enough to resist the bait." His disfigured face split into a cruel smirk as he watched Rey's emotions flash across her face. First shock, then horror, then anger, then fear, and yes, hatred. He paid his young apprentice no mind even though Kylo's thoughts and emotions were projected chaotically and desperately, as the Force roiled and churned around him.

Snoke slowly drew Rey closer and lifted a large, shriveled hand to hold up against her face. Rey flinched and tried to recoil from his touch. Despite her fear, she kept her composure and met Snoke's withering stare head-on.

"And now," he growled as Rey's breaths came faster from her desperate efforts to resist him.

"You will give me Skywalker, and then," His cobalt blue eyes flashed with triumph and menace, "I will kill you with the cruelest stroke." Rey continued to struggle as she tried to wrench herself free of his grasp, all the while glaring daggers at him.

"_No,_" she stated defiantly. She would not let herself be manipulated by this monster before her.

"_Yes,_" Snoke growled and he thrust his hand out. Rey felt her body being yanked skyward above the ground and she gasped from the sudden movement. Snoke suspended her above the black panels of the floor and Rey winced in pain as she felt him invade her mind. She struggled in vain and her cries of distress only seemed to amuse Snoke further.

"Now," he said as his eyes closed, "Give, me, _everything_." Rey strained desperately as she fought to keep him at bay. It made Kylo's mind probes seem pitiful and weak, Snoke's were much sharper and painful. Rey cried out as she felt a piercing pain in her temples.

Kylo lifted his eyes to see Rey suspended in the air, crying out in pain and anguish. He felt his chest tighten at the sight of her so helpless. He glanced at his master as if he wanted him to stop, but Snoke paid him no heed as he tortured Rey. Kylo's heart wrenched as he heard Rey cry out again.

"No, no!" Rey whimpered and Kylo had to avert his eyes from her. He couldn't watch this, but nor could he stop it. Her pain and panic were so devastating and overwhelming it bled into his own emotions. He was still shaken by the revelation that Snoke had forged their connection. But he knelt there motionless, even as he heard Rey begin to scream.

Rey felt her temples throb in agony as Snoke's mental probe ripped apart her defenses leaving her thrashing in anguish. Rey tried to resist in vain, but Snoke had already torn her mental shields down and her body shook as her head was forced backward, her hair and robes flying about her. Unable to hold it in any longer, Rey let out a long, gut-wrenching scream and her cries echoed across the throne room.

* * *

Snoke laughed as he released Rey from his hold. She fell to the ground and let out a yelp of pain as her body landed with a crashing thud, her head still throbbing. Her eyes were closed and her face wore a tight grimace of anguish as she lay on the cold ground still writhing from the after-effects of Snoke's invasion.

"Well, well" Snoke chuckled. "I did not expect Skywalker to be so wise! We will give him and the Jedi Order the death he desires." Rey twisted her head towards Snoke as she glared at him angrily, panting hard. Kylo, too, had looked up at his master, partially to keep himself from staring at Rey.

"After the rebels are gone," Snoke said, as if he were taunting her, "we will go to his planet, and obliterate the entire island."

Rey stood furiously and thrust out her hand, calling Luke's lightsaber to her. Snoke almost wanted to laugh at such a trivial demonstration of the Force. The saber flew towards her hand but then suddenly passed her. She twisted around in confusion but then the hilt swung back towards her around Kylo, who simply moved his head slightly to avoid being hit. Rey cried out as the saber struck her in the back of her head, knocking her to the ground. Luke's lightsaber came to a slow halt before resting back on Snoke's armrest.

"Such spunk," Snoke remarked. "Look here now." He dragged Rey across the room to a circular viewpoint which cleared away to show the Resistance transports as they exploded one by one. Rey's eyes widened in horror, and sweat beaded on her forehead as panic began to rise in her as she beheld the sight in front of her.

"The entire Resistance," Snoke taunted, "on those transports." He laughed before saying, "Soon, they will all be gone." His voice lowered as it took on a more menacing tone. "For you, all is lost." Rey whirled around and Snoke reveled in the hatred he saw in her eyes.

Rey thrust out her hand again, but this time Kylo's saber flew off his belt and into her hands instead of Luke's. She grasped the black hilt and ignited it and raised the crackling, fiery blade. Snoke's Praetorian guards immediately drew their weapons, their crimson armor flashing as they moved, but Snoke waved them off dismissively.

"Oh! Still that fiery spit of hope." He said, admiring the girl's stubbornness but amused by her futile acts of defiance. "You have the spirit of a _true_ Jedi!"

Rey let out a ferocious yell and ran towards him furiously, raising the red saber to strike at him. Snoke simply waved his fingers and Rey went flying backward. Rey struggled hopelessly and cried out as she was thrown to the ground. Kylo's lightsaber fell from her grasp and the blade retreated into its sheath. It slid across the floor in front of Kylo and spun in a circle before coming to rest at his feet, perpendicular to his body. Kylo stared at it for a moment before his dark eyes flicked back up to his master.

Snoke's voice rasped softly as it lowered ominously. "And because of that, you must die." Rey yelled and strained against his hold as he brought her to her knees and spun her around to face Kylo.

"Now," Snoke said. "My worthy apprentice, son of darkness, heir apparent to Lord Vader." He knew Kylo craved to hear such praise and validation and was pleased to find that the young man's thoughts had suddenly calmed and were focused and refined.

He looked at him approvingly and said, "Where there was conflict, I now sense resolve. Where there was weakness, strength." Kylo's eyes flicked down to meet Rey's as her angry expression slowly melted away into something else as she looked at him. Snoke continued and said, "Complete your training, and fulfill your destiny!"

Kylo hesitated slightly before picking up his lightsaber and standing. He looked down at Rey, his face emotionless.

"I know what I have to do." His voice was low and steady, his gaze unwavering. Rey looked up at him and her eyes became pleading. Her chest rose and fell as she panted heavily.

"_Ben_," she pleaded desperately as she looked into his eyes. They carried so much depth but she didn't understand the look he was giving her.

Snoke laughed loudly behind her. "You think you can turn him? Pathetic child," he mocked. "I cannot be betrayed, I cannot be beaten. I see his mind. I see his every intent!" Snoke closed his eyes as he felt that this was better demonstrated and dramatized through the Force. "Yes, I see him turning the lightsaber to strike true!"

Kylo lifted his lightsaber to point towards Rey's chest, but unbeknownst to Snoke, his free hand also twisted ever so slightly, the movement barely perceptible. The Skywalker lightsaber rotated slowly and silently on the armrest.

Snoke continued and growled, "And now, foolish child. He ignites it. And _kills _his true enemy!"

Kylo's hand stilled as he met Rey's pleading gaze, and then with a sudden flick of his fingers, the lightsaber ignited.

Snoke suddenly went rigid as he gasped. Rey was released from his hold almost instantly as she fell to the ground. She looked back towards Snoke in confusion. Snoke slowly looked down at himself to see the Skywalker lightsaber impaling his body in shock.

With another flick of Kylo's fingers, the blue blade carved his master in half. The saber came flying across the room, right into Rey's grasp. She pulled herself up to a standing position as she faced Kylo in shock, barely registering the thud of Snoke's torso falling to the ground. She gazed at him with gratitude, shock, and elation. He stared back at her with the same intensity as he ignited his own saber, the red light reflecting onto his face. They held each other's gaze for a moment longer, before taking a deep breath in sync, before turning back to back to face the red Praetorian guards together.


	9. Stronger Together

**Stronger Together**

It all happened so fast, Rey could barely keep up with what was happening. She and Kylo had spun around, back to back, as half of the 8 Praetorian guards rushed Rey, while the others advanced towards Kylo. Her saber was humming in her hands in anticipation, and she could hear Kylo's saber spitting and crackling. She could feel his adrenaline rush from the oncoming fight, and her own thrill coupled with his.

The red faceplates of Praetorian guards shone brightly in the presence of their weapons which hummed with electricity and power. A silent signal passed through their Bond before they swung their sabers with full force.

Rey swung Luke's lightsaber to block a strike from one of the guard's vibro-voulge, a long staff with a blade on the end. She expected the lightsaber to cleave the weapon in two, but her arm came to a jarring halt and painful vibrations jolted through her arm. She realized their weapons had an ultrasonic generator with a plasma filament, allowing them to deflect their lightsabers. She quickly shoved the guard away and felt the next guard approaching before she saw him. She reached out to the Force to support her attacks.

Kylo brought his crackling saber down on one guard with such an intense ferocity that the guards shrank back for a moment. His saber met one of the guard's vibro-voulge, similar to a staff with an energized blade. They collided with a resounding _thud _and a flurry of sparks burst into the air. He shoved his saber upwards to throw the guards away from him. He felt a ripple in the Force and ducked just before the blade of one of the guard's electro-bisento staff swept through the space his head had been. He straightened and spun his saber to block the other guard coming from his left. He could hear Rey as she battled the other guards. He slammed his saber into the ground, and sparks flew as he slashed upward towards the guard.

Rey slashed her blade to deflect the weapons coming towards her. She was shouting from the effort. She went low and spun her saber on the ground, forcing the guards to back away. She turned to look behind her to see a guard advancing towards Kylo while he was occupied with another. She quickly stabbed the guard in the chest, her lightsaber cutting through his armor. She yanked her saber free and turned to face the three guards that were rushing her all at once, weapons raised. With barely a glance, she brought her saber up to block the oncoming blows and simultaneously reached behind her. She grabbed hold of Kylo's thigh and turned to meet her attackers. As he slashed downwards to deliver a killing blow, she leaned against his back as his momentum helped her kick the three guards away.

* * *

Eventually, Kylo and Rey got separated as the battle moved them in different directions. Kylo threw his elbow back to strike one of the guards in the face and then grabbed the back of his neck and threw him forwards as he kicked another guard. He grunted from effort as he turned behind him. His face was sweaty and his eyes quickly scanned the room until they landed on Rey.

Two of the guards rushed Rey, one wielded a dual vibro-abrir bladed staff, and the other wielded a Bilari electro-chain whip. The guard swung it towards her as she deflected a stroke from the other. Rey nimbly danced away to avoid the weapon and turned to see the other red-armored guard raise his staff over his head, leaving his torso exposed. With a shout, she brought her saber down viciously across his chest and the body fell limply to the ground.

She turned to face the remaining guard but the whip caught her saber and she couldn't yank it free. The guard slowly pulled her forwards as Rey struggled to free her blade. Sparks flew between them, the blue blade contrasting sharply with the red hue of the whip. Rey yelled as the guard grabbed her throat and forced the deadly blade closer to her neck. Rey strained against his grasp, but then realizing that she couldn't pull her saber free, she slipped under his arm and twisted her saber and delivered an upwards blow that split the guard's armor. Fiery, angry, yellow sparks flew as she yanked her saber free and with it threw the whip towards the wall. It exploded against the wall and burst into flames, right above another guard's head. Rey stared at him defiantly. The guard stood and then split his dual vibro-abrir blades in two to wield them like daggers. Rey spun her saber and roared fiercely as she went to meet his challenge.

Two of the guards' electro-bistentos struck Kylo's lightsaber, crossing each other and locking them in place. Kylo forced his saber down and rotated the hilt so that the blades struck his cross blades and not his hand. They forced him backward before he gave an angry shout and forced his saber upwards causing the guards to stumble backward and stabbed the one that had been coming towards him through the chest, the blade crackling and hissing. He shoved the body off the blade and it fell into a pit. Bolts of electricity came from it and red shards of the guard's armor exploded from the entrance.

He held his saber in front of him, his arm was rigid as he watched the remaining guards slowly circling him, weapons ready. Strands of his black hair fell into his face and stuck to the sweat on his forehead. He eyed the guards circling him as they slowly advanced towards him. A cry caught his attention and he turned to see Rey battling the other guard. She blocked one of the guard's blades, but the other one clipped her in the arm and she cried out in pain as the hot blade cut into her skin. The sight of that only angered Kylo more and when he heard the guard behind him activate his whip, his face become one of determination. He spun around to meet that guard's attack and twisted his blade to the side to meet another's. Whilst keeping one at bay, he brought his saber down on another guard's weapon, his saber hitting the ground in a burst of sparks. Kylo grabbed one of the guard's staff and dipped underneath it to behead the guard behind him. He turned around, shouting aggressively to face the other two guards.

A great deal of the room was on fire right now and it was becoming unbearably hot. Rey brought her saber up to meet her adversary's blade but the guard kicked her in the stomach. Rey fell to the ground with a grunt of pain, and narrowly missed hitting her face on the ground. Her arm burned from the blow she'd received earlier but she quickly got to her feet and shouted as she swung her saber.

Kylo dodged a piece of burning metal as it passed by. He cut down the guard in front of him viciously and grabbed the electro-bisento from his hand. He swung it simultaneously with his lightsaber as he engaged the guard behind him. In a flurry of blows, almost too quick to follow, he shoved the guard to the ground and swung his saber to cut into the guard behind him and then stabbed him in the back with the electro-bisento. He shoved the body down with his lightsaber with a shout.

He looked up and was forced to drop his lightsaber. He leaned backward quickly to avoid the blade of the remaining guard. He quickly moved away and dodged a second blow. He grappled with the guard for a moment trying to yank the vibro-voulge from him before the guard spun and suddenly Kylo was pinned underneath the weapon. He desperately grasped the weapon in an attempt to dislodge it from the guard's grasp, but the guard's grip only tightened as he brought the weapon closer to his throat and forced Kylo down to his knees.

Rey was also in a similar situation. The guard had pinned her arm and was forcing his blade closer and closer to her face. Rey shouted defiantly as she desperately tried to free herself. Kylo's eyes flitted to the side to see Rey trapped and struggling. His stomach dropped and he tried harder to dislodge the staff against his throat.

Rey knew that the guard was stronger than her, so she couldn't win this by brute strength. She glared at the guard but then glanced at her lightsaber. Trusting the Force and her instinct, she did something completely unexpected. She let go of her lightsaber. The guard loosened his grasp in surprise, allowing Rey to drop down to catch her saber mid-fall with her other hand. With a shout, she cut through the guard's legs and then stood to deliver the killing blow to his neck. His body fell to the ground and she turned around triumphantly. Then her eyes widened and she panicked when she saw Kylo struggling with the last guard.

"BEN!" she shouted. She switched off her lightsaber and threw it towards him with all of her strength. The saber flew directly into Kylo's hand and he ignited the Skywalker lightsaber and just as quickly switched it off. He paused for a moment, the guard's grip on his neck loosening. He lowered his hand to reveal a smoking hole through the guard's helmet. As the body fell to the floor, Kylo freed himself from his grasp and stood, tossing the guard's weapon to the side. His eyes never left Rey the entire time. Their gazes locked and they both seemed to exhale in relief. Rey's eyes were filled with happiness as she looked at Kylo. Their relief was short-lived though, as the throne room burned around them.


	10. Please

**Please**

Rey felt a rush of happiness and relief. He had turned, for her. He had killed Snoke and fought at her side. Both of their faces were covered in sweat from the fight and the heat, and they were both panting heavily in sync with each other, trying to regain their breath. Rey stared at him for a long time, just taking in the moment. She watched how the glow of the flames reflected across his face, his long dark hair that fell messily into his eyes, and his dark and alluring eyes that held her captive even now. Then all of a sudden, a jolt went through her and she suddenly came back to reality.

"The fleet!" she exclaimed. She ran towards the viewpoint and pointed towards the dwindling Resistance fleet. "Order them to stop firing! There's still time to save the fleet!" She spun around to face him, excitement and hope on her face. But Ben wasn't looking at her anymore. He was looking at his master's body as he stood before the throne. She could hear the muffled thuds as the cannons continued firing, and Kylo's footsteps as they echoed throughout the room. He was breathing heavily and his hands were shaking.

Rey suddenly had a bad feeling about this. The smile slipped from her face and her heart sank as she looked at Kylo. She suddenly felt very afraid.

"Ben?" she asked quietly, her voice cutting through the silence. Her arms lowered and her body stilled. She began to feel a horrible numbness creep into her bones.

Kylo inhaled shakily before he managed to speak.

"It's time to let old things die," he said, his voice hoarse and low. He turned to face her. "Snoke, Skywalker, the Sith, the Jedi, the rebels, let it all die." He took a few steps towards her, his gaze was piercing. He inhaled deeply and when he spoke again, Rey's stomach dropped.

"Rey," he said, before lifting his arm and holding out his hand to her. "I want you to join me."

Rey felt scared, sorrowful, disappointed, angry, and desperate all at once. A thousand other emotions that she couldn't possibly name tore through her. Her eyes filled with tears as she slowly comprehended what he was saying.

"We can rule together and bring order to the galaxy," he said, but Rey barely registered the words. They had been said before by so many others, and she was scared to lose him.

"Don't do this, Ben," she pleaded. "Please don't go this way." Her voice broke and she shook her head pleadingly. Her eyes filled with tears and her lower lip shook slightly. She was silently begging him not to do this. She didn't want to lose him to the Dark side. Hell, she didn't want to lose him, period.

Kylo's face became angry as he said, "No, no. You're still holding on!" His voice had risen to a shout. "Let go!" But then his face softened and his voice quieted. He looked at her in a way that no one ever had before, and it made her heart skip a beat, as it broke at the same time.

"Do you want to know the truth about your parents?" he asked. "Or have you always known?"

Despite all of Rey's efforts to keep her emotions at bay, a single tear fell from her eyes onto her cheeks. She didn't want to break down, not now, not here.

Kylo took a few more steps towards her as he continued. "Or have you just hidden it away?" He looked at her with an emotion she couldn't place. "You know the truth. Say it." Rey stood still, not wanting to accept this.

At the sight of her tears, Kylo's voice softened.

"Say it," he repeated gently.

Rey looked down as another tear fell from her eyes. Her voice shook as she spoke.

"They were nobody," she said tearfully as she lifted her eyes to meet his gaze again.

"They were filthy junk traders," he said almost nonchalantly. "Who sold you off for drinking money." Rey didn't want to believe him, but she knew that he was telling the truth. He had never lied to her before, and deep down, some part of her had already known. Rey sniffled and tried to choke back her sobs.

"They're dead in a pauper's grave in the Jakku desert." More tears dripped down her cheeks as Kylo continued.

"You have no place in this story. You come from nothing. You're nothing," he said solemnly. Rey could no longer hold his gaze as her eyes filled with more tears, blurring her vision. She blinked hard and tried to force down a sob that threatened to rise from her throat. She focused on the red armor of one of the fallen guards, the pieces of metal that were still burning, the smell of ozone in the air, anything but Kylo. Couldn't he tell that this was hurting her? That she just wanted him to stop? Or was she more upset with herself for being in denial for so long? She inhaled shakily, still avoiding Kylo's gaze.

Kylo's expression softened and then he spoke again, his voice soft. "But not to me." She looked up at him in surprise, confusion, and longing? She meant something to him, even though she came from nothing. She suddenly realized that he didn't care about her origins or her past. He wanted her, here, now. And despite all of the opposing circumstances, she had come to care for him, as he had come to care for her. After feeling alone for all those years, someone was finally asking her to be part of something. To mean something to someone. Her gaze met his and she realized at how vulnerable he was being right now. He was honest and sincere about this. He genuinely wanted her with him. To not be alone anymore.

Rey saw a muscle in Kylo's jaw clench nervously as he asked again, "Join me." He offered her his hand again, and it did not escape Rey that his hand was trembling. He took another step closer to her. When Rey looked at his hand, she felt a flood of emotions wash over her. Confusion, hope, fear, and longing. She didn't want to rule the galaxy. She just wanted him. She didn't know exactly what that meant but at that moment, she did want to take his hand.

Kylo took another step forward, so he was only a pace away from her. His hand was still outstretched to her. Rey looked at him with an expression that held so much emotion within it as if she was begging him to know what she wanted. She looked back up at Kylo to meet his dark eyes. To her surprise, they were scared, vulnerable, and pleading, a gaze that mirrored her own. Kylo continued to hold out his hand and looked at her pleadingly.

"Please," he whispered, his chin trembling. Her heart broke at that simple request. She wanted to take his hand so badly because she didn't want to be alone anymore. Nobody in her life understood her as well as he did. Not Luke, the Resistance, or even Finn. She felt as if her heart was breaking more and more with each passing moment.

Kylo looked into her hazel eyes, and he could see the desire and conflict in there. He desperately prayed that she'd accept. He was terrified, rooted to the spot, unable to look anywhere else. He had been so honest with her, so vulnerable, and even if she didn't know it, she held his heart in her hands. He inhaled shakily, trying not to let his emotions overwhelm him. He didn't even necessarily want her by his side for her power, and where she came from didn't matter. What did matter, is that she understood him and was his equal in almost every way. The loneliness that had tortured him since he was a child vanished when he was with her. Over the past couple of days, he had grown to truly care for her. Snoke was right. He did have compassion for the girl standing before him. She almost looked angelic with the glow of the orange sparks falling all around them reflecting off her face. The sparks fell around them like snow, and he thought of when they had fought in the forest only days ago. He kept his hand outstretched to her, and to hell with his pride. He softly whispered one simple word, "Please." His gaze never left her as her eyes flitted back and forth between him and his outstretched hand. He waited apprehensively, as the muffled boom of the explosions behind them raged.

* * *

They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity. Rey felt more tears roll down her cheeks and without even realizing it, she was slowly raising her hand. She felt torn apart at that moment. The urge to just take his hand was so strong as if she was being pulled to him like a magnet. She had gotten to see glimpses of the man she had come to see, Ben Solo, underneath the mask of Kylo Ren. But Ben was being swallowed by darkness again, and her heart broke when she realized that.

Kylo kept his hand outstretched. Her fingers were so close to his. They were barely more than two feet apart. Her expression of turmoil and conflict suddenly became one of resolve. She slowly raised her hand towards him. Her hand was shaking and when he looked into her eyes, he saw longing, sorrow, and regret. Before Kylo could comprehend what that meant, suddenly his uncle's lightsaber was yanked from his hand as she pulled it to her with the Force. He flung up his own hand quickly to stop it mid-flight.

Rey reached for the lightsaber but strained when it stopped in mid-air as Kylo pulled it towards him. She increased her concentration, but he matched her at every move. Rey wanted to be free of this turmoil and chaos, but she had already made her choice, even though it tore her apart on the inside. The saber began to shake and tremble, wavering back and forth between the two.

Kylo had flung up his hand to desperately stop her from reaching the lightsaber because somehow he knew that if she did reclaim it, he wouldn't be able to fight her. He couldn't at this point. If she wasn't with him, what did that mean? He didn't even know if they were enemies again, but he couldn't focus on that right now. He channeled every ounce of power he had left in him to pull his uncle's lightsaber towards him.

As more time passed by, both of their pulls became more powerful. It was so much that they slid further away from the saber as they grappled against each others' Force. Rey let out a scream as she strained from the effort and Kylo let out a yell of his own.

The saber hummed and shook violently. Then suddenly, it could no longer take the conflict. In a massive explosion of light, the saber split in two, releasing an immense wave of power. And at that same moment, the _Supremecy _shook violently, as the Resistance ship rammed into it at lightspeed, tearing it apart. Lightsaber and ship broke simultaneously as the blast threw both Rey and Kylo backward, knocking them unconscious as thunderous explosions rocked the room.

* * *

**Author's Note: Haha, two updates in a row. Sorry, this quarantine gives me a lot of time to procrastinate but sometimes my creative energy comes in bursts. Ahh, this scene gives me so many feels. Question: do you want me to include the Force bond sessions in The Rise of Skywalker as well? Feedback and reviews are always appreciated!**


	11. Aftermath

**Aftermath**

A dull ringing caused Rey to slowly come back to consciousness. She tried to open her eyes but winced when she was blinded by the bright lights. Her ears were ringing as she slowly opened her eyes. The floor beneath her was black, and there was fire everywhere. It took a moment to realize where she was, and what had happened. She sat up and looked around the throne room. There was fire everywhere, she could see the tiny Resistance transports moving away, unhindered. The _Supremacy _was highly unstable and Rey realized that the ship had been split in two. She stared for a moment, dumbfounded, before shaking her head in an attempt to clear it.

Rey tried to stand on wobbling legs, but the collapsed beneath her and she fell to the ground again. She tried again, and this time managed to stand. Her wounded arm caught her gaze as she twisted her arm to inspect it. The cut was oddly shaped, two lines that almost formed a straight line. Her heart twisted with pain as she realized that the shape mimicked two hands reaching for each other.

Rey searched for the pieces of Luke's lightsaber. The last thing she remembered was the explosion from the saber breaking in two. She picked up the jagged pieces, the hilt was broken, and the kyber crystal inside had sheared apart.

Her gaze was solemn before she turned around. Her eyes scanned the room until she found him. Kylo was lying on the floor a little bit away from where she was. His chest was moving up and down and she let out a sigh of relief that he was still alive. She searched the room again before she found the black hilt of his lightsaber, lying beside one of the guards. Her hand shook as she picked it up. She walked towards him, pausing a pace length's before him. A sudden realization struck her, he was at her mercy right now. She could easily ignite his saber and end his life. How much suffering would be avoided? As soon as the thought entered her mind, she cast it aside. She couldn't do it. She wouldn't do it. That would be making the same mistake as Luke had all those years ago. And even though it was difficult, she admitted to herself that she did care about him. Even if she could, his life was not hers to take.

So she kelt down beside him and gently clipped the saber back to his belt so he would appear blameless. She moved her gaze to his face. It was one of those rare times where he didn't look conflicted and pained. He looked at peace. Rey felt her eyes filling with tears and she quickly tried to wipe them away. Despite her efforts, one of them still fell from her eyes and it landed on Kylo's cheek. She froze for a moment, but he didn't move. Her hand reached out and gingerly touched his jaw, tracing the scar that she had given him. Had it only been days ago? She couldn't remember anymore. She gently brushed a lock of his dark hair out of his face. Her heart was breaking. If she left, they would both be alone again. They would be enemies again. Her lip trembled, and she buried her face in her hands, allowing tears to fall one more time. But when she removed her hands, nothing had changed.

"I'm sorry, Ben," she whispered gently. "I'm so sorry." Her hand moved on its own accord to push another piece of hair out of his face. It was so soft, even amidst the ruined throne room. Rey hesitated for a few seconds before she leaned down and ever so slightly brushed her lips against his forehead. It was her way of saying goodbye, an apology for leaving him.

She stood and took in a deep shuddering breath. If nearly 20 years on Jakku had taught her anything, it was patience. There were 2 things that Rey was best at: fixing broken things and waiting. She refused to give up hope that somewhere in this broken vessel of Kylo Ren, Ben Solo was still alive. So she would wait. As long as it took. She recognized that she couldn't force him to the light, no matter how much she wanted to. There were some things that Rey couldn't do for him. It was up to Ben to decide what his destiny would be. She desperately hoped that she hadn't lost him.

Gathering the two broken pieces of Luke's lightsaber, she took one last look at Kylo. Her heart was breaking on the inside, and she ran towards the exit because she knew she wouldn't be able to leave if she stayed any longer.

She made her way to the burning hanger and jumped into the hearest ship. As she prepped the ship and started the engines, she took one last look at the _Supremacy _before she launched the ship and sped out to space. Rey quickly sent a message to Chewie on where to rendezvous. Her back slumped against her seat and she looked down at her hands. They were shaking violently, so she clenched them into fists to still them, her nails digging into her palm so she didn't have to think about what had just happened.

* * *

Kylo startled awake, and his vision slowly cleared to see a pair of boots in front of him. He looked up at General Hux's sneer as he looked at him in mock concern.

"What happened?" Hux said, seeming to barely maintain his composure. Kylo's muscles burned as he stood. He realized that Rey must have recovered first. He noticed his lightsaber had been clipped back to his belt, too. He had been at her mercy, and she could've easily killed him. Why didn't she? And she put his saber back, too so it wouldn't look like he had mutinied. It was almost as if she cared about him. He cast that thought aside, for now, his anger returning. Hux was still standing there, his pasty face even paler than normal.

"The girl murdered Snoke," Kylo said. He stood and looked around the room. It was even more ruined than before. He walked towards the window to see half of the _Supremecy_ detached and on fire. "What happened?" he asked.

"She took Snoke's escape craft." Hux barely managed to keep the contempt out of his voice. Kylo stood at the window and looked at the tiny pinpricks of light that showed the Resistance transports.

"We know where she's going. Get all of our forces down to that Resistance base." He turned around and pushed past Hux. "Let's finish this."

"Finish this?" Hux was incredulous. "Who do you think you're talking to?" His voice was angry as he started to shout. You presume to command _my _army? Our Supreme Leader is dead! We have no ruler-" He was cut off when a low rumble shook the whole room. He felt his windpipe begin to close. His hands grasped at his throat in vain, and he struggled for breath as he began to choke.

Kylo turned around, his hand held out menacingly as he commanded the Force to crush Hux's windpipe. A spray of yellow sparks exploded behind him.

"The Supreme Leader," he all but growled, "is dead!" He twisted his hand as he tightened his grasp on Hux's throat. Hux was on his knees now.

Hux looked at Kylo with utter contempt and hatred as he forced out, "Long live the Supreme Leader."

Releasing his hold on the red-headed general, Kylo stalked towards the turbolift. The door still worked as they shut with a hiss and it began to move down. Kylo allowed himself a moment of reprieve. He slumped against the wall as he panted heavily. He allowed his mind to wander to the events in the throne room. He thought he had felt the lightest of touches to his face and he thought he faintly heard Rey's voice. _I'm sorry, Ben._ He closed his eyes tightly and clenched his fists.


	12. Alone Together

**Alone Together**

Kylo Ren and his forces stormed through the broken door of the Resistance base. He was fuming at how easily he had fallen for his uncle's trick. He ordered the troopers to search the base, even though he could already sense that the Resistance was not here. Hux stood at a distance and watched as Ren entered the command room. His face showed utter disdain and hatred. His pale cheeks were hollowed out and there was a dark, blotchy, purple bruise on the side of his face when Ren had thrown him against the interior of the walker. He knew Ren was not a competent leader, and that his emotional distractions would run the First Order into the ground. Hux would not let this happen.

Kylo walked into the empty command room, his cloak billowing around him. His mother had been here, and she still held no hatred for him. But there wasn't any hope either. A strange glint caught his eye so he knelt down to inspect it. He picked the small object up and his chest tightened painfully. His father's dice. He flinched as he remembered his blade piercing through his father's torso, his eyes shocked, but forgiving. Watching the sunlight reflect on the gold of the dice, he realized that his father always kept these hanging over the dashboard of the _Millenium Falcon_. How were they here? Then he felt it again. A low rumble in the Force that shot through him as he felt the vibrations in his body, and mind. He looked up and his breath hitched as he stared up in shock.

* * *

Rey was loading the last of the Resistance fighters aboard the _Falcon _as Chewie started the launch process. The blue of the engines reflected onto the glistening white snow. Also something she had never seen before. She was still reeling from feeling Luke's death and trying to process it all. She helped the last Resistance fighter up the ramp who gave her a smile and thanked her. Rey smiled back and turned to lift the ramp up again. She turned around, arm raised when she stopped suddenly when she felt a sudden, yet familiar shift in the Force. Her hair grazed her shoulders as she turned her head. She looked down the ramp and suddenly felt as if she had forgotten how to breathe. She was looking into the dark eyes of Kylo Ren.

The Force had decided to connect them once again, muffling the rest of the world, as if Rey and Kylo were the only two beings in the galaxy at that moment. They were both confused for a moment. Snoke had said that he had forged their Bond, but here they were. Had Snoke merely initiated it? Had the connection between them been real after all?

Kylo's lips parted in surprise as he stared at Rey. She was equally stunned, her chest rose and fell as she breathed heavily. The hand that had been about to close the door remained in the air and he noticed that it was trembling. He felt so many emotions flow between them to the point where he couldn't tell if they were Rey's or his. He felt surprised, and relieved, which only served to confuse him more. He wanted to reach out to her, to say something, but he felt like he could no longer speak. His eyes never left hers, and within them, he was asking a silent question. _Why? _

He saw several emotions fly across her face before her jaw set. He thought he saw a glimpse of relief that she had felt when seeing him, but he wasn't sure. There was no longer any hatred in her eyes, but they were disappointed, melancholy, and even a bit of conflicting anger. Then he felt the smallest glimpse of, hope? His breath shook when he realized that she still had a sliver of hope for him.

Rey looked into his dark eyes, unable to look anywhere else. She was confused, as she thought that the Bond would've died with Snoke. But even more confusing was that the first thing that she felt after the shock subsided was a rush of relief. He looked so lost, so broken. She tried to steel herself, to be strong. She wanted to say something, anything but her voice refused to work. A rush of anger came over her as she wondered why didn't he just come with her? Away from the Dark side? But she began to understand it wasn't that simple for him. And she was angrier at the horrible circumstances they were in that kept them apart.

His eyes seemed to be asking her a silent question before she heard the word ring inside her mind. _Why?_ Had she really heard his voice? Testing if it went both ways, she sent her own message to him. _You know I can't. _Judging by the startled look on his face, he had heard her message. His adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed.

His gaze never left her hazel eyes as he sent his voice into her mind again. _If you had taken my hand, we wouldn't be alone anymore. _Rey flinched slightly. Her expression became stoic and her hand lowered to the panel as she pushed the button to close the ramp. She sent one last message as the ramp closed.

_I know. _The ramp shut closed as she severed their connection. Kylo flinched visibly as his father's ship cut him off from Rey. He stared at where she had been. He was only met with the stone wall of the base. His eyes went to his father's dice. They slowly disappeared leaving his hands empty. He clenched his gloved hand into a fist. He had won. He had killed his uncle, the majority of the Resistance was gone, and he had become Supreme Leader. This was a victory for the First Order. But then why did it feel like he had lost? Kylo's head hung as he stared at the ground, with Rey's final expression burned into his mind.

* * *

Rey's hand shook after she had closed the ramp. It shut with a resounding _thud _and she was breathing shakily. Kylo's last expression had seemed so broken, so lost. His last message rang in her head. _If you had taken my hand, we wouldn't be alone anymore. _It was like a blow to her stomach and all the air had left her lungs. She had desperately shoved her churning emotions down so they wouldn't show on her face. If they did, it would have been that much harder to force that last thought at him.

_I know. _That simple declaration seemed to break him, and it broke her, too. Only after the ramp had closed did Rey allow herself a moment of privacy. She squeezed her eyes shut to prevent tears from rolling down her cheeks as she swallowed hard. Taking one last glance at the door, she turned around and went to join the rest of the Resistance. But all she could see was Kylo's broken expression just before she had severed their connection.

* * *

***Author's Note: Ugh this scene breaks my heart watching their faces. What are your thoughts on me including Force Bond sessions between The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker? It wouldn't technically be canon because Pasaana was apparently the first session since this one. But if people are interested I would be happy to include some! Also, try listening to Imagine Dragons' song "I Bet My Life," and try not to cry while thinking of the Reylo arc in the Last Jedi. *sobs.**


	13. Outburst

**Outburst**

Rey sat in one of the _Falcon's _sleeping quarters. She had a rare moment of privacy without anyone else intruding. She loved her friends of course, and Leia was a wonderful mentor and she felt like the mother Rey had never had. She was glad Finn was ok and was quickly becoming fast friends with the pilot that he had helped rescue, Poe. They were surprisingly similar which caused them to argue at times, but they were still good friends. She also talked to Rose at times, the girl that Finn had been taking care of. Rose was very friendly and welcoming, even though she was recovering from some serious injuries. The Resistance welcomed her with open arms and she had multiple friends who were supportive and kind. Finn, Poe, Rose, Chewie, Leia, and even the droids, BB-8, R2-D2, and C3PO. But she still felt as if something was out of place. It had only been a few weeks since Crait, but the Resistance was still recovering. While Rey wasn't wounded physically, besides the cut on her arm, she was holding a lot of pain inside. She did her best to hide it, smiling and helping others as best as she could. But now she was alone. Her hand moved slightly and the door of the room slid shut with the help of the Force.

When the door shut, she allowed herself to drop her mask of optimism. She slumped against the wall as she sat on the small bed. She kicked her boots off and drew her knees up to her chest. Her expression became one of exhaustion and sadness. She groaned slightly and she rested her head on her knees. She inhaled sharply and winced in pain as she moved her arm. Her cut hadn't healed yet. Her calloused fingertips carefully traced the shape of it on her arm. Her heart twinged as she saw how it was shaped. It wasn't one continuous line and it looked as if it had been broken in two. It looked like two hands reaching for each other, but they were separated by just a sliver of space. It wasn't much, but it was enough.

She bit her lip and before she could stop herself, her mind wandered to the events on the _Supremecy. _Kylo, Ben, she didn't even know at this point. She was so confused.

Shortly after boarding the _Falcon_, she found herself alone with Leia, Luke's sister. She was so like him, but so different at the same time. Leadership came so easily to her, whereas with Luke she sensed that he was more uncomfortable with it, or it wasn't as natural to him. Leia carried herself with a regal, but kind presence. She had come over and had sat next to Rey when she saw her brother's broken lightsaber in her hands. Rey had looked up in surprise, she didn't know Leia very well, but at the same time felt weirdly close to her. Leia had kindly put her hand over Rey's to still her trembling fingers. She remembered speaking softly to her.

"Luke is gone. I felt it. But it wasn't sadness or pain. It was," she had paused to search for the right words. "Peace and purpose." she finished. Leia nodded and smiled sadly.

"I felt it, too."

Rey remembered opening up to the woman, and Leia had listened to her kindly. Leia was so strong. She was the general of the Resistance with great leadership skills and a kind but firm authority. She was also Ben's mother. When Rey had thought of that her voice had trailed off.

"Be-Kylo," Rey caught herself. "Is only getting stronger." She looked into Leia's brown eyes and was startled to see how much they were like her son's. "He asked me to join him," she said softly. "To rule the galaxy with him." She bit her lip to keep some of her pain concealed.

Leia's heart twisted when she realized that Rey cared for her son. She was hurt and disappointed, but that was _because_ she cared for him. Leia looked at Rey with the smallest glimmer of hope.

"Tell me," she said. "Is my son still alive?" Rey tried to give her a sad smile, but her lips trembled.

"I hope so. I think so," she replied. "I saw glimpses of Ben before Kylo Ren took over again. I don't think he's beyond saving." Rey looked at the general with hope and desperation. "I wanted to help him, I…" she trailed off before lowering her gaze to the broken lightsaber in her hands. Leia's gaze softened with sympathy and she squeezed Rey's hand tenderly.

"You care for him," she stated simply. Rey opened her mouth as if to protest, but then shut it because Leia was right. She did care for him. She cared for Ben, not Kylo. She nodded solemnly.

"I do. I wanted to help him but I…" she trailed off. Leia squeezed her hand empathetically and gave Rey a small smile.

"Thank you," she said. "For giving me hope that my son isn't gone." Rey looked up and saw how much love Leia's eyes held for her son, and how much compassion she held for Rey.

Rey was pulled out of the memory and found herself on her bed again. She felt something on her cheeks and her hand touched her face. It came away wet and she hastily wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. Then she felt it. The telltale rumble in the Force, the noises around her fading into nothingness, and the familiar tug on her consciousness. She looked up and found herself staring into the eyes of Kylo Ren.

Rey froze for a moment as a thousand emotions swept through her body. Before she could stop herself, she felt a flash of relief and gladness that he was there. It had been weeks since Crait and despite everything, she had missed him, she missed his comforting presence that reminded her that she wasn't alone. She had tried so hard to block out their connection, and she didn't realize how taxing it was until now. It had opened a few times before, but one of them always closed it off, the longest interaction between them barely sustaining a few words. She remembered the first time it opened, a few days after Crait. She had been caught by surprise but she quickly tried to close the connection. Kylo had stubbornly persisted. He had opened his mouth to speak when Rey had cut him off.

"_Don't,_" she hissed through gritted teeth. Her vision was blurred with tears as she glared at him. She thought she saw a flash of sadness in his eyes before she slammed the connection shut.

The next time it had opened, Rey had ended up shouting at him. The most infuriating part of the entire exchange was his calm demeanor and he barely reacted to her outbursts. It reminded her of the first few times where she had yelled at him angrily but he only responded calmly, trying to figure out the logistics of the Bond instead of responding. The only difference was that now his eyes held anger and betrayal in addition to the constant pain and conflict. His eyes had hardened when she had finished yelling. He had closed the Bond that time. That had been over a week ago.

Now, in the _Falcon_'s alcove Rey cursed when she realized that the Bond had already opened all the way and it was too late to close it. The feel of their Bond was familiar and soothing and she desperately wanted to wrap herself in that comfort like a warm blanket. But those comforting sensations were quickly replaced with anger, hurt, and frustration as she forced herself to remember that they were enemies. She began to open her mouth when she saw his eyes. They were full of pain as he stared at her. Her breath was uneven and shaky but was also in perfect sync with his. His pain mixed with hers and Rey was overwhelmed with the depth of emotion flowing between them. She opened her mouth again and forced her voice to dislodge itself from her throat. She didn't want to appear weak.

"Happy with your new position?" she asked sarcastically. "You got everything you wanted, didn't you? You're Supreme Leader, Luke Skywalker is dead, you won a big battle against the Resistance which has been reduced to barely anything, thanks to you." Her voice was bitter when she said that last part.

"I didn't," his voice cut through the air as it echoed before and after he spoke.

"You didn't what?" Rey asked, confused.

He looked at her straight in the eyes and said, "I didn't get everything I wanted." His dark eyes bored straight through her as she realized what he meant. Her eyes widened before she forced a dismissive look on her face.

"You don't want me," she said hastily, looking away from him. "You just wanted my power and you have plenty of that," she scoffed. His eyes hardened when she said that.

"Is that really what you think?" he asked a low edge to his tone. "That the only reason I asked you to join me was because of your power?" His gaze was angry now, but Rey didn't look at him.

"It's easier to believe that," she stated quietly, half to herself. She didn't move her eyes back up to his until he spoke again, his voice low.

"Why didn't you just take my hand?" he asked, his voice breaking slightly. Rey met his gaze and her throat tightened.

"You know why I couldn't," she replied. He raised his eyebrow.

"Couldn't or wouldn't?" he challenged.

Rey groaned in frustration and anger.

"Why does it matter to you? You told me I was nothing!" she asked angrily.

"I didn't mean it like that and you know it," Kylo said. His voice was louder now. He had been sitting before but now he stood angrily and walked towards her. "Why do you remain in denial? Why do you cling to a hope that doesn't exist? You know I was telling the truth about your parents." Rey flinched and felt as if she'd been stabbed by a lightsaber. She hated that he brought up her parents because it had been tormenting her ever since the _Supremacy._ Then she realized how close he was. She shrank back further against the wall.

"Stop it," she said, turning her body away from him. "Just go."

"No." She turned to look at him suddenly, confusion, anger, and fear on her face. "Not until you give me an answer."

Rey's eyes narrowed as she glared at him.

"I don't need to explain myself to you. I'm sure you could figure it out yourself." Her voice dripped with sarcasm, but it was to hide the hurt that lay underneath the surface. His large frame dwarfed hers and he stood over her, but even though he was angry, she could sense that he had no intention to hurt her. Somehow, that scared her even more than if he did want to. At least that would have made sense.

"How are you so sure that I know your answer?" he asked. She looked at him and tried to back away but there was nowhere left for her to go.

"Don't you?" She asked, her voice was barely a whisper and her anger was draining away but it was replaced with fear. Why was he affecting her like this? It was as if she had no control over her body. He leaned even closer to her, making her heart skip a beat. He looked at her suddenly with an overwhelming amount of conflict and pain in his eyes. His dark hair had fallen across his forehead, and Rey had the strangest urge to push it out of his eyes. He paused and just stared at her for a moment in a way that made her toes curl. He continued to stare into her eyes and she could see her own reflection in his irises. Then the mask cracked and she could see Ben, without the darkness of Kylo Ren.

"Ben?" she asked softly, her voice barely audible. His eyes softened and he dropped his gaze as if unable to look at her anymore. After a moment, he brought his gaze back up to hers.

"I don't know, Rey," he said softly. "I don't know." Then he was gone.

Rey was alone again in the _Falcon's_ sleeping quarters. There were goosebumps all over her body as his words rang in her ears. _I don't know. _Rey groaned and flopped onto her back. Her anger had drained away but that allowed her confusion to take hold. She didn't know why he had such an effect on her. But all she could think about at that moment was the way his dark, expressive eyes looked at her when she called him "Ben."


	14. Repairs

**Repairs**

Loud footsteps echoed throughout the _Finalizer _as Kylo Ren stormed down the corridor. His boots stomped against the floor as he made his way to his quarters. He shoved past the stormtroopers outside of his door and stormed in. The doors slammed shut behind him with a loud _clang. _He stood panting for a moment, squinting his eyes to adjust to the brilliant white walls of the room. His cowl fell to the floor along with his cape into a crumpled heap. He tore off his shirt as Kylo went to the washroom to clean himself up. He splashed water on his face, hoping that it would help clear his head. But as the droplets of water rolled down onto his bare chest, it just reminded him of the very thing he was trying to forget.

One of the very first Force Bonds he had had with the scavenger, with Rey, he ended up with water on his face, despite the fact that his surroundings were completely dry. He had wiped his gloved hand across his face, to see drops of ocean water dripping down the black leather. So now he watched as droplets of water fell from his face into the sink.

His grip on the edges of the basin tightened as Rey's face flashed through his mind. He could so distinctly remember the freckles across her nose, her piercing hazel eyes, the way her hair brushed against her shoulders, the way her lips had parted when looked at him in the elevator… Kylo squeezed his eyes shut to try to block out the memory, to keep all the emotions that it carried from spilling out. How could someone elicit so much pain from the simple memory of their face, when that same face was one of the only people in his life he held compassion for?

It had been almost 4 months since Crait. The sting of her rejection still lingered, but logically he knew why she hadn't. But the emotional part of him could tell that she had wanted to. So why was she denying it? The last time he had seen her was when she had accused him of getting everything he wanted. He remembered the way her eyes widened and the way her cheeks flushed when he had said that he didn't have everything he wanted. He had wanted her. Hell, he still wanted her. And he didn't even know what that meant.

A sudden realization struck him. Snoke had claimed that he had created the Bond between him and Rey. But then why hadn't it dissolved after his death? When he saw her on Crait, he reasoned that it was just the lingering presence of Snoke remaining between them. When he had last seen her, he was so distracted that he didn't even think about it.

Suddenly he heard a crash outside of the bathroom door. He rushed outside to see what it was, not even bothering to cover his chest. He startled in surprise to see Rey. She was sitting at a desk of sort and she wore a look of frustration. She must have thrown something. Her head swiftly turned to look at him, and then her cheeks flushed bright red when she saw him. He thought he saw her eyes flick over his body as they lingered on his chest for the briefest of moments. She seemed to catch herself and turned away quickly again.  
"Kriff, Ben," she groaned. "Again? Put something on!" Kylo looked down, suddenly remembering he was wearing no shirt. He looked back up to see her looking at him again and smirked as she quickly turned away again.

"Enjoying the view?" he teased. Rey glared at him sharply and he noticed she made an effort to only stare at his face.

"Oh for Force's sake-" she rolled her eyes. "You're insufferable."

"You didn't deny it," Kylo said, still smirking.

"Shut up," Rey grumbled, still avoiding his gaze. Then Kylo noticed the object in front of her. His uncle's lightsaber. Or what was left of it.

"What are you doing?" he asked, genuinely curious. She looked at him in surprise as if she wasn't expecting him to ask. Her hands toyed with a small tool as her gaze shifted to the broken lightsaber.

"I'm trying to fix the saber," she said. Kylo took a few steps towards her to get a better view. She flinched slightly but didn't move.

"Doesn't look like that's working out for you very well," he said as he picked up the pieces. He felt her glare at him again.

"I did say I was trying," she argued. "Plus I never exactly learned how to build one." She paused slightly and Kylo turned to look at her. Her gaze was on the table and she seemed lost in thought. "I'm good at fixing things," she said softly. "I had to be in order to survive. So it's very trying when I've stumbled across something that can't necessarily be fixed with a few hex bolts and a new power cell." He looked at her in surprise. He hadn't expected her to open herself up like that to him. Rey then seemed to snap out of her daze and her eyes focused on the saber once more. "It's the crystal that's giving me issues. The rest of the mechanical stuff I can do. I've read through the Jedi texts but there's not much it saws on how to fix a broken kyber cryst-" she stopped suddenly and bit her lip as if she had said too much.

Kylo's gaze softened as he remembered making his own saber. He took the broken pieces from her gently and inspected them. The crystal had sheared in half, it would be very hard to heal it.

"Try meditating on it," he said, his own voice surprising himself. Rey looked at him suddenly, a confused expression on her face. "Meditating on the crystal and bonding yourself to it in a way is how most Jedi create their lightsabers. Even though it's not necessarily your crystal, you should be strong enough to be able to heal it to some degree." He turned to meet her eyes and his lips turned up ever so slightly. "You should be able to build something to stabilize it afterward." She looked at him in shock and when she took the pieces back from him, her hands were shaking.

"I… thank you," she said softly. It took her a while to meet his gaze. Then she jumped slightly when she turned her head only to find Kylo's bare chest inches away. Kylo caught her gaze and pulled back, giving her space. He leaned back against the wall behind him, the metal was cold against his bare skin. There was that look again. Her hazel eyes swept over his body again before she lifted her gaze upwards. Later, he could have sworn he saw her eyes linger on his lips before moving back up to his eyes.

"Why are you helping me?" she asked, her voice breaking the silence. Kylo raised his eyebrow in confusion. Rey nodded her head slightly towards the lightsaber.

"This is a weapon that I've tried to kill you with," she paused for a moment and her voice lowered. "That I probably will use against you later…" Her eyes went to her lap and she bit her lip anxiously. "So why would you help me?" He blinked as her question threw him off guard. What she was saying made sense. They were enemies, and if this was her weapon, shouldn't he be trying to keep it broken, so she couldn't use it against him? Kylo opened his mouth as if to speak and then closed it. He focused on one of the panels of his floor as he struggled to come up with an answer.

"I don't-I…" he started before trailing off. He could feel the heat of her stare. When he finally lifted his head to meet her eyes. Her gaze was haunting, confused, nervous. His gut wrenched as he realized that this was the same look she had given him just before he had offered her his hand. His lips parted and he inhaled as if to speak, but no words came out. He gave up speaking and just shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. She seemed disappointed by his lack of explanation.

A beat of silence hung in the air, and the tension between them was almost suffocating. Rey had placed the saber down on the table and had stood up, mirroring his position. Then Rey's soft voice broke the silence like an ax cutting through ice.

"Why is this still happening?" Kylo looked at her when she spoke. "Snoke said that he had forged our connection, so shouldn't it have dissolved with his death?" She must have come to the same conclusion that he did.

"I'm not sure," he replied, honestly. "Unless he was lying…" He looked at her uncertainly.

"So…" Rey said. "What does that mean? That he didn't make it, or that he just initiated it?" She paused before saying softly, "Does that mean that whatever this thing between us is, that it's real?" His head jerked upwards as she said that. Her face held wondering, confusion, and he thought the slightest bit of hope had crossed her face. Was was the hope for? That their connection was real? That it wasn't?

"Maybe?" he said, his voice low and quiet. He desperately hoped it was real. That this connection, this Bond that he shared with the girl in front of him was real. He hoped that their relationship or whatever this was between them hadn't been completely manipulated by Snoke. His feelings felt like they were overflowing and then he realized that he was feeling Rey's emotion in addition to his own. She was hoping for this to be real, too. Then he noticed something that made him smirk slightly.

"You have oil on your face," he said. Rey looked at him in confusion and brought her hand up to her face.

"No, I don't. Where?" she asked. Kylo tapped the side of his nose and his cheek.

"Here, and here." Rey wiped at her face again but only succeeded in smudging more oil on her face.

"Is it gone?" Kylo shook his head and smiled to himself as Rey tried again, but only added another black smudge on her chin.

"Now?" she asked, starting to get annoyed with him. Kylo smirked and shook his head.

"No, it's-kriff, just…" Kylo rolled his eyes and took a few steps forward, closing the short space between them. Before he realized what he was doing, his hand was on her cheek, and his other hand was wiping the grime off her face. She stiffened but didn't move away. They both seemed to hold their breath and Kylo paused to look at her, seeming to ask if this was ok. She breathlessly nodded ever so slightly. So he continued wiping the oil smudges off her face with his hand. Her skin was warm and her face seemed so small in comparison to his large hands. He tried not to look directly at her as he moved his thumb across her cheek. They had never really touched each other through a Bond, not since Ahch-To, and certainly not this much. Rey's gaze never left his face and as his thumb wiped the grime off her chin, it lingered there and he met her gaze. Her hazel eyes stared up at him with an emotion he couldn't quite place. The strength and intensity of the emotions flowing between him and Rey were almost too much to even comprehend.

The logical part of his brain was telling him to let go and to pull away. She was his enemy. He was hers. But it was as if he had been frozen in place, unable to move, even if he wanted to. Then his breath hitched when that thought came to mind. _Even if he wanted to. _He had the strangest urge to run his thumb along her lower lip. That thought was enough to bring him back to reality. He took his hands away quickly and stepped backward, almost bumping into the wall behind him. Rey seemed shaken, too.

Rey's eyebrows furrowed like they did whenever she was confused or worried. Her lips were shut together in a tight line before she opened them to speak.

"Ben, I-" Her voice was cut short when she disappeared from his sight. Kylo was left staring at the light reflecting off the white panels of his floor. His brain was racing, trying to make sense of what had just happened. It seemed so surreal, like a dream. But when he lifted his hand, there were black oil smudges on his fingers.

* * *

**Author's Note: Sorry if this seems out of character for Kylo. His character was much more sarcastic in the Last Jedi novelization, so this would match up more with that version than the version we see in the film.**


	15. Lucid Dreams

**Lucid Dreams**

Rey tossed and turned in her small bed on the _Falcon. _Her muscles ached from training earlier today. Leia had set up a training course for her on Ajan Kloss, where she had to capture multicolored ribbons while fending off training droids at the same time. Her arm was still sore from when the red droid had caught her in the arm. She kept losing her temper during the course which only served to frustrate her more. Her fists clenched the rough fabric of her sheets. Finally unable to stay still any longer, Rey sat up and rubbed at her arm. She carefully unwrapped the leather armband that she wore on her right arm near her shoulder. When she did, she could see her scar. Two hands reaching for each other. Her heart twinged slightly. How long ago had this been? It had been over half a year since she suffered this injury from one of the Praetorian guards. It still hurt at times and she wasn't sure if it was because it still physically injured, or if she was feeling the emotional pain that came with the scar.

Rey bit her lip so hard that it split and she didn't even notice until she tasted blood. She pressed her lips together in a tight line and carefully rewrapped the armband. As she uncovered her scar, her thoughts inadvertently drifted to Kylo. Her mind flew back to their last connection. Had it really been more than 2 months? She remembered it like it was yesterday. Rey couldn't stop thinking about how patient he was when he helped her with the lightsaber, and how gentle he was when he was cleaning her face. She had been glued to the floor, barely able to breathe. His fingers left trails of fire on her skin. His hand had been so large compared to her own and it encompassed her entire cheek. It was warm but also calloused from years of training. When he had looked at her, she'd seen so many emotions swirling in his dark brown eyes. He'd looked at her with tenderness, compassion, and… longing? She remembered the way her chest had tightened when he touched her, or even when he was in the same space as her. Her cheeks flushed red and burned hotly when she remembered seeing him shirtless, _again_. Without even realizing it, she had openly stared at his toned muscles of his abs and chest. She remembered the way that droplets of water had rolled down his skin and it had flustered her in a way that she hadn't been before. There were times when he was so kind to her-when he was Ben-but then the other times they were at odds and trying to kill each other. Rey's hands rubbed her temples in an attempt to alleviate her growing headache.

Despite her headache, she could easily identify the tremor she felt in the Force, with the world around her quieting, and that all too familiar presence of _him_. Her hair was free of her usual hairstyle, and she ran her fingers through her brown locks before she moved to face the wall, and found him there.

Kylo was sleeping and she was surprised to see how much younger he looked when he was sleeping. The hardness of his features had softened, the lines of hardship and anger fell away, and he didn't look like he was carrying a giant weight on his shoulders. His skin was smooth, save for a few moles here and there and his scar. Her scar.

She kept still, not wanting to wake him. But her body had a mind of its own as she slowly turned and lay back down on her bed so she was on her side facing him. Her hand slowly reached out towards his face and brushed aside a strand of black hair from his forehead. Rey didn't even know what she was doing. This was wrong, wasn't it? Even as the thought entered her mind, she found herself gently tracing the scar down his cheek and across his jaw. She realized that her mental shields were down since she was so distracted. She quickly formed a barrier around her mind. She mustn't let him know where the Resistance was. Their minds bled into each other's at times so she desperately hoped that he had not seen her location subconsciously.

She must have moved or made a noise because Kylo moved in his sleep and his eyes fluttered open. Rey froze, not knowing what to do. Her hand was still on his jaw. His dark eyes transfixed her and all she could do was stare for a bit. When she tried to take her hand away from him, his hand reached up and gently caught her own hand in his. He moved it back to his face almost as if he were in a trance. He seemed only half awake, his eyes slightly glassy.

He blinked slowly and mumbled sleepily, "Are you an angel?" Rey was taken aback by his question. She tentatively reached out to him through the Force and was surprised to see that his guard was down and his mind was opened to her freely. He really must still be half-asleep. Her eyes came back to his, still questioning and expressive. They held wonder, curiosity, and longing. The last one made her breath hitch.

She hesitated before softly whispering, "No, Ben, I'm not. Why would you think that?" She gave in to her desires if only for a moment, and let her fingers play with his soft hair. He was only half-awake anyway. She hoped he wouldn't remember this later. Wait, did she want him to remember this? His eyes became focused as he met her gaze and then he spoke with a tremendous amount of calm and certainty.

"Because they're supposedly the most beautiful creatures in the galaxy." He said this with such finality and tenderness that Rey's throat tightened. He thought she was beautiful? Then she remembered that the only clothes she was wearing were sleep shorts and a rather revealing tunic. Her cheeks burned and she turned her gaze away, embarrassed.

"I'm not beautiful," she said softly. "I'm nothing, remember?" Her voice cracked slightly at that last statement and she saw a flash of regret in his eyes. She hated that even she could hear the underlining hurt that her voice carried. Her hand stopped moving in his hair as he gently pulled it down from his head. He lay on his side and looked at her. He didn't let go of her hand. Rey shivered slightly, as she tried to avoid his gaze.

"You're not," he said softly. Rey still didn't look at him, afraid of what she would see. _Rey, look at me. _His voice rang in her head even though his lips didn't move. She reluctantly obliged and was struck by the sincerity in his face and instead of Kylo, she just saw Ben.

"Not to me," he whispered as his eyes blinking sleepily. Rey didn't try to remove her hand from his grasp. His thumb stroked her wrist and he aimlessly traced a pattern on her palm. Rey felt her heart stutter as she looked at him. He was already falling asleep again. Rey smiled sadly, knowing that moments like these were always short, stolen in time. She began to pull her hand away but his grip tightened, his eyes opening again. His eyebrows drew together in concern and he frowned slightly. He let go of her hand to reach for her arm. Rey froze, not knowing what to do. She felt his fingers trace her scar and it felt like her skin was on fire.

"Did this not heal yet?" he asked softly, looking at her with genuine concern and Rey's chest tightened. She forced herself to hold his gaze, even though his eyes threatened to drown her in emotions. A piece of hair fell against her cheek as she shook her head slightly.

"No, it did," she replied. "It just hurts sometimes." A flicker of sadness seemed to pass over his face as he caught her double meaning. Without breaking eye contact, he moved his hand from her arm to her face as he brushed the strand of hair behind her ear. The heat of his fingers remained on her face long after he drew his hand away. He gave her a long look, his eyes roamed over her face but it felt like he was analyzing her entire being.

_Ben? _she asked with her mind. He didn't answer her and his eyes fluttered shut. Wondering if he had fallen asleep again, she gently touched his cheek again. His eyes opened and her breath hitched when she saw how intensely he was gazing at her. His full lips turned up ever so slightly as he slowly fell back into unconsciousness.

"Yeah," he whispered, already closing his eyes. "Absolutely beautiful." Rey felt him fall back asleep as his breathing slowed and his body relaxed. Before she pulled away from his mind, she considered his last words. Was he telling the truth? She almost didn't want to know. But curiosity got the better of her and she looked to see if there was any deception in his words. There wasn't.

She drew back as the Bond closed. Her breath was shaky and uneven. For some reason, the fact that he had been telling the truth scared her more than if he hadn't been. Rey could still feel the warmth of his hand on her skin, the intensity of his gaze, and the meaning of his words ringing in her ears.

Rey turned on her other side so her back was to the wall. Where Kylo had been. Or had it been Ben who was lying next to her? Rey could feel her heart pounding in her chest, and she felt as if she were drowning in an ocean. Too many emotions washed over her for her to process any of them. So she lay inside the _Falcon,_ confused and conflicted. And she reached out to the Force for answers. For why her head and her soul were tearing her apart. It took a long time for Rey to fall asleep that night.

* * *

**Author's Note: Just one more non-canon chapter before TROS! Gotta set up the conflict between them so they're in the right emotional state before I start writing TROS scenes.**


	16. What We Can't Have

**What We Can't Have**

***Disclaimer: The following contains some swearing. It is censored with ** and such but this is just a warning. **

They stared at each other for the longest time. Neither one of them moved a muscle or even batted an eyelash. The pair's breath was uneven and they both looked shaken, but the two never broke eye contact with each other. The tension in the air was so thick, one could have cut it with a knife. The energy, the pull, the power between the two was so overwhelming that it felt like waves of power were literally rolling off of them.

Rey turned off Luke's saber, the blue blade hissing as it disappeared from sight. It had been repaired and she was wearing a white tunic. She stared at the robed figure in front of her, not sure how to respond.

Kylo stared at Rey curiously, the Bond must have connected them while she was training. He noted that his uncle's lightsaber had been repaired. He looked at her and before he could stop himself, he found himself staring at her face. His gaze was entranced by the way stray pieces of Rey's dark hair curled in front of her ears and around her forehead. He noticed that she was wearing a different outfit since he had last seen her, more similar to the one she had worn when he had first met her. He felt his cheeks grow warm as he remembered that last time she had been wearing nothing but sleep shorts and a light sleep tunic that only accentuated her figure more acutely. His memory of that night was hazy at best, so he wasn't sure what he had said or done. Kylo tilted his head slightly as he noticed the way the sun lit up Rey's face in a strange pattern.

"Where are you?" The question was out of his mouth before he could stop himself. He winced as Rey's gaze hardened and he felt her mental shields go up instantly.

"I thought we weren't using this to attack each other, Ben," she said. Her voice was low and angry as she glared at him. Rey felt herself grow angrier as the thought of him using their Bond for the purpose of the war. Her mental shields were up and she could feel his go up too, but not before she glimpsed the flash of regret that he felt. At least he had the decency to look remorseful. He was distracted by something, but she couldn't tell what.

"Sorry, I didn't mean-" his voice trailed off. Kylo shut his eyes and methodically clenched and unclenched his fist. He sighed before opening his eyes but he kept his gaze on the ground refusing to look at her. "I was just…" He looked lost and Rey softened slightly.

"Distracted?" she finished for him. Kylo's eyes instantly met Rey's. He panicked slightly, worried that she had seen his thoughts when he had looked at her. But the way her brow was furrowed and he could tell that she was concerned, not angry.

"Yeah, that's one way of putting it," he mumbled, raking his gloved hand through his hair. Rey looked at him curiously, wondering what he meant by that.

"What is it?" she asked gently. Kylo still didn't look at her, so this time she sent the question with her mind. _Ben, what is it? _He looked at her sharply in surprise before he tried to close his mind away from her. She stopped him and pushed harder against his mental barriers, not to break in, just to make her presence known. _No, you don't get to do that. Not with me. _His eyes met hers and she almost flinched, taken aback by the turmoil she saw in them. He looked broken, lost, confused. She stepped towards him, her arms hung loosely at her sides. _Ben… _He closed his eyes when she sent his given name down the Bond. His broad chest rose and fell as he sighed before relenting.

"There have been rumors," he said softly. "Whispers of a message sent by…" he trailed off before looking her straight in the eyes. "A message sent by Palpatine, the Emperor of the Galactic Empire." Rey blinked in shock, trying to register what he had said.

"The Emperor," she said confused. "But that's impossible. He's dead." But her voice was uncertain and the muscle under Kylo's left eye twitched like it did whenever he was anxious.

"I thought so, too," he said, his gloved hands clenched into fists. His gaze had moved away from her, and he was biting his lower lip, seemingly without realizing it. Rey took note of this and her eyes lingered there for a moment before she caught herself staring. She lifted her own eyes to his, even though he wasn't looking at her.

"He's dead though, isn't he?" she asked quietly. She hesitated, debating whether or not she should continue. She decided to risk it. "Your grandfather," she said so softly that she wondered if he had even heard her. "Anakin Skywalker killed him." His head instantly whipped towards her at the mention of his grandfather's name. His eyes narrowed and he took a few steps towards her, his gaze angry. Rey barreled on before he could speak. "He turned to the light, he was redeemed!" Kylo was now only a pace away from her. He shook his head vehemently and shut his eyes and started to open his mouth to offer a rebuttal. Then Rey surprised both of them by grabbing his face in her hands and forcing him to look at her. "Ben." Her voice was soft and gentle as her eyes became hopeful. "It isn't too late."

Kylo was startled by the sudden contact and even though he wanted to break away, he was rooted to the ground by her gaze. Her eyes were pleading as they seemed to stare right through him. His heart was pounding, and his thoughts were a jumbled mess. He couldn't think clearly because all he could feel were Rey's hands on his cheeks. His mouth opened and closed like a gaping fish as he struggled to speak. Her face enchanted him. He couldn't stop staring at her. Her lips were parted slightly as she stared at him with her piercing hazel eyes, a stray piece of hair fell against her cheek as his eyes roamed her lightly freckled skin, from her high cheekbones to a small scar on her cheek-he wondered where she had gotten that from-and then he realized how close the two of them were. Their faces couldn't have been more than a few inches apart. He suddenly wanted nothing more than to have the girl in front of him in his arms, even though he knew it was wrong because they were enemies, weren't they? Yet here they were, her hands on his face, their bodies inches apart, and their eyes locked with each other's unable to look elsewhere. The Bond between them seemed to hum with energy, slowly increasing in intensity. Kylo could feel his breath and heartbeat in perfect sync with Rey's, and her eyes dropped to his mouth for the briefest of moments. He didn't realize he was leaning forward until their foreheads bumped together. They both drew back quickly, startled and red-faced. Kylo rubbed the back of his neck and avoided eye contact.

Rey pretended to readjust her armband but she could feel her cheeks burning. Kriff, what the hell was she doing? Since she couldn't seem to be able to open her mouth, she sent a message with her mind. _Sorry. _She could feel the wave of embarrassment that washed over her as she continued to avoid eye contact. His mind touched hers gently and she could feel his embarrassment too, but there was something else or lack of something to be more specific. She didn't feel any regret in his mind over what had just happened, or any anger. She finally looked up at him in confusion, and he wore a solemn expression on his face, one might have thought that he was apathetic if they didn't look at his eyes. They caught her own and she felt drawn to them like magnets.

_I didn't regret it if that's what you're wondering. _Rey flinched slightly when she heard his voice in her head. It was disorienting to look at him and not see his lips move physically but to hear his voice so clearly in her mind. He had the same look in his eyes when he had asked her to join him. Vulnerable, but honest and genuine. Her heart twisted painfully at the memory. _Why didn't you just take my hand?_ His voice rang in her head once more. That snapped Rey out of her stupor and her mental shields flew up and blocked him out. She glared at him, attempting to cover her embarrassment and hurt with anger.

"We're not doing this again," she said, crossing her arms and beginning to turn away.

"You still haven't answered," he persisted stubbornly. "You wanted to, didn't you?" Rey spun back around angrily to face him.

"No, I didn't! How many times do I need to tell that to you?" She could feel anger rising in her chest, threatening to burst out like an erupting volcano. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths to try to calm herself as Leia had taught her. "I didn't want to rule the galaxy, Ben!" His face was angry, too.

"Then what did you want?" he asked her, his voice rising. "I offered you everything! You wanted to, Rey. You know it, I know it. Why do you keep denying it!" He was so frustrated with her. Why did he want her to answer so badly? Why couldn't he just let it go?

"No, Ben you didn't!" she yelled. "I didn't want the kriffing galaxy, Ben!" Her eyes were shiny, and he realized that she was on the verge of tears. "You know what I wanted, Ben." Her voice was bitter, hurt, and shaky as she bit her lip in an attempt not to cry. A tear fell down her cheek anyway. Kylo grimaced as he watched the tear trickle down her face. He hesitated slightly before taking off his glove and wiping her cheek with his thumb. She didn't even look at him at this point, she just shut her eyes tightly.

"Rey," he said softly. When she didn't respond he spoke again both with his mouth and his mind. _Rey._ She finally craned her neck back slightly to look at him. She was so much smaller than him, and it was especially evident now in their close proximity. He let his hand linger on her cheek for a moment before reluctantly moving his hand away. He kept his gaze on her though, his eyes seeming to ask an unspoken question.

"You didn't offer me what I wanted," she said, her voice steadying. Her eyes were still shiny but no tears fell from her eyes. "You asked me for the wrong reasons."

"Kriff, Rey," Kylo said becoming frustrated again. "Then what would have been the 'right' reasons? Turning back to the light? Where my own family abandoned and betrayed me? To join a lost cause already on its dying breath? To be a good person?" His eyes were dark as they narrowed in anger. "I'm a monster, remember?" She flinched at her own words thrown back at her as he moved to turn away from her. "I don't have anything left there!"

"That's bullsh*t and you know it!" Rey said angrily. "_Leia _is part of that 'lost cause.' Your own mother isn't worth anything to you? Would you have killed her like you did your father?" Kylo froze for a moment and then he spun around and stalked over to her, his eyes dark, full of rage and pain. Rey's eyes widened when she realized what she had said, and she immediately regretted her words.

Kylo was fuming, his gloved hands clenched into fists so tightly they were shaking. "_Don't even go there_," he said menacingly, his finger pointing accusingly at her. "I had a chance to pull the trigger on the bridge! I could feel her there, and it would have been so easy. I didn't, Rey!" He was shouting. "I didn't want to kill my mother!" Rey's eyes were wide with confusion and shock.  
"Then who blew up the bridge?"

"One of the other pilots." Kylo shut his eyes tightly as his fist clenched at his side. "I would have stopped it if I could have." Rey looked at him skeptically, as if she didn't believe him. He growled in frustration and moved his hand to Rey's temple. She flinched violently and tried to pull away, but not before Kylo forced his own memories of indecision and anguish into her head to show her.

Rey jerked away from him physically and mentally. She pushed him away with the Force so violently he flew backward several yards.

"Get out of my head." Her voice was low and threatening with an underlying tone of malice.

Kylo barely heard her, he so was surprised by her lashing out and then he realized that she was fuming with anger. He could practically feel the power radiating from her. There it was, the Darkness that he'd seen inside her. Her inner conflict as she tried to bury her emotions only grew in intensity as he picked himself up and drew nearer to her. The waves of emotion rolling off from her were so powerful that it nearly overwhelmed Kylo.

But suddenly Rey staggered and the anger she felt dissipated as quickly as it had surfaced. Her eyes were wide and her breathing came in uneven gasps. She stared at her hands in horror and when she lifted her gaze to meet Kylo's, he wore a similar expression of shock. She tried to speak, but her voice refused to work. Her heart was pounding so loudly she half expected Kylo to hear it. She attempted to regain control, but she felt so unstable that the only thing she could think of was to mask her vulnerability with anger.

"Just don't," she said, biting her lip to keep tears from spilling down her cheeks. She couldn't tell if her tears were from anger or sorrow. Kylo seemed to still be in shock before he caught himself and lowered his mask of cool indifference once again.

"It's too late for me," he said, trying to keep his voice from shaking. "There's nothing there for me." Rey looked hurt and her jaw clenched tightly. Kylo began to turn away, trying to break the connection.

"Then why haven't you killed me?" Her question hung in the air as if a lightsaber had been held to his throat. He froze, not sure what to say.

After a long beat of silence, he responded without turning around.

"Why haven't you killed me, Rey?"

Rey's heart jumped when she heard him speak her name. She didn't know how to respond and before she could open her mouth, the Bond closed, leaving her alone and more confused than she had ever been.

Kylo felt the Bond close and he was almost grateful that he didn't have to hear her response. In a sudden burst of anger and frustration, he slammed his fist into the wall, leaving a dent in the metal.


	17. Visions

**Visions**

The sun shone through the treetops in the jungle of Ajan Kloss, warming the grass and rocks on the ground.

"Be with me…" Rey's eyes were closed as she meditated. She was sitting cross-legged but with the help of the Force, her meditation caused her to float upwards, leaving her sitting on nothing but air. Rocks surrounded her as they began to levitate around her.

"Be with me…" Her hands lay on her knees, and she tried to focus her breathing and reach out to the Force beyond her. She reached out to feel the Force flowing through and around her, over and under, in between light and dark, trying to find the balance. She could vaguely feel the cloth of her tunic against her skin, and the wind blowing strands of her hair.

"Be with me…" Rey's eyes remained closed for a few more moments before her expression became one of disappointment.

"They're not with me," Rey said as she opened her eyes. She groaned in frustration and let the rocks around her fall heavily to the ground. Her vision spun for a moment as she arched her back whilst flipping forward to land lightly on her feet. She huffed in annoyance as she walked back over to where her master, General Leia Organa, was standing with a kind smile on her face.

"Rey," she said sympathetically, and somehow, through that one syllable, she wrapped Rey in feelings of warmth, comfort, encouragement, and gentle firmness that made her the great leader she was. Her hair was pinned up in a way that was both elegant and practical and her regal robes of red and blue stood out against the green foliage surrounding them. Leia was everything that Rey strived to be one day, and the mother she never had.

"Be patient," Leia encouraged, her eyes crinkling in a soft smile.

"I'm starting to think that isn't possible," Rey said with an air of defeat. "To hear the voices of the Jedi who came before." Leia shook her head and gave her a knowing smile.

"Nothing's impossible," she said confidently.

"Nothing's impossible?" Rey raised an eyebrow with a slight smile on her lips. "I'm going to run the training course." Leia nodded and held Luke's repaired saber out to her, strangely reminiscent of when Rey had offered Luke his saber on Ahch-To so long ago. Rey looked down at Leia's hand and took the saber gently as if she were afraid it would break in half again. When she lifted her eyes back up to meet her master's, she saw nothing but compassion and encouragement in her eyes. Rey smiled before she ran past her and into the jungle.

* * *

Leia watched Rey sprint into the trees with a warm smile on her face, and her smile broadened when she noticed BB-8 chasing after her. It reminded her of R2-D2 when he would follow Luke around. She felt a growing sense of pride in her chest that she hadn't felt since… since Ben. Her smile slipped for a moment. Rey was a wonderful student, a brilliant, young, and headstrong girl that was full of life. She supposed that she saw a bit of herself in the young scavenger, eager, innocent, fierce, and perfectly capable of handling herself. She was often the most powerful or the most capable member of a team. She was close friends with the former stormtrooper, Finn, and Poe, and while Leia found it sweet at how much they worried over her, especially Finn, she couldn't help but chuckle a bit at the irony. Rey was often the one having to save them from danger, not the other way around.

Leia realized that she was twisting the ring on her finger, one of the last things she owned from Alderaan. It was a nervous habit and she looked up again to where Rey had disappeared. The girl was powerful but also kind and compassionate. She was also very stubborn and got frustrated easily when she wasn't able to do something, not realizing how fast she was learning things.

Rey was like the daughter Leia never had, and she reminded her of Ben so much that her heart ached. They were polar opposites at times, but also much more similar than she had initially noticed. However, Leia hadn't seen her son in a very long time, he might have been a stranger to her by now. Her chest ached when she thought of Han, but she didn't hold any anger towards her son for what he did. She knew that he was being manipulated by the Dark side, she had sensed it since before he was born. Leia blamed herself for not doing anything about it sooner. She had almost given up hope that her son would ever return to her, but Rey…

Leia knew that Rey cared for Ben much more than she wanted to admit. Despite her hurt at what had happened before Crait, Leia knew that she still held out hope for him. Rey had confided in her often about the events that had happened during her time with Luke, and after. She felt for the girl because she knew the agony she felt as she could only watch Ben fall further and further away from her. But it warmed her heart a little to know that someone cared for him and that he seemed to care for her. Leia didn't want to get her hopes up, but wasn't that the driving factor of her life? Hope? It's how she had met Han, wasn't it? And Luke? _Oh, Luke, _Leia thought. _What do I do? How can I help Rey? How can I help her… and Ben?_

* * *

Rey sprinted past the trees, the wind whipping her hair and clothes. She was vaguely aware of BB-8 rolling as fast as he could behind her, trying to keep up. Rey called on the Force to fuel her legs, to make it seem as if she were almost flying across the ground. She was breathing heavily by the time she reached the large ditch. She grabbed the helmet from the stick and glanced behind her as the familiar buzz of the training droid whizzing towards her. The thin branch that stretched across the drop wobbled as she stepped on it. Even though it felt as if she was going to fall to her death, Rey took a deep breath and completely immersed herself in the Force. She pulled the blast shield down so it covered her face, ignited her lightsaber, and stepped out off the cliff.

Rey was still facing the side she had left on as she let the Force guide her actions. She was almost able to see the remote as small laser blasts shot towards her. She deflected it away with her lightsaber, the blue blade contrasting sharply against the red hue of the bolt. It wouldn't kill her, but it would still sting. Although Rey wasn't sure if it stung her body or her pride. It was as if she could feel the droid move as if it were part of her as she raised her saber again. She turned around but her concentration wavered and she nearly lost her footing. Trusting the Force, she recovered quickly and deflected three shots back to back. The blade of her saber hummed as it sliced through the air. Rey dropped her saber to catch it with her other hand in a reverse grip, to deflect another shot to her legs. It reminded her of how she had first used that technique with the Praetorian Guard on the _Supremacy _with… No, she couldn't think of him now. She quickly pushed him out of her mind as she pulled off the helmet, letting it fall to the ground as she ran forwards, her movements rustling the foliage around her.

Continuing to deflect blasts from the droid, Rey called on the Force again to help her scale the tall tree in front of her. Still wielding her lightsaber, she grabbed a branch with her hand and braced her feet against the trunk. Her other hand slashed her lightsaber through the air, cutting the red ribbon hanging from the limb. Rey dropped to the ground and quickly switched off her lightsaber. Her hand shot out to catch the red fabric, the edges still smoking from her saber.

She broke into a dead run, running back the way she came. Instead of crossing the gorge ahead via the branch, she simply continued to run across a log and the Force helped her leap across to the other side of the cliff. BB-8 whistled as he saw her coming. Rey dropped into a roll as she landed and began running through the jungle again, with BB-8 and the training droid close behind.

* * *

A cloud of vapor rose into the air with a hiss as the compartment opened. As the smog cleared, it revealed the remnants of the helmet of Darth Vader. Waves of darkness and power seemed to be rolling off of it. Kylo Ren stared down at the battered and worn helmet with almost a detached interest. He no longer held Vader on a pedestal anymore, he had grown to embrace his own power.

As the last of the mist cleared away, Kylo put his gloved hand on the mask. He could feel the power around it and he closed his eyes as he went deep into the Force. She wouldn't be hard to find. She never was.

* * *

Rey was running faster and faster and the adrenaline was pumping through her veins, she felt invincible at that moment. Suddenly, her foot caught on a tree root and she fell to the ground. She grunted as she fell, her frustration mounting. She bolted upright instantly and called her saber to her hand and ignited it, dirt still clinging to her clothes. The red training droid flew past her head and before she could blink, it fired. Rey felt the bolt hit her upper arm and she winced. BB-8 stopped when Rey fell and turned around to look at her.

Rey felt a surge of anger rising in her chest, all of her frustration and her worries building up, so she released it through her arm and swung her saber. The blue blade sliced through empty space as the droid nimbly moved away. She held her saber in a defensive position and narrowed her eyes at the droid, copying its movements. BB-8 looked back and forth between Rey and the droid and beeped in confusion. Rey lunged and stabbed forwards but again her blade was only met with air and she stumbled forwards. The droid managed to hit her in the arm again. She gave a yelp of pain as she backed away. Her lips pressed together tightly and her eyes darkened. She turned back to face the droid again, yelling and baring her teeth. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she heard Leia's voice telling her to calm her emotions. But Rey didn't listen to her, she was tired of this and she was angry.

Rey swung her saber, again and again, yelling in frustration as she continued to miss. The blade shook violently as it cut through a tree trunk but Rey didn't even seem to notice. She tried another slash to her left but she overestimated and it cut down another tree and a flurry of sparks spewed forth from her blade. She was vaguely reminded of Starkiller Base when the trees had been falling around her and Ky- no. She cleared her head and was only focused on the infuriating droid evading her. Her face was tight and her teeth were bared as she yelled fiercely.

Kylo's eyes were still closed, but he could see her so clearly. He could feel her, see her, in the Force. He focused more and reached deeper and deeper.

Rey was seeing red now, and her anger was overtaking her. Yelling, she threw her lightsaber towards the droid. It missed and it spun, cutting through trees as it made its way back to her. Frustration mounting, Rey thrust out her hand and a dead branch flew into her grasp. She spun the branch and slammed it into the droid, pinning it to a tree. With her other hand, the red ribbon still in her grasp, her saber smacked into her palm with a resounding thud. She glared at the droid, breathing heavily.

Kylo searched deeper and deeper, until at last. He found Rey's consciousness and latched onto it. She was angry, and he fed into it before suddenly he stopped short.

Rey's eyes snapped in front of her as if her gaze was abruptly drawn by something unseen. She could feel something, no, _someone_ in her mind… Suddenly she could no longer see the tree in front of her. Her vision flashed and she heard a horrible screech of lightning and thunder.

She was somewhere dark, she didn't know where. It was cold, Rey felt as if icy tendrils were crawling down her back. Lightning flashed and she could see a hulking black silhouette, spikes jutted out from the sides and pure darkness rolled off of it.

Rey saw herself as a child, screaming as a ship flew away from her. A beautiful woman filled her vision then, her face worried, a blue hood pulled over her head as she clutched her child to her chest. Her green eyes shone with fear and Rey felt a sense of terror and desperation wash over her. Rey was breathing heavily, her face becoming more and more pained. Then she heard a bloodcurdling scream.

"NO!" a woman's voice screamed in agony, eerily similar to Rey's. Rey felt panic rising up in her, but she was paralyzed, unable to move anywhere else, or even close her eyes. Her vision flashed again and she saw was back on the dark planet and lightning illuminated the horrible black shadow. It was a throne, she realized, and someone was sitting in it! Rey felt dread boiling in her stomach.

"Join me." Her heart froze when the low, familiar voice filled her ears. She saw Kylo holding out his hand to her in desperation on the _Supremacy. _She could feel his agony and anguish at her refusal as if it were her own.

"Join me," his words rang in her ears as she was transported back to the throne and was horrified to see herself sitting upon it. Her skin was deathly pale, a black hood was drawn over her head, and her eyes were milky white, staring into nothingness. Then her eyes were open, but a black hood was still drawn over her face, but her cold expression was illuminated by the red glow of double-bladed red lightsaber.

Kylo saw all of these images flash past him. He saw Rey, he saw Exegol, he saw himself, he saw Rey again. He heard his own voice, pleading with her to take his hand. Then it was replaced by a much deeper and menacing voice.

"Join me," the voice of Darth Vader echoed in his head but Rey could hear it, too.

"Ben, no!" Luke's voice screamed through their ears as they saw Luke Skywalker standing on Ahch-To, the way Rey had seen him when she had offered him his lightsaber for the first time.

They saw Kylo's face, dirty and sweaty from Mustafar. Ash and dirt clung to his face and his hair fell into his eyes as he shook his head slightly, eyes downcast.

Kylo's eyes flew open but instead of seeing his quarters on the _Steadfast, _all he could see were the images flashing through his mind.

"You killed him…" Snoke's voice taunted him as he saw his father walking towards him on the walkway in Starkiller Base.

"BEN!" He heard his father's desperate cry as he saw himself stab his father through the chest. Han Solo's face was pale, shocked, but it hurt the most when he reached to put his hand on his son's face. Kylo could still feel his hand on his cheek, the skin still warm as his father looked at him with sadness, resignation, and love. Han Solo's body tumbled off the walkway into the abyss below.

Kylo opened his eyes again, and this time he could see his grandfather's mask staring up at him with an accusing gaze. He tore his hand away from the mask and quickly left his chambers, his breath uneven. He clenched his gloved hands into fists to keep them from shaking.

* * *

On Ajan Kloss, Rey was breathing heavily and her body was trembling. She didn't know what to make of the visions, but she knew that she wasn't the only one who saw it. She could feel Kylo's presence leave her mind as quickly as it had entered. But she could feel his discomfort, as well. She knew that the visions hadn't entirely been her own, she could feel Han Solo's hand on her own cheek, and the pain and anguish in her chest that Kylo felt. She could remember his memories. Her body shook and she clung to the branch desperately for fear that she would collapse. Her breath came in uneven, heavy pants as she trembled.

An indignant beep brought her back to reality. She turned to see BB-8 trapped under a tree that she had cut down. Rey's eyes widened and she dropped her stick and the ribbon and rushed over to him.

"BB-8, I'm so sorry!" She knelt down next to the droid and saw that one of his orang discs had come loose and popped off, leaving parts of his wires and systems out in the open. Rey winced and she felt terrible for hurting her friend. Oh, no, she thought. Poe was going to be furious with her. Not that he needed to, Rey was already disappointed in herself.

When she made it back to base, she cleaned BB-8 and herself up as best as she could. She was stuffing things in her bag when she heard Leia come up behind her.

"I didn't finish the training course," she said sheepishly. "I got distracted." Rey flung her quarterstaff across her back and stood and turned to meet her master's gaze. "I'm just…" she paused, unsure how to continue. "Not feeling myself." When she met Leia's knowing gaze, she quickly said, "I know it looks … it looks like I'm making excuses." Leia shook her head kindly.

"Don't tell me what things look like, tell me what they _are_." Her voice was gentle, but Rey still felt uneasy.

"I think I'm just tired, that's all." She winced as soon as the words were out of her mouth and judging by Leia's expression, she knew it was a lie, too.

"General," Lieutenant Connix's voice came from the side. "The _Falcon _still hasn't arrived, Commander's asking for guidance." Kaydel Connix was a strong but kind woman, who was very much like Leia in a lot of ways. Leia nodded and Connix began to make her way back to the main hanger. Rey unhooked Luke's saber from her belt and handed it to Leia.

"I will earn your brother's saber," she said softly. "One day." As Leia took it, BB-8 beeped questioningly, earning a small smile out of Rey.

"No, you can't do it for me," she said, laughing lightly and smiling at the little astromech. Leia raised an eyebrow playfully.

"Never underestimate a droid," she said with a sly smile before walking after Connix. Rey turned to watch her leave and smiled faintly.

"Yes, Master." She looked down to see BB-8 beeping at her again. "I don't know, BB-8," she said, kneeling down in front of the droid. "I don't know what it was that I saw, and it just...the words just wouldn't come out of my mouth." BB-8 beeped a little more forcefully this time. Rey smiled and said, "No, I tell you everything. I know you can keep a secret." She winked and stood up. She began walking towards the mechanic's station to fix BB-8.

Her smile faltered a little, though, as she thought of her vision again. And when she thought of Kylo, her heart stuttered and she nearly stumbled over a power cord lying on the ground. She tried to clear her head but the only things she could see were Kylo's dark, piercing eyes. And she knew all too well how dangerously easy it was to get lost in his deep gaze that seemed to set her on fire every time he looked at her. BB-8 beeped again, and it shook Rey out of her trance enough to quickly follow BB-8 through the base, without thinking of _him_.


	18. The Ache Of Emptiness

**The Ache Of Emptiness**

Rey stood in the midst of the Festival of the Ancestors and paused for a moment to watch a group of Aki-Aki children. They were all sitting on a mat and seemed to be listening to a story. Their round and pink cheeks rose in grins and laughter and Rey couldn't help but smile at the heartwarming scene. But her smile faltered slightly when she was reminded of how she never got to have this. Yes, the Resistance was like her adopted family and she loved them dearly, but she never got to have a childhood or time with her parents. Her heart ached with the sudden loneliness that washed over her. This place very much reminded her of Jakku, but Pasaana was full of life and celebration.

She felt something tug at her tunic and turned to see a young Aki-Aki girl in a green robe. She spoke softly in a language that Rey didn't recognize, but luckily, C3PO was there to translate.

"She is saying, 'Welcome,'" 3PO offered. Rey knelt so she was eye-to-eye with the Aki girl. Her voice was soft and melodious and it put Rey at ease. The local was holding a beaded necklace and seemed to be offering it to her. Rey bowed her head so the girl could place the necklace around her neck.

"Thank you," Rey said as she looked down at the necklace. "What is this?" She asked. "It's beautiful." The Aki girl spoke again, seeming to smile.

"Apparently, Mistress Rey, this particular necklace symbolizes fertility and good fortune," 3PO translated. The girl seemed pleased and Rey smiled.

"Thank you very much," she said. The girl spoke again, and Rey looked at 3PO to translate.

"Her name is Nambi Ghima," he said. Rey's smile broadened.

"That's an excellent name. I'm Rey," she replied. Nambi spoke again, her dark eyes inquisitive.

"She would be honored to know your family name, too," 3PO said. Rey hesitated, surprised by the question. She didn't expect the sharp pain and emptiness in her chest. Her smile slipped and she gave a small shake of her head.

"I don't have one," she said softly. "I'm just Rey." She tried for another smile, but this one didn't quite reach her eyes. Nambi looked a bit confused, but then Rey froze and her smile vanished instantly.

She stood abruptly and quickly walked away, the wind blowing sand over her boots. Rey weaved her way through the crowd before she came to a break in the line of people. The Force tremored around her, and then suddenly she could no longer hear the chatter of conversation around her nor the whistling of the wind. Rey felt a chill run down her spine and she could barely hear the sound of the fire bursting behind her. If her world was muted, then that meant…

The sunlight around her disappeared and darkness cast over the desert. People continued on with their activities as if nothing was happening, but Rey knew better. She steeled herself before she turned to face Kylo Ren.

* * *

Kylo tried not to let his surprise carry over the Bond. He had been looking for her, but he really had no more control than she did over this. His jaw tightened and he was glad that the mask hid his face and the shakiness of his voice. His chest tightened, thinking of their last meeting. All he could do for a moment was stare at her.

Rey nearly flinched in surprise, her hand tightening on her quarterstaff. He was wearing his mask. But it was different… Rey looked closer and then she could see the red lines in the cracks of his mask. He must have repaired it. She hated that he was wearing it again, he was hiding his face behind it. Wait, did she want to see his face? No, she couldn't think like that now. Then she remembered that she was on a mission and that he could NOT find her and her friends. Her mental shields flew up, and she desperately hoped he hadn't seen anything. He didn't move and Rey was beginning to think it wasn't even him. Then she heard his voice.

"Palpatine wants you dead." His voice was low and raspier with his mask on, and it sent shivers down Rey's spine.

She swallowed hard before saying, "Serving another master?" She was surprised to hear the disappointment in her voice.

"No," he answered quickly. "I have other plans." Of course, he did.

Kylo looked at Rey and behind the safety of his mask, he stole a few seconds to openly stare at her. They had ended on such bad terms last time that it was difficult not to let his emotions overwhelm him. But it was equally, if not more difficult to ignore her. Stars, she was beautiful. The light on her face bathed her skin in a golden glow, bringing out the multicolored flecks in her hazel eyes. Her hair was blowing in an unseen breeze, and her pink lips were full and parted slightly. His eyes traveled down her slim figure without his permission and he caught himself and swore silently. His gaze rested on her neck though, she was wearing a necklace made of husk and beads. Regaining his focus, he looked back up into her eyes.

"I offered you my hand once," he said, his voice echoing through the Bond. "You wanted to take it." He paused for a moment and noted that she didn't deny it. "Why didn't you?" He remembered her face when he had offered her his hand. It was full of conflict, indecision, pain, and longing.

Rey could see her face, too, and she remembered how badly she had wanted to take his hand on the _Supremacy. _But Rey's gaze was unwavering and even though she could feel the nerves and anxiousness coursing throughout her entire body, she forced herself to remain calm.

Without answering his question, she retorted, "You could have killed me. Why didn't _you_?" The image of her kneeling helplessly on the ground in front of him as Snoke ordered him to kill her flashed through their minds. Rey could remember the terror she felt when his lightsaber had been pointed towards her chest and the relief and elation that washed over just seconds later when he saved her instead. Kylo remembered that moment, too, with perfect clarity. Her face had been pleading, terrified. And his heart had wrenched at that moment seeing her in pain.

He didn't answer her question, either. He could tell that she was denying some truth to herself, like how she had denied the truth about her parents.

"You can't hide, Rey," he said, his voice eerily calm. "Not from me."

Rey felt her heartbeat quicken when he said her name. He didn't say it very often, but when he did, it always had this strange effect on her. She felt an electric current coursing through her entire body, making her head spin. Rey tried to regain her composure. She knew that she wasn't the only one in denial here.

"I see through the cracks in your mask," she said. "You're haunted. You can't stop seeing what you did to your father." She threw an image to Kylo, in perfect clarity and detail. Han Solo's hand on his son's face as Kylo's lightsaber stabbed him through the chest. Her horrified screams. Chewie's roar of fury. The pain that she knew he felt when his father looked at him with love even as his body fell into the abyss. She threw all of it at him. He flinched visibly and satisfaction washed over Rey, but it quickly vanished when he responded.

"Do you still count the days since your parents left?" He threw an image at her this time. The thousands of tally marks that she had scratched onto the interior of her fallen AT-AT she had called home. Each mark representing another day of loneliness and abandonment. It was her turn to flinch now, and she winced as his next words cut deep. Because they were true. "Such pain in you, such anger." He began to step towards her and Rey forced herself not to back away. She would _not _show weakness.

She tried to calm her mind, as Leia had taught her, but when Kylo stopped only inches away from her, she lost her concentration. He was so much taller than her that she had to crane her neck back slightly. She could smell the molten iron from his mask and noticed how his shadow cast over the ground and how his boots were covered in sand as if he were truly there with her. She wanted to back away, to put some distance between them. But at the same time, she felt drawn to him as if the Force itself was drawing them together. She had to consciously stop herself from leaning towards him.

His voice was soft when he spoke and it held a touch of vulnerability, with the immense amount of tension and regret he was feeling hiding just below the surface. "I don't want to have to kill you," he said, and Rey knew he was being completely truthful here. "I'm going to find you and I'm going to turn you to the Dark side." Her gaze hardened when he said that.

Kylo regarded her and his voice lowered even more. "When I offer you my hand again, you'll take it." He could feel her turmoil of anger and pain in her. She was trying so hard to bury it, but he knew that it was there, just aching to be released. Rey's piercing eyes hardened and Kylo felt the Force churning around them, their power coupling with each other.

Rey gave Kylo a hard stare, and she said adamantly, "We'll see," echoing his words from when they had first met. When she was strapped in that cold and unforgiving interrogation chair. Kylo stared at her, not saying anything. His maddeningly calm demeanor irritated Rey more and more by each passing moment. She was about to speak again when suddenly his hand lashed out faster than the eye could see. He yanked the necklace from her neck, his hand brushing against her chest.

Kylo didn't even know what he was doing and it only fully registered with him when his hand touched her chest. She was gone, and he was left in his quarters, the necklace hanging from his hand. He stood still for a moment trying to process everything before he came to his senses and left his chambers to locate an analyst. He was close to finding her, he knew that much.

* * *

Rey's hand immediately went to her neck, searching in vain for the necklace. It was gone. When she looked back up, daylight had returned and Kylo was nowhere to be seen. She stood frozen in shock for a moment. The Bond had been so powerful that time, she could feel the Force swirling between them and it had been so thick that it felt like drowning. Then Rey's eyes widened in horror. Kriff, he would be able to find them soon enough if he hadn't already. Rey turned back around and ran to find her friends, the nape of her neck still stinging and her heart still hammering from his touch.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Sorry, this is a bit shorter than the last chapter. Although I'm not sure if you guys prefer longer or shorter chapters lol. I'm thinking about extending some of the scenes so they include more than just Reylo because there are a lot of other things in the film that would be really fun to write. I'm very tempted to write some of the more humorous scenes and not just the ones where there are so many feels that we can't think straight lol. I also wanted to include the majority of the Death Star sequence including Rey's vision, although Kylo does arrive shortly after so I guess that would work. What do you guys think? Also, I'm debating whether or not to include Rey talking with Luke on Ahch-To because there's a quote in the novelization that I thought was really interesting. "I gave him some of my life. In that moment I would have given him all of it … died it I had to.


	19. Raw, Untamed Power

**Raw, Untamed Power **

The desert stood still, eerily calm. The wind whistled softly, but it was so faint that it was almost imperceptible. There were only two sounds dominating the atmosphere: the roar of the impending Tie Fighter, and the sound of Rey's breathing. In, and out. In, and out. She inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly to calm her racing heartbeat. She could feel him approaching. The strength of their Bond was so much stronger now that they were actually seeing each other in person without light-years and planets separating them. It had been so long… Rey closed her eyes and Leia's voice came to her head. _Be patient. Trust your instincts. Trust the Force, Rey. _Rey steeled herself and deftly unhooked Luke's lightsaber from her belt. She held it to her side for a moment, motionless as if she was waiting for something. As soon as Kylo's ship appeared on the horizon, the engines screaming, she ignited her saber, the blue blade humming in anticipation.

Kylo could sense her. He couldn't see her, but he could feel her presence as strongly as he could feel the vibrations of his ship and the controls under his fingers. His TIE _Silencer_ skimmed low above the ground, leaving clouds of sand swirling through the air. The ship was perilously close to the ground, and a lesser pilot would surely have crashed their ship by now. But Kylo was the grandson of Anakin Skywalker, and the son of Han Solo, the best pilots in the galaxy, perhaps only rivaled by Rey.

_Rey. _He could sense her fear, but she wasn't backing down. Kylo didn't know why he kept accelerating towards her, it was as if he wasn't in control of his own body. All of the painful memories associated with her came rushing back to him. The scar on his cheek, his hurt at her rejection, the frustration he felt with her, it all came down on him so suddenly that he was filled with an incomprehensible surge of rage. His gloved hands shook as he pushed the controls to their limit. It was as if he had tunnel vision, unable to see anything else. The _Silencer _picked up speed and every second that passed brought him closer to the beacon of light in front of him.

Rey was terrified, but calm at the same time. She turned around and crouched into a lunge with a determined expression on her face. Her face was calm as if she already knew what was going to happen as while she slowly stole a glance over her shoulder. A curl blew against her cheek as the wind whipped past her. His anger, his frustration, his strange urge to _kill_-she wasn't sure what to make of that-but she could feel all of it. His presence was so much stronger in person and so much more potent. But Rey pushed that aside to focus on the present, on the ship that was bearing down on her.

She waited as the ship got closer. Closer, closer, and...now! Rey flew into a sprint, running as fast as she could. The roar of the TIE's engines was deafening and she could feel the wind from its speed on her back.

Kylo was confused, why was she running? But kept accelerating, his body movements automatic and stiff as he ignored his cockpit's display lights flashing issuing a collision warning.

Right before he reached her, it was as if a presence had been lifted off of him. Wait, what was he doing? But it was too late, the TIE was already upon Rey.

Rey waited until just the right moment when she had gained enough momentum and just before Kylo's TIE ran her down, she called on the Force and leapt up into the air.

Below her, Kylo craned his neck to follow her trajectory, momentary shock freezing him in place.

She gripped her lightsaber firmly as she flipped upside down between the cockpit and its left wing. It almost felt as if she were in slow motion, every detail stood out to her, from the varying thickness of the clouds of dust underneath and behind her, the way the bright sunlight glinted off of the TIE's metal, or the heat from the engines as she flew past them with mere inches to spare. She thought she saw Kylo's face or his mask, but she wasn't sure. Time seemed to slow and she let her instincts take over, to trust the Force. She saw her arm reach down, and cut through the metal of the ship, shearing the left wing off from the cockpit. Then, the moment passed and she landed back on the desert ground, completely unscathed.

The controls and displays in Kylo's ship were flashing and beeping loudly. He had been so distracted by her surprising display of power, that he didn't realize what she had done until it was too late. He cursed, struggling to regain control over the ship. The metal groaned as the wing broke apart, leaving the ship unbalanced causing it to spin wildly. The other wing broke soon after, leaving the spherical cockpit tumbling across the sand before it crashed into a dune and exploded in a burst of fire and debris.

Rey watched from where she stood, still in the position she had landed in with shock across her face. The ship broke apart piece by piece and the cockpit tumbled into the desert ground by itself. Her heart froze when she saw the fiery explosion. Her eyes widened as she tried to comprehend what that meant. Was he dead? That would have been a good thing...right? But Rey's legs wobbled and she nearly crumpled to the ground at the idea that she had killed him. Her brain felt like it was about to explode from sensory overload and a massive amount of confusion, but her heart carried no such qualms. She didn't want him to die. Kriff, she desperately hoped she hadn't killed him. A pit of dread grew in her stomach but she had no time to think of it further.

"REY! REY!" she heard Finn scream. She whipped around to seem him pointing frantically at the sky. "They got Chewie! They got him!" Rey lifted her eyes to see a transport taking off and her eyes widened in horror. No, no, no, no, no. It was another ship taking off from the desert, taking someone she loved away from her. No, she would NOT let them take Chewie from her. In pure desperation, she shot her hand out and called on the Force to stop the transport.

* * *

Kylo ripped off his helmet and tried to suck in a breath of fresh air, but his lungs filled with smoke from the burning remains of his ship. Kriff, he was an idiot. What the hell was he doing?

He climbed free of the wreckage, batting at his clothes to extinguish the fire. When he was finally free from the blasted ship, he gasped and filled his lungs with fresh air, coughing to dispel the acrid smoke.

What the hell was that? It was as if an uncontrollable rage took over him, a rage to _kill. _He was shaking and when the next realization hit him, he nearly fell to his knees as if he had taken a blaster bolt to the chest. He was relieved that he hadn't killed her. He was glad that she was alive…

He hadn't been lying to her when he said he didn't want to kill her, and his gut wrenched when he realized how close he had been to killing her. The frightening thing was that he had _wanted _to, even though everything in his body was telling him the opposite.

But if the dark side was giving in to one's desires, it was starkly contrasted by his reckless impulses, and not to mention his mixed feelings for the scavenger herself… What _did_ he desire? Power? Control? Or did he just want the scav-no. He stopped himself before he could finish that thought. Thinking like that was dangerous and distracting. But Kylo could no longer deny or hide his confusion that was not only in his head but in his heart as well.

He felt a sharp tug in the Force, and he looked up to see Rey straining as she tried to pull down a flying transport. He was shocked and impressed with her display of power, but he would not let her have it. It didn't matter who was on the ship, she could _not_ have it. An idea came over him, to see if she would lose control, to show the darkness that she was trying so hard to deny. Acting on instinct, Kylo reached out with his own hand and pulled the transport to him, stopping its slow descent.

Rey's eyes widened as she felt him across the desert. He was alive. Before she could process how she felt about that, the transport suddenly stopped its descent and started tilting in the opposite direction. She tore her gaze away from the sky to see Kylo emerging from the burning ruins of his TIE, and saw his hand reach out to rip the transport away from her. No, she couldn't-she _wouldn't_ let him have Chewie.

Rey strained as hard as she could and her thoughts flashed to Leia. How she would tell her to calm herself, to trust the Force. But as soon as she thought of her master, she lost concentration and the ship dipped closer to Kylo. Rey couldn't feel anything except for the overwhelming terror that washed over her entire body. Her fear of losing Chewie, for her friends, for Leia. She was becoming angry, but it suddenly felt easier to pull the ship down. So she drew on it, ignoring the warnings that flashed through her mind. She called on all the pain in her life that she had felt. From Unkar Plutt's vicious beatings, her parents' abandonment, the gnawing hunger she endured nearly every day of her life, the fear she felt for Chewie and her friends, the crippling pain she felt when she saw Han Solo die, and the anger and frustration that she held for herself, and her anger that she held for Kylo. Her anger at her conflicted feelings where her brain was tugging one way, the _right _way, the _logical _way, but her heart was telling her something completely different that felt so wrong but so right at the same time. She hated that he made her feel like this, and she drew on that hate.

The ship twisted in the air between the two Force users, the metal creaking, and the engines groaning. Rey's hand shook from the effort as beads of sweat rolled down her face. Kylo was standing still, his face etched in concentration. Rey screamed in frustration as the ship twisted more and more in the air, not going towards one particular side or the other. It was as if they had reached a stalemate.

Rey's eyes flicked to Kylo and at the sight of his infuriatingly calm composure, a flash of white-hot anger bolted through her. It traveled through her spine, her chest and her stomach, and it burned all the way down her arm when suddenly raw, electric, terrifying power burst from Rey's fingertips.

Burning-hot arcs of electricity and power shot from her hand and wrapped around the transport. The blue tendrils of lighting greedily latched on to every part of the transport and everything inside, living and nonliving. After a moment, the ship exploded and Rey's arm was thrown backward from the force of the explosion. Kylo also drew back, stunned.

Rey looked down at her hand in absolute horror and then back up to the burning debris raining down from the sky. Every being aboard that ship had been reduced to ashes, destroyed beyond recognition. Rey desperately reached out through the Force. There were no life forms left on the transport.

"CHEWIE!" She screamed in such agony and desperation that the intensity of her pain rolled off her in huge waves through the Force. But it was too late, she had killed every living being on that ship. She could faintly hear her friends' cries of despair. Rey's entire body shook with horror and grief and she felt such a powerful sense of despair that she felt like she was drowning. She wanted nothing more than to collapse on the ground right where she stood.

"Rey!" She turned around, tears streaming down her face to see Poe yelling from the ship. "We gotta go! They're coming!" She looked in the direction where he was pointing, and sure enough, the familiar roar of TIE fighters filled her ears as they appeared on the horizon.

Rey could barely hear Finn calling her name as she looked at the burning transport again.

"Chewie…" she whispered in utter despair. She looked at her shaking hand and her breath was quickening and she couldn't seem to get enough air into her lungs. Rey looked up and saw Kylo staring at her in shock. At that moment, Rey wasn't sure if she wanted to scream at him and hit him, or run to him for comfort. Finally, when Finn screamed her name one last time, she snapped out of her grief-stricken trance enough to run towards Ochi's ship.

* * *

All Kylo could do was stare at Rey's retreating figure in shock. But he wasn't upset with this new outcome. That terrifying power, it was from the _Sith._ Rey had used power from the Dark side. She was almost ready to turn.

Then, he thought of her gut-wrenching cry. So it had been the Wookie she was trying to save. His father's first-mate, and best friend, Chewbacca. He waited for the satisfaction of his death to hit him, but it never came. He felt hollow inside, and despite his efforts, he couldn't help but remember that there was a time when he had called the Wookie, Uncle Chewie. His chest tightened and he clenched his fists as he stared at the burning debris of the ruined transport.


	20. Kijimi

**Kijimi**

"They're everywhere," Poe said, hurrying back to his friends. They heard a cry behind them and they turned around to see stormtroopers hauling a family out of their home and throwing them roughly to the ground. Light flashed off of the trooper's armor, and a spotlight illuminated a terrified girl being brought to her knees as she screamed helplessly. Rey's heart twisted and a wave of cold anger crawled up her spine as she could only watch the scene unfold. She wanted to make those troopers pay, to make them suffer. But then Poe's voice broke Rey's trance.

"Alright," he said. "I know what we should do."

"So do I!" C-3PO said behind them. "We should leave."

"Clam it, 3PO!" Poe retorted, clearly annoyed. But Rey could sympathize with the droid, he only had their best interests at heart, even if he was incredibly annoying at times. Rey shivered even with a large coat wrapped tightly around her shoulders and a thick hood covering her head. Her hand that was clutching her quarterstaff was numb. All her life, she had grown up in the desert where it was scorching hot all the time. Kijimi's frigid atmosphere was new to her, although Poe seemed completely at ease.

"Follow me," he said with such an easy and casual confidence that Rey found herself wondering, again, how Poe knew this place so well. But she trusted him, so she didn't say anything. D-O closely followed BB-8, his wheel squeaking so loudly that it made Rey wince. She hoped the other sounds around them would drown it out.

Their small group hurried through the streets and stayed close to the wall in order to not draw attention to themselves. Poe looked out from behind the corner.

"Alright, let's head down this wa-" Poe was cut off when he heard a sharp click and felt the pressure of a blaster against his skull. Poe closed his eyes and berated himself for not being more careful. He didn't dare try to see who his attacker was until a chillingly familiar female voice rang through his ears.

"Heard you were spotted at Monk's Gate," she said, coldly, her voice filtered through a modulator in her helmet. She continued and said, "I thought, _he's not stupid enough to come back here_."

"Oh, you'd be surprised," Poe remarked without humor. Finn and Rey had rushed to catch up with him, but they stopped when they saw the blaster against Poe's head. Poe noticed how Rey's hand tightened around her quarterstaff, and he hoped she wouldn't do anything reckless.

"Who's this?" Rey asked with a worried expression on her face.

"What's going on?" Finn added, glaring at Poe's attacker.

"Guys, this is Zorii," Poe said. "Zorii, this is Rey and Finn-"

"I could pull this trigger right now," Zorii interrupted.

Poe nodded grimly. "I've seen you do worse."

"For a lot less," Zorii snapped.

"Can we just, uh, talk about this?" Poe asked tentatively as he slowly lowered his hood and turned to face her. He could see his reflection in the visor of her helmet, her maroon flight suit stood out against the white snow, her twin blasters gleaming in the light.

Zorii ignored him. "I wanna see your brains in the snow."

Poe winced and said, "So, you're still mad?" Her helmet tilted down as if she couldn't believe he was asking her that. Poe could almost see her roll her eyes.

"Zorii," Poe said. "We could really use your help. We gotta crack this droid's head open, and fast."

"Pardon me?" 3PO's indignant voice cut through the air, but Poe ignored him as he looked at Zorii with a pleading expression on his face.

"We're trying to find Babu Frik," he said.

"Babu?" Zorii scoffed. "Babu only works for the crew." Her voice turned icy. "That's not _you_ anymore."

"What 'crew'?" Rey asked.

"Oh, funny he never mentioned it," Zorii said, sarcastically. Poe tried to shake his head and opened his mouth to protest but Zorii had already spoken.

"Your friend's old job was running spice."

Poe grimaced. _Here it comes_, he thought. Finn looked at him in shock.

"You were a spice runner?" he asked, sounding incredulous.

"You were a stormtrooper?" Poe retorted.

"Were you a spice runner?" Rey added, surprise on her face.

"Were you a scavenger? We could do this all night!"

"We don't have all night," Zorii snapped. She walked in front of him but kept her blaster trained on Poe's head. "You know, I'm still digging out of the hole you put me in when you left to join the Resistance." Her voice was angry, bitter even. Then, her gaze trained on Rey.

"You," she said, her blaster shifting to point at Rey. "Bounty for her just might cover us." Zorii looked at the group of armed thugs that she had brought with her and yelled, "Djak'kankah!"

Poe shook his head and protested, "Don't Djak'kankah!" But Rey was already moving. She swung her staff to knock Zorii's blaster out of her hand and took down the thugs behind her with ease.

Finn moved backward and grimaced. "Ooh!"

He moved his arms in front of Poe and 3PO protectively and quickly shuffled backward, out of the reach of Rey's staff. D-O was looking around in confusion, not quite understanding what was going on.

Rey swung her staff and Zorii fell to the ground, quickly drawing her other blaster. But Rey was faster and before anyone could blink, her lightsaber was pointed at Zorii's neck. Poe hid a smile as he looked at Zorii and Rey. He could practically see Zorii's scowl as she came to the realization that she'd been beaten.

"We could really use your help," Rey said, her voice kind and non-threatening despite the fact that she was still holding her lightsaber. "Please," she added. Both women stared at each other for a bit, breathing hard from the exertion. Finally, Zori broke the silence.

"Not that you care," Zorii said with a hint of grudging respect and admiration. "But I think you're ok." She lowered her blaster and Poe and Finn exhaled a sigh of relief. Rey gave her a small smile.

"I care," she said. She switched off her lightsaber and then held out her hand to Zorii. Zorii took it and Rey helped pull her up. Zorii gave a slight nod of respect and recognition for the woman in front of her. Zorii respected her for the fact that she was independently badass and capable, and that she had no problem with showing it. Rey nodded back with a smile and then struggled to hold in a laugh when she saw Finn and Poe looking at them in confusion.

After a bit, Zorii led them past the streets, and away from what seemed like millions of troopers coming from every direction.

"Walkers," Zorii said. "Stay close by."

"Poe Dameron, spice runner," Finn said with a grin on his face. Poe just rolled his eyes. "Runner of spice," Finn continued.

"Alright," Poe said, exasperated.

"Get your spice!" Finn teased as they climbed a small set of stairs.

"Come on, 3PO!" Rey called to the protocol droid who was lagging behind the group.

"Oh!" 3PO's reply faded into the wind as the group advanced. What they didn't see, is that as they passed a stone archway, the heavy clank of boots echoed through the tunnel as the Knights of Ren emerged, their eyes trained on the empty street.

* * *

Kylo exited the interrogation room, fists clenched tightly. He was still shaken from the interaction with the Wookie. He hadn't been prepared to see all of those memories that he'd tried to bury for so long as he tried to find Rey. His chest had tightened and he still felt incredibly unstable. Again, he was surprised that he took no joy in the Wookie's pain, leaving that hollow sensation in his chest. It unsettled him but he tried not to let it show. Allegiant General Pryde, General Hux, and Admiral Griss walked behind him as they strode down the corridor.

"Report, General Pryde," Kylo commanded, forcing his voice to remain steady.

"There's been a development, sir," the General's said. Kylo paused as he turned to acknowledge the man. "The Knights of Ren have tracked the scavenger."

"To a settlement called Kijimi," Admiral Griss added.

Hux then cut in and asked, "Shall we destroy the city, Supreme-" Kylo stopped the General from going any further and stuck a gloved finger in his face to shut him up. Irritation and anger rose up in him and Hux fell silent as the words died in his throat. Then he realized that he wasn't angry because it was Hux, although that was often the case. It was the fact that Hux had wanted to destroy the city with Rey _in _it. He froze for a moment before trying to clear his head, but it was no use, the thought had already dominated his mind. Kylo briskly turned away and walked down the corridor alone.

Pryde and Griss looked at Hux with raised eyebrows, and Hux clenched his jaw to avoid saying anything but his hatred for the Supreme Leader increased with every passing moment. He really hated that man.

* * *

Meanwhile, as soon as Rey had realized that Chewie was alive, relief flooded through her. She hadn't killed him after all! It helped balance her sadness and guilt about C-3PO's memory being erased. And she knew that it had been painful for Poe to say goodbye to Zorii, _again_. Finn had comforted Poe and hugged his friend tightly. Rey watched the two men and smiled. However, the smile slipped off her face when her thoughts turned to Chewie. She desperately hoped that he was ok. And poor 3PO, he would never be the same as before. Then her breath caught. She hoped Kylo wasn't still on the ship. He would find them almost instantly. But then Rey felt his familiar Force signature going down to Kijimi and she sighed in relief.

So as Kylo flew down to Kijimi, Rey and the others landed Ochi's ship in the _Steadfast_'s hanger. Two stormtroopers approached the landing ramp.

"Credentials and manifes-" the troopers were cut off and they let out a cry as Finn and Poe blasted them. Blaster fire began shooting all around the hanger, but Rey, Finn, and Poe quickly dispatched of the troopers.

Rey looked at the three droids trying to follow them. "You three stay there!"

"Happily!" 3PO said anxiously, even though BB-8 let out a stubborn beep.

"Which way?" Poe asked Finn, as he was the former stormtrooper. "You used to be on these things, right?"

Finn looked around and hesitated. "Uh, no idea," he said. "Follow me!" He ran towards the end of the hanger and thought, _That looks like a helpful door, right?_

The trio soon found themselves sneaking around the hallways, blasters raised, trying to make as little noise as possible. As they crept around a corner, a sudden _clang _of a door opening made them glance backward. When they turned around, Finn and Poe quickly raised their blasters as the two troopers in front of them raised theirs.

"Drop your weapons!" a trooper said. Rey quickly stepped in front of Finn and Poe and waved her hand, and instilled a sense of calm in her voice.

"It's ok that we're here," she said, and a nervewracking beat of silence hung in the air before the troopers' arms relaxed.

"It's ok that you're here," the first trooper said.

"It's good," the second one added. Finn and Poe looked at each other in confusion.

"Rey waved her hand again and said, "You're _relieved _that we're here."

"Thank goodness you're here," the trooper said, his shoulders sagging with relief.

"Welcome, guys," the second trooper said as he lowered his gun.

Poe leaned over to Finn and whispered, "Does she do that to us?" Finn shrugged nervously. Rey dismissed the idea that she would do that to them. She would never-no, wait... She would. She definitely would. If it meant protecting them, she'd do it in a heartbeat.

"We're looking for a prisoner," Rey said. "And his belongings." The troopers cheerfully gave them instructions on where to find Chewie and continued on with their day. Finn and Poe looked at each other both impressed, confused, and a little nervous. They both shrugged and followed Rey.

They burst into a corridor, and Rey's eyes flitted upwards.

"The cameras," she said, and she and Poe quickly shot them.

"They said Chewie's this way," Finn called as he and Poe rushed to the panel of the door in front of them. Rey started to follow them, but then she felt a sharp tug in her gut, pulling her in the opposite direction. She turned around and a strange feeling came over her.

"Rey, come on," Finn said.

"The dagger's on this ship," Rey said, almost to herself. "We need it."

"Why?" Poe's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. She turned around slowly, lost in thought.

"A feeling," she answered. "I'll meet you back at the hanger," she said before running off down the hallway across from her.

"Rey, you can't just-" Finn said, but Poe put a hand on his chest to stop him from following her.

"Chewie," Poe reminded him firmly. Finn tore his gaze away from where Rey had disappeared and nodded grimly.

* * *

Snow continued to fall on Kijimi as Kylo addressed his Knights.

"Search the city again," he ordered. The Knights nodded and immediately spread back out to resume their hunt. Kylo turned and murmured to himself, "She's close." He continued walking, and he reached out to the Force to find her bright Force signature, she was practically a glowing beacon of light. _Rey_… The single word left his mind and he reached out as far as he could in an effort to locate her. At this point, it was only a matter of time…

* * *

Finn and Poe burst through the door and they heaved a sigh of relief when they saw Chewie. Chewie roared as the two rushed towards him.

"Of course we came for you, Chewie!" Poe said as Finn unlocked the chains. Chewie roared in what seemed to be gratitude and affection.

"Yeah, Rey's here, she's gonna get the dagger," Finn said as he and Poe hauled Chewie out of the pit. The three hurried out of the interrogation chamber to make their way towards the hanger.

"Ship's this way," Finn said. "Follow me." Finn turned a corner, only to run into a group of stormtroopers.

"Over here!" a trooper yelled. Finn quickly shot the trooper and then blasted the door shut.

"Wrong way!" he shouted.

"There's not really a right way, is there?" Poe asked as he ran in the opposite direction. A laser blast struck the wall in a flurry of yellow sparks next to Poe's head and he ducked behind the wall for cover. When he turned around, he quickly shot one of the troopers, and Finn shot the other. As they ran past the fallen troopers, Poe slid one of their blasters to Chewie. Chewie grabbed it and promptly shot two troopers behind them. Poe grinned, the Wookie never missed.

The next few minutes were a whirlwind of chaos and blaster fire as he, Finn, and Chewie ran down the halls, shooting troopers left and right.

"Are we close?" Poe yelled over his shoulder.

"Straight ahead!" Finn shouted, turning to shoot at the troopers behind them. Poe took the lead and rushed ahead.

"Halt!" a trooper's voice yelled. Poe turned half a second too late. He groaned in pain as a laser blast struck him in his left arm, falling to the ground. Chewie roared and Finn turned around, his eyes widening in horror.

"POE!" he screamed and he ran toward his friend. He crouched down next to him to help him up and winced when he saw Poe's arm. "Are you ok?" he quickly asked, his voice worried. Clutching his arm, Poe looked up but then his eyes widened.

"Nope," he groaned and Finn lifted his head. They were surrounded by stormtroopers.

"You, there!" one of them said. "Hands up!"

"Drop your weapons, now!" another added.

"Put your weapons down!" Finn looked around and saw the blasters trained at their heads. There was no way out of this, not this time. His hand was still clenching his blaster, though.

When he didn't move, another trooper ordered, "Drop them!" His blaster was aimed at Finn's head. Finn glared at them defiantly. "Drop them, now!" Finn was tempted to blast them and tell the bucket heads to go to hell, but when he saw Poe breathing heavily and wincing in pain, he paused. Finn gritted his teeth and threw his blaster down angrily and Chewie did the same.

Poe looked up and around them and said, "Hey, fellas."

"Shut up, scum," a female trooper said. She sounded so much like Phasma that Finn's blood boiled with rage as he glared at her. Chewie roared in frustration and then Finn suddenly remembered Rey. He hoped she was doing better than they were, at least then they might have a chance.

* * *

***Author's Note: Ok, this didn't have much Reylo in it but it was super fun to write the other characters, especially Zorii. I left out the part where 3PO gets his memory wiped because it felt a bit redundant at that point, and I didn't want to write every single scene lmao. Next chapter is the Star Destroyer bond. I hope you guys enjoyed! :D**


	21. Lineage

**Lineage**

**Disclaimer: There is a strong swear word that has been censored ***

Light. That was Rey's first thought when she entered Kylo Ren's quarters. Almost everything was white, the lights cast a faint blue cast on the shiny surfaces. It was as if everything had been meticulously cleaned and tidied so not a speck of dust was out of place.

Rey didn't find _that _surprising but she was surprised by his choice of color. It was very different from his old quarters, and _him, _in general. She had glimpsed his surroundings at some point during one of their sessions, or she had at least seen his bed which was entirely black, which seemed to be his motif for clothing, as well. Well, except when he wasn't fully clothed when his fair skin contrasted sharply against-Rey's cheeks burned when she realized where her thoughts were going. She tried to clear her head, but to no avail, the memories of all the times she had seen him shirtless-which happened quite a bit, now that she thought about it-were flashing through her mind.

It was broken quickly by a _cold _sensation that ran down her spine and spread throughout her limbs. She suddenly found it very difficult to move, as if her body was weighed down by lead, but she forced her head to turn behind her. Her eyes widened and her breath caught. She slowly approached the dais as her eyes fell on the helmet of Darth Vader. Darkness emanated from it and Rey could feel the temperature around her drop noticeably as she got closer. She was strangely drawn to it, but she planted her feet and refused to move. This had been Kylo's grandfather, one of the most powerful and feared Sith lords in history. Reality came back to her and she turned away from the mask.

She caught sight of Chewie's bowcaster and the dagger. She hurried to the desk and let her staff rest against the edge. Her hands made quick work of the strap to the beige bag she carried and she began to put the items inside. But when she touched the dagger, she hesitated.

Rey's fingers gripped the handle tightly as she picked it up, the cold metal glistening hungrily in the light. Memories of her vision came rushing back to her.

She could hear a woman screaming, shortly followed by a much younger voice. The sound of the ship's engines was drowned out by the little girl's screams, begging them not to abandon her. "_No!"_

"No…" Rey whispered as the memories became too much for her to bear. It was as if missing pieces of a puzzle were slowly falling into place. Rey had always wanted to know what happened to her parents, but now she felt her stomach sink. Maybe it was better if she didn't know…

"Rey."

Rey instantly whirled around and ignited her lightsaber on instinct. She felt the rush of all the familiar symptoms as they enveloped her entire being. A prickling sensation at the base of her skull, the tremor in the Force, the vacuum of sound, and the slight echos.

Kylo Ren stared back at her, his mask hiding any indication of his emotions. His boots were muddy and she could see the snow on his cape. He was on Kijimi, she realized. He must have just missed her.

At first, Rey had been trembling, her fear taking over her. But now that she'd had a moment to process, her anger returned swiftly and vehemently.

"Wherever you are," Kylo said, "you are hard to find," His voice held a touch of amusement and sarcasm that suddenly reminded Rey of Han. Pain twisted in her chest before her anger came back to hide it.

"You're hard to get rid of," she snapped. She began to turn away from him. She could _not _let herself get distracted. Not now.

"I pushed you in the desert because I needed to see it," he said in that infuriatingly calm voice of his. "I needed _you _to see it. Who you are." A beat of silence hung in the air as the echos of his voice reflected between them. "I know the rest of your story." Rey kept her back to him, so he couldn't see her face. So she couldn't see _him_. Her hand gripped her lightsaber so hard that the ridges were digging into her palm, her knuckles turning white. She _hated _that he knew more than her, that he could tempt her with this. The temptation of him by himself was bad enough, it tormented her every day. Rey didn't want to be at his mercy.

"Rey…" His voice had sunken dangerously low. Rey whirled around to face him, brandishing her lightsaber.

"You're lying," she hissed through clenched teeth. Her vision blurred with angry tears and her voice was shaking. He just looked at her calmly.

"I never lied to you," he said, softly. Maybe he hadn't, but didn't his words always have some other meaning behind it?

_Not all of them, _his voice spoke in her head. Her eyes widened and she realized that she had lowered her mental barriers. Before she could shut him out, he showed her what he meant. Most of his words were honest, genuine even. What surprised her where the subtle remarks, actions, glances, and everything where they had felt that _tension _between them or those awkward moments of intimacy that made them want to pull away and come closer to each other at the same time. All of those held no trace of deception, just raw and honest vulnerability.

Rey stood still, stunned for a moment as the memories flashed through her head. Then she snapped out of it and threw her mental walls up, shoving him out of her mind. _Get out of my head! _

He was walking towards her, and it was as somehow, he was in the room with her.

"Your parents _were _no one. They _chose _to be," he said, out loud this time. "To keep you safe."

"_Don't!" _Rey seethed. Her voice was tight, strained, and her face twisted with pain that got worse as every second passed. She was trying so hard to bury her emotions, but she could feel them rising to the surface, ready to explode. Her chin was trembling, her hands shaking, and her eyes watering.

"You remember more than you say," Kylo continued, ignoring her pleas. "I've been in your head."

"I don't want this!" She was reminded of Snoke's throne room but was a different kind of heartbreak. So much anger and rage came along with the pain this time. If only he would just stop.

"Search your memories," he said, and then Rey snapped.

"NO!" she screamed and while she was still holding the dagger, she swung her lightsaber towards him. He dodged once and then ignited his own but only to parry her strike. The crackling red blade hissed as it met her blue one. She pushed with all of her strength but he was as unyielding as a mountain, using his physical size to his advantage.

She glared at his helmet, where his eyes would be. The angry, broken, red lines of his mask reminded her of blood, and suddenly her thoughts turned to the dagger. She was beginning to realize that _someone's _blood was on that dagger.

"Remember them," Kylo said. "_See_ them." Rey gasped as a vision filled her mind.

A beautiful woman with a blue hood over her head ran into a tent holding a child in her arms, just like her vision on Ajan Kloss. She was beautiful, but it was obvious that she was terrified, attempting to be strong for the little girl in her arms. As her hood fell back, Rey could see that the woman's brown hair was tied up in the same way as Rey's. Rey was nearly a spitting image of the woman, except Rey had freckles, and her jaw was sharper. _Mother? _

"I know," she murmured as she hugged her child tightly, tears leaking out of the corners of her eyes. She took the girl's face in her hands. "Rey, be brave," she said, and pulled her back into a desperate hug, crying as she rocked back and forth. Rey saw herself hug her mother back, her younger self not fully aware of what was happening.

Then, a man came inside the tent. His hair was lighter, and he had a light stubble on his face. _Father? _Her father's blue eyes were filled with tears as he knelt next to them. Rey could see her lips and her jaw in him and it felt like her heart was breaking all over again when she noticed that her father had the same crinkle between his eyebrows as she did when she got scared.

"You'll be safe here," he said, rubbing the girl's back, looking at her with an overwhelming sense of love and devotion. "I promise." He hugged her and her mother tightly.

Then the hauntingly familiar image of Ochi's ship taking her parents from her filled her mind. She heard herself screaming, "Come back! No!"

Her vision cleared and she was back on the _Steadfast_, her lightsaber locked with Kylo's. She flung his blade away and tried to put as much distance between them as possible. She was still reeling from the vision, as they circled each other. Rey could feel the cold air on her skin and saw the snowflakes hiss as the neared her blade. The ground underneath her changed from smooth tile to rocky earth. Even though she couldn't see it, she was on Kijimi with him.

"They sold you to protect you," he said.

"Stop talking!" Rey shouted.

"Rey, I know what happened to them." His voice was steady and unwavering, and it only infuriated her more. Rey yelled fiercely and suddenly they were back in his quarters, as she swung her saber towards him again. She felt her saber hit something and then blood-red berries spilled out of nowhere onto… Kylo's floor? It was as if they were in the same space, despite the fact that they were in different locations. Separate, but together... Before she could think much of it, Kylo drove her saber into the ground.

She pulled her blade free and swung at him again and again. It infuriated her that he was doing nothing to attack her. Just doing the bare minimum to keep her at bay.

"Tell me where you are," he said. "You don't know the whole story." Rey ignored him and he was forced to parry, again. Because of her fury, Rey's strikes were sloppy and uncontrolled, so her momentum pushed her forward farther than she had meant to go and she stumbled into Kijimi. She quickly regained her balance and turned around to face him.

"It was Palpatine who had your parents taken," he said as he turned to face her again. His voice lowered ominously. "He was looking for _you_. But they wouldn't say where you were." They were back in his quarters again. "So he gave the order."

Rey's chest was heaving, trying to get air into her lungs but another vision filled her mind. Black-eyed Ochi, carrying the dagger that Rey held, stood before her parents on his ship.

"She isn't on Jakku, she's gone," her mother said, determinedly. Ochi's face held no expression before Rey heard the horrifying sound of the dagger plunging into her father's gut.

"NO!" the horrified scream of her mother lingered in Rey's ears as Rey was forced to watch her father die. Her mother backed away quickly but there was nowhere to go. Her screams of terror and anguish were suddenly cut short as Ochi stabbed her, too, murdering Rey's mother.

"NO!" Rey screamed as the horrifying images replayed in her head over and over. She swung wildly towards Kylo in blind rage and pain. Rey let out a yell as their sabers collided and suddenly they cut through the black pedestal that held Darth Vader's helmet. The pieces were glowing, red-hot from their blades as they exploded across the room. The helmet fell, too, but instead of landing on the floor, it vanished.

Kylo looked down, presumably at the mask, and said, "So that's where you are." Fueled by her anger, Rey swung her saber again and again until it locked with Kylo's.

"You know why the Emperor's always wanted you dead?" he said, red and blue light reflecting off his helmet.

"No," Rey whispered, as a horrifying possibility began to surface.

She could hear the satisfaction in his voice as he said, "I'll come tell you." And just like that, he was gone, leaving Rey alone with the black remains of the pedestal strewn across the floor. Her breathing was loud and it felt like she couldn't get enough air into her lungs. She was reeling from what had just happened and then she stumbled backward as she realized what she had done. Kylo knew where she and her friends were. Kriff, she had let her emotions damn her and her friends again.

As she rushed to grab Chewie's things, she remembered the dagger in her hand. The metal was still cold, and it seemed to taunt her. This had been the blade that had killed her parents, murdered her family. Rey wanted to melt into the floor and cry, but then she remembered her friends, she remembered Leia. Shoving the dagger into her bag, she sprinted for the hangar as fast as she could.

* * *

Finn, Poe, and Chewie stood in a line in the execution room. Finn recognized it instantly. He had always hoped that he would never be assigned to execution duty, and he remembered his comrades weren't too fond of it either. He hated feeling helpless, and it stung even more so at the hands of Hux. Ugh, he hated that man. Finn heard the whine of the blasters as they charged up, ready to kill. He braced himself but then a nasal voice cut in.

"Actually," Hux said. "I'd like to do this myself." Finn could hear the contempt dripping from his voice, and Finn fought the urge to roll his eyes. A stormtrooper handed his blaster over. So this is how he would die. At least he was among friends. He didn't have any regrets, wait, no, he had one. He wished he had been able to talk to Rey one last time. He had been starting to feel things, her presence, and others. He hoped that she was ok.

Poe looked at Finn and then leaned over and whispered, "What were you going to tell Rey, before?" Finn shot him a look with a raised eyebrow.

"You still on that?"

Poe turned to glare at him.

"Oh, I'm sorry, is this a bad time?" he asked, sarcastically. Chewie roared that he was going to die hungry but Poe and Finn were too busy arguing to notice.

"Yeah, it sort of is a bad time," Finn retorted.

"Oh, I guess later is a much better option, right?"

Finn rolled his eyes as Poe continued, faintly aware of the blaster powering up behind them.

Poe continued, "I mean if you want to get something off your chest, maybe now is not the _worst_ time to-"

The blaster went off, once, twice, three times. Finn, Poe, and Chewie all flinched, but they opened their eyes a second later, and they weren't dead. Confused, they turned around and their jaws dropped.

The stormtroopers lay dead at their feet, their armor smoking. And their savior was none other than..._Hux_?

He straightened, still clutching the blaster, and said, "I'm the spy."

"_WHAT?" _Poe shouted in utter shock.

"_YOU?" _Finn exclaimed, and Chewie roared his confusion behind them, too.

"We don't have much time," Hux said.

Poe paused for a moment and then stuck his finger in Hux's face, grinning.

"_I knew it!"_

Finn looked at him incredulously and said, "No, you did not!"

* * *

Rey sprinted into the hangar and caught sight of a stormtrooper questioning C-3PO. For an instant, she was glad of the droid's memory wipe.

"What's your operating number?" the trooper was asking.

"Ich ee a da wan da blip-" 3PO responded with a series of random sounds.

"That's not even a language!" the trooper said. Before he could say anything else, a blast hit him from behind. Rey fired Chewie's bowcaster until all the troopers were dead. Han was right, she thought with a sad smile, the bowcaster was an _excellent_ weapon.

"Oh, dear!" 3PO said. "My first laser battle!" Rey hurried over to the golden droid and quickly handed him Chewie's bowcaster.

"Where are the others?" she asked, quickly.

"They haven't come back!"

Rey's eyes were pulled away from the droid and she squinted against the bright lights of the hangar. The roar of a TIE fighter filled her ears and her blood chilled when she realized that it was Kylo Ren's ship landing. Kriff!

"Find them!" she said, frantically handing all of her things to 3PO. "Go!" Once she was sure that the droids were safely on their way, she turned back to the roar of the engines, to Kylo Ren.

* * *

"Friends ahead!" D-O said, eagerly. BB-8 beeped excitedly in agreement.

"Oh, yes!" 3PO exclaimed. "There they are!"

Poe caught sight of the droids and breathed a sigh of relief.

"BB-8, come on!" he shouted.

"I shut down the impeders, you've got seconds!" Hux said as he opened the door to the hangar. Chewie and the droids hurried through the entryway, but not without a growl from Chewie towards the red-headed general. It took every bit of Hux's self-control not to flinch. Poe paused for a moment to look at the _Millenium Falcon._

"There she is," he said, with a smile. "She's a survivor." Finn went to follow, but Hux stopped him.

"Wait! Blast me in the arm. Quick!" he said.

Finn gave him a look of confusion. "What?"

"Or they'll know," Hux explained and then Finn realized what he was saying. He raised his blaster and the idea of killing him was tempting. He had done horrible things to Finn, to his friends, and Finn knew that _Hux _had been the one to order the Hosnian system destroyed. He hated him, but Finn didn't like killing. He didn't even enjoy Phasma falling from the burning deck of the _Supremacy_. Finn aimed his blaster at Hux's arm but then decided if he wasn't going to kill him, he _was _going to make this hurt. At the last second, he lowered his blaster and shot him in the leg.

Hux shouted in pain as he fell to the floor.

Finn kept his blaster trained on him before asking, "Why are you helping us?" Hux hated the Resistance, hated him and his friends. All of it.

Hux gave him a condescending sneer and said, "I don't care if you win." He spat through the pain and continued. "I need Kylo Ren to lose."

* * *

Kylo sensed her as he stepped out of his ship. She was like a beacon. He remembered after the Bond had closed, he had ordered the stormtroopers to ready his ship, not even bothering with the mask. Rey was more important. He wondered why she had been in his quarters, it did something strange to him. It weirdly excited him, but he couldn't dwell on it for long.

He could see her slim figure in the distance, her white wrappings blowing in the wind. His boots were heavy on the floor, while her steps where light. He could feel the pounding of her heart, or was it his? He couldn't tell anymore.

Rey's heart was pounding in her chest, and she was vaguely aware of a crowd of stormtroopers forming behind them as if to watch. But she didn't take her eyes off Kylo. She couldn't look anywhere else. It was as if his gaze was a magnet pulling her close to him. Rey consciously had to stop herself from going to him. Instead, they circled each other, neither one backing down.

Eventually, they stopped where Rey's back was to the open hangar door, with Kylo in front of her. She wished he wouldn't wear the damned mask. It was just a front for him and they both knew it. Rey studied the red cracks in the metal and thought it ironic that he was the one saying to kill the past, and yet here he was, trying to literally piece it back together.

Kylo looked at Rey, he watched as loose strands of her hair danced across her cheeks, he studied her face that was bathed in blue light. He hadn't been this close to her in person for a long time. Without any barriers between them. He studied her right cheek and looked at the small scar again that cut a small divot in her skin. He remembered noticing it when they had seen each other last before Pasaana.

"Why did the Emperor come for me?" Rey's voice cut through the air and echoed across the hangar. She nearly flinched at how loud it seemed, everything else was so quiet. Rey swallowed hard and continued. "Why did he want to kill a child?" She stared at Kylo with a pleading expression on her face. "Tell me." Rey hated that her voice shook, and she clenched her fists in an attempt to steady herself. She just wanted an explanation, a confirmation, even though she suspected that she already knew.

"Because he saw what you would become," Kylo said, his voice low and steady. "You don't just have power," he said, and Rey felt her blood go cold. She knew what he was going to say. "You have _his _power. You're his granddaughter." Kylo paused before delivering the devastating final blow. "You," he said, "are a Palpatine."

Rey felt all the air leave her lungs, her blood froze, her limbs filled with lead, and she felt as if she had just taken a blaster bolt to the chest. She stumbled back slightly, nearly falling to the ground. Her breath came in rapid pants, her eyes were wide with horror, and her heart was beating so fast it felt like her chest was going to burst. Kylo began to step toward her.

"My mother was the daughter of Vader," he said softly. "Your father was the son of the Emperor." Kylo stared at her face, at her shocked expression, and then continued. "What Palpatine doesn't know, is we're a dyad in the Force, Rey." He could see her body freeze at that word, as he felt a similar chill go through him. It had taken him a long time to figure out what their Bond was, but when he had discovered it, it made so much sense, and it felt so right. He looked at her again, this time her eyes meeting his. "Two that are one."

Rey felt as if every nerve in her body had been stimulated when he said _dyad_. It was as if that single word was the missing piece of a puzzle she had been looking for all of her life. Something clicked in her, something felt so right about it. It made so much sense, why they could be in perfect sync at times, their connections, everything. But it was terrifying, too. She was still reeling with the reveal of her lineage, and now she had to process this, too.

It was as if an electric current ran through her entire body, and somehow she knew that Kylo had felt it, too. For a moment, she forgot about the stormtroopers watching. She forgot about the Resistance and the First Order. She forgot about the Sith and the Jedi. Right now, the only things in the world were her and Kylo, a _dyad_. It was as if she had forgotten how to breathe, how to think, how to speak.

She glanced behind her to meet the gaping void above Kijimi. It was too far down, maybe. But she felt frozen in place. Her lips were parted in shock as she drew shaky breaths, and she realized that her body was unconsciously beginning to lean towards him.

"We'll kill him. Together," he said, his voice was softer, quieter. "And take the throne." Rey allowed herself to consider it, just for a moment. Whenever they were together, the Force seemed to amplify around them. When they had fought together in Snoke's throne room, the power that they felt had been electrifying. Together, they were nearly unstoppable and capable of astonishing feats.

Rey heard the hissing sound of the release on his mask. He lifted his mask off, a gesture of vulnerability, and trust, that he reserved solely for her. Her chest tightened when she saw his face. On the outside, it looked unbreakable, unyielding. But she knew better. She knew him better than anyone. Rey could see the conflict and desperation in his eyes. His raven locks of hair had grown longer since she'd last seen him like this, and the scar had faded slightly. But his eyes, his soul-piercing, devastating eyes were the same. Her breath caught as she stared into his gaze. Usually, she would have been able to avoid getting lost by now. But she was distracted, and his eyes had her caught in his grasp.

"You know what you need to do," Kylo said. He was only a few feet away from her, now. "You know." Once again, he held his gloved hand out to her. Her gaze flickered to his hand, then back up to his eyes. Kylo looked at her face and he realized that she was wearing the same expression she'd had when he had asked her to join him on the _Supremacy. _It was the same look she held in their various moments of intimacy and electrifying closeness, just before she would pull away. Conflict, sadness, confusion, longing.

Rey felt her heart twist painfully as she regarded his outstretched hand. She didn't want to take it but at the same time, right now she needed someone. To help process all of this. But the one person who could, the one person that she wanted, was the one standing in front of her, asking her to do the impossible.

Rey felt torn back and forth until she felt a familiar presence behind her, and she could hear the faint roar of engines. The _Falcon_.

She looked at Kylo, and said, "I do." Rey turned and squinted against the roar and the blinding blue light of the _Falcon_'s engines. Stormtroopers began firing, laser blasts flying by her. She could sense Poe spin the ship around as he hit the thrusters, sending everything in the hangar flying backward. Stormtroopers, ships, and crates alike toppled over.

Rey braced herself, and she could feel Kylo doing the same behind her. Then she saw Finn on the landing ramp, wearing a breather.

"Rey! C'mon!" Finn shouted. Rey spun to look at Kylo one last time, feeling a strange, but familiar pull in her gut. She was going to go with her friends, but some part of her just wanted so badly to be with him. A _dyad _…

Wrenching herself away, Rey turned and ran to the edge of the hangar, her hair whipping her face. She called on the Force and leaped out, caught Finn's arm, and swung onto the ramp safely on the _Falcon_. Once inside, while Finn went to go check on Poe, Rey collapsed to the ground and slumped against the wall. The shock of everything was catching up with her and her whole body was trembling. Her breaths were shaky and her heartbeat was erratic. Allowing herself one moment of privacy, she pulled her knees up to her chest, buried her face in her arms, and cried.

* * *

Kylo Ren surveyed the destruction and carnage around the hangar. The losses they'd suffered were small prices to pay to see Rey again. Kylo's helmet was back on, and his gaze was fixed on where Rey had stood. He kept seeing her face, her reaction when he'd told her the truth. Her small body had been bathed in a blue light that seemed to radiate from her. Her hair had been whipping around her face in the wind of the atmosphere, with her wide hazel eyes and her parted lips. He could see the desire in her face, he could _feel_ it. When he'd said _dyad_, the way she reacted had told him that. She had frozen, but he had seen the recognition and realization that washed over her face. Her body had begun to subconsciously lean toward him. Bathed in the halo of blue light, she looked like an angel, she was beautiful.

Thinking of this, Kylo realized that he could no longer deny the pull, the _attraction_ he felt for the scavenger. It had always been there, but it was increasing in intensity each time he saw her. The Bond between them was powerful, but he knew not all of his feelings were only because of the Bond. He felt _something _for her, he knew that much. And he knew that she felt something for him, too, even if she tried to deny it. He knew her better than anyone, and he knew that she was trying to deny it, trying to escape her feelings. He could see it in her face, in her eyes, in her mind.

He turned and went to prepare to go to Kef Bir, where the dagger had said. As he walked, he clenched his fists in anger. If the damned _Millenium Falcon_ hadn't shown up, she may have taken his hand. Damn it.

Kylo really hated that f*cking ship.

* * *

**Author's Note: Haha, this was a long one! I really liked the dyad part in TROS and I had a lot of fun writing Rey and Kylo's reactions. But not as much fun as I had writing the scenes with Hux omg those were so funny in the movie XD. Hehehe, Dark Rey is next!**


	22. Don't Be Afraid Of Who You Are

**Don't Be Afraid Of Who You Are**

Disclaimer: I am changing the rating of this story to T for language because there have already been several strong swears and I use it often enough. Everything else is the same, though. So the T is only for language purposes.

* * *

Rey's hands gripped the metal structure of the Death Star as she climbed. Her feet searched for footholds as she felt her way around the metal. Rey jumped across chasms, dug her fingers into the rusting metal, and hauled herself over the edge of the wreckage. Rey paused for a moment to catch her breath. The last time she'd done something like this, it had been on Jakku inside the Star Destroyer _Inflictor_. When she was a scavenger.

While Rey did not miss life on Jakku, things were much simpler then. She wasn't going after hidden Sith artifacts that would lead to the planet that held the supposedly dead Emperor, she hadn't known she was a Palpatine, and she wouldn't be this conflicted about her feelings. But she may not have discovered the Force, she wouldn't have found a family in the Resistance, wouldn't have met all of her friends, Finn, Poe, Rose, BB-8, Chewie, she wouldn't have discovered mentors like Han, Luke, and Leia. And perhaps the biggest thing that wouldn't have happened, would be that she never met Ben. Or was it Kylo?

The thing that she hated the most was her mass of confused and conflicted feelings. The pull to the dark side was terrifying, but it was more terrifying to dwell on her feelings for Kylo, for Ben. She hated the conflict she felt, but she couldn't imagine life without him. They were a _dyad_. Two halves of one whole. Rey had attempted to convince herself that she hated him, that he hated her, that they were enemies, but the scary thing was that she couldn't.

From the moment she had met him, her emotions towards him were a jumbled and confusing mess. Then when they first saw each other through their Bond, on Ahch-To, her feelings had only intensified. And it terrified her. Not because she didn't know what she was feeling. It was because confronting her feelings and being honest with herself would reveal something that she didn't want to admit. That she _couldn't _afford to admit it. She cared about him. Much more than she wanted to admit. But ever since she had learned the truth about her bloodline and the word "dyad" things seemed to click into place. Her emotions were so overwhelming that her resolve crumbled and she could no longer ignore them. Rey could no longer deny the intense pull she felt towards him, this strange attraction, and the intense longing. Rey couldn't keep lying to herself when she said she didn't feel anything for him. She felt _too _much for him.

He did such strange things to her that she couldn't explain. Whenever his deep and expressive brown eyes would look at her, she would feel her breath hitch. Whenever he said her name, she could feel her heart quicken. And whenever he touched her, stars, she felt as if she was on fire. Everywhere he touched her left tingles of electricity on her skin that traveled all the way down her spine. Kriffing hell, was she…?

Rey shook her head and pushed it out of her head. For now. The wayfinder_._ That's what she was here for.

Rey hauled herself over the edge and rose to her feet. The floor was tilted sideways, the water making the metal surfaces dangerously slippery. Rey could see bits of seaweed hanging from the rafters, rusted metal twisted beyond recognition. The water dripping on the floor echoed throughout the hallway. Rey began to make her way forward when she stopped short. She could see remains of armor, stormtrooper helmets, blackened and burned, cracked, and empty. People used to wear those, people like Finn. The helmets were covered in residue from the water and stained with something that looked suspiciously like blood. The wind whistled through the various holes in the wall and floor and chills ran down Rey's spine.

She forced herself not to look at the remains and turned into an open corridor which led to another gap in the wreckage. It required another climb with hardly any handholds, the walls slick with water.

Rey was breathing hard from the exertion, and she strained to grasp the top of the wall. Pulling herself up onto the floor, she stood up to find herself in a vast chamber, exactly where the dagger had pointed to. She looked around her. The air felt cold, not just from the wind. Her gaze landed on the skeletal soaked remains of a chair...no. A throne. The Emperor's throne.

She could feel the traces of his presence, along with that of Darth Vader, and Luke. A battle, feelings of desperation, pain, regret, rage, fear, and an overwhelming desire to save someone deeply loved. That last feeling felt strangely familiar to Rey, but she didn't know why.

Rey carefully stepped forward towards the throne. It was as if she felt it calling to her. Her skin crawled at that thought. Years of scavenging served her well as she carefully navigated the fragile floor. Some panels were steady, while others were not.

Rey's gaze lingered on the skeletal remains of the throne but turned when she heard a set of doors slide open on the adjacent wall. Almost as if it had recognized her. Rey's feet were automatically moving and before she knew it, she was inside a dark chamber. Before her brain could even register what was happening, the door closed shut behind her. She flinched violently at the harsh sound and then was enveloped in almost complete blackness. Rey breathed in slowly and then steeled herself as she began to walk ahead into the darkness.

* * *

The engines of Kylo's TIE fighter roared loudly as they entered Kef Bir's atmosphere. Kylo focused on Rey's Force signature as he piloted his ship low and close to the water to avoid being seen. He weaved in and out of the debris skillfully, and then honed in on where Rey was. He circled his TIE and growled in frustration when he saw there was nowhere to land except at the end of a bridge-like metal structure jutting out from the main wreckage. It was only meters wide so he had to be careful. This task would have been near impossible for a lesser pilot, but flying was in Kylo's blood. Anakin Skywalker, Luke, and Han Solo. He pushed those thoughts out of his mind. Let the past die.

As soon as he parked the TIE, he descended from the cockpit and began walking towards the main wreck. Rey's Force signature was so bright, it was nearly impossible to miss.

He found it difficult to navigate parts of the wreckage and had to call on the Force to climb several sections. He could feel traces of Rey's presence and how easily she had scaled the wreckage. His lips turned up in a slight smirk in a strange sort of admiration. Apparently being a scavenger had its perks.

He was almost there when suddenly he felt Rey's Force signature vanish. No, not vanished, but it was distinctively stifled. It was as if something was trying to cover her up, no… It was something else. Something else was so much more powerful that it completely overwhelmed Rey's presence. Without their Bond, it would have been practically impossible to feel her.

Kylo's brows furrowed in concern and he hurried forward to find her. He didn't bother trying to lie to himself that he was only concerned for her power. He was concerned about _her_. He needed her to be safe, to be ok. The way Kylo felt about the scavenger was complex but so simple at the same time. But he couldn't bring himself to admit his weakness. She was his weakness, but at the same time, she was his strength, too.

Kylo was so distracted by his whirling thoughts that his foot slipped on a loose panel and he nearly fell. He had to focus. He had to find Rey.

* * *

Rey walked through the darkness, looking for a light, anything, just something that was different from the darkness around her. It felt suffocating and she was trying her best not to panic. Her footsteps seemed incredibly loud on the metal floor, and her breath sounded heavy.

Gradually, she began to see slivers of something. Mirrors. Jagged, broken pieces reflecting her image back at her. Not all of them were of her whole body. One showed her arm, another showed her water-soaked hair and bruised temple, while others just showed her face.

She looked at herself and was stricken with how tired she looked. Her face was pale, despite having exerted a great deal of energy climbing the Death Star. Her hair was messy, small strands of hair curled around her cheeks in front of her ears. Her clothes were soaked and disheveled and it made Rey shiver. Her face was gaunt and hollow as if she hadn't eaten in days. Healing the snake must have had more of an effect than she had thought.

Or was it just the exhaustion of her constant battle against the dark side? The agonizing amount of effort it took to close herself off from the one person she really wanted? That thought made her freeze and her body went rigid. _The one person she really wanted._ Is that how she felt about him? About Kylo Ren? Or Ben Solo?

Rey knew that she cared and held hope for Ben Solo, but Kylo Ren was her sworn enemy. Were they one and the same? And it was another thing altogether to _want _him. Kriff. She couldn't lie to herself anymore. She was just too tired. Whether she wanted to join him or just be with him in general, that man was her mortal enemy but the only other person who really understood her, she _wanted _him in some sort of way, shape, or form.

An undeniable tension and attraction had always been between them, whether they were fighting, or silently staring at each other, in a way that felt more intimate than any feasible relationship in the galaxy. The sense of devotion was stronger than family, too passionate for friendship, but not hostile enough to be enemies. It was so intense, so charged, that it was even too much to be lovers. It was like their souls were bared completely open to each other. It went deeper than attraction, stronger than infatuation, more intense than lust. It was as if their very essences merged together, making it impossible to know where they differed. It made more sense since she had learned that they were a dyad in the Force. The two of them were one whole.

But even before that revelation, she knew she had felt something. Why else would she nearly stop breathing whenever she saw him? Or her heart would race every time he so much as looked at her with those damned eyes of his? The way her body flooded with heat whenever he touched her and every point of contact felt like touching a live wire.

She knew he felt the same. They couldn't hide anything from each other. Not truly. Even now, she could feel her face growing warm as she remembered the time where he had showed up shirtless while she was repairing the lightsaber. How gently he had touched her face. Or when he was half asleep and called her beautiful. The kriffing longing she felt whenever they were together, and the painful ache of loneliness when they were apart.

Kriffing hell. This place was allowing herself to indulge in ideas and thoughts that she would normally avoid. She couldn't afford to be distracted. She needed to focus.

Rey shook her head to clear her mind but was only met with the dozens of reflections staring back at her. It reminded of the cave on Ahch-To where she had seen her image reflected over and over again. Kriff, the first person she'd gone to see after that was Ben. Rey squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. She _really _needed to stop letting him dominate her every thought.

Eerie whispers drifted in and out of her ears, tempting, promising. They sparked her curiosity and she longed to follow them to find answers, but she knew that following them would only bring her more pain, and further away from what she came here for.

A faint humming to her left captured her attention, and when she turned, she could see in the distance a pillar of inky black stone with a small pyramid suspended within. As Rey got closer, the air got colder, the whispers quieter.

When she stopped before the stone, she reached forwards and gently grasped the object and pulled it out. It was the wayfinder. Rey exhaled a sigh of relief that she didn't know she'd been holding in. She'd made it. She'd done it.

But then Rey felt a prickling sensation at the back of her neck. A wave of anxiety and dread washed over her. She was being watched. Rey slowly turned around when suddenly the familiar hiss of a lightsaber igniting made her jump. She whirled around and saw...herself.

She was wearing a dark cloak with a hood that cast a shadow over her face. Her skin was pale, and her cheeks hollow. Her eyes were cold, and red light reflected off of her irises from the twin blades of her lightsaber. The red blades sparked and crackled like Kylo's and her counterpart swung the blades so that they formed a double-bladed saber, like her quarterstaff. Rey froze in horror. That exact design was the one that she had been planning to use for her own saber.

Rey inhaled sharply and stumbled backward, still clutching the wayfinder. It was as if everything that she feared and hated about herself had come to life. Her temptations to the dark side, her fits of rage, her hunger and temptation for power, and every quality she was afraid of having from her own bloodline.

But she could feel the power surrounding the dark vision. It was intoxicating, and Rey couldn't help but linger in that feeling of immense power and strength. The dark Rey looked at her and sneered.

"Don't be afraid of who you are," she said, her voice sickly sweet. It was like a slap to Rey's face hearing Leia's exact words from this creature's mouth.

The dark Rey swung her saber in a blow towards her chest, seeking to kill. Rey snapped out of her shock just in time to parry with her own blade. Sparks flew as blue and red clashed together over and over again.

It sickened Rey to recognize her counterpart's movements, to feel familiar with the way she fought. Rey refused to let go of the wayfinder which gave the dark Rey the advantage. The dark Rey held the saber-staff with both hands, strengthening her blows. Rey's strokes were desperate and wild, making her movements clumsy and erratic.

The dark Rey folded her blades suddenly, trapping Rey's blue blade in between her red ones. The dark Rey turned her head slowly and all Rey could do was stand there, motionless. Her knees were shaking and she was breathing hard. She slowly met her counterpart's gaze.

The dark Rey hissed, revealing pointed teeth as her face turned into a feral grimace. Rey stumbled backward away from herself and fell on her back into the throne room.

She didn't even notice that the dark Rey had disappeared. But as she fell, the wayfinder slipped from her grasp. Her eyes widened in horror and she desperately reached out for it as it slid across the slanted floor. No, no, no. She had come too far to lose it now.

_Slam. _

The wayfinder abruptly stopped its descent as a gloved hand reached out and grasped it before it could fall. Rey looked up only to see Kylo Ren staring down at her. Her brain raced to process what was happening and a million thoughts flew through her mind. One in particular, though. _Shit._

* * *

Kylo regarded the wayfinder with an air of nonchalance, before training his gaze back to the scavenger.

Rey bolted upright to her feet, her body rigid as she reignited her saber, staring at Kylo with a hard, cold look in her eyes. She could feel her anger boiling just beneath the surface, aching to be let out. She attempted to breathe slowly as Leia had taught her, but it was nearly impossible to do so with Kylo standing in front of her.

His hair was damp and pushed away from his maskless face. Somehow, Rey knew that he would never wear his mask for her again. His skin glistened with sweat and ocean spray, and she could see the water droplets from the ocean on his clothes. His dark eyes were steady as they stared her down without wavering in the slightest. The wind blew a few loose strands of dark hair across his forehead. But she couldn't focus on that now. She began to walk towards him, slowly, each footstep precise and determined.

Kylo looked at Rey as she began to walk towards him. He let the hand holding the wayfinder rest over his thigh. Even though this was hardly the right time, his gaze was drawn to her face. The wind blew strands of her hair across her cheeks, her skin was glistening with sweat and water, and her lips were red as she stared him down. Her eyes, though. They held something that hadn't been there before. Burning anger. Paralyzing fear. A mix of desperation and hatred. He could feel it in waves rolling off of her. The power she was emitting was exhilarating and charged with emotion.

She was ready to turn. One more push and she would go over the edge.

"Look at yourself," he said, motioning to her offensive stance, her ignited lightsaber, the anger that surrounded her. "You wanted to prove to my mother that you were a Jedi, but you've proven something else." His tone was somewhat contemptuous and condescending. He wasn't sure what made him mention his mother, but when Rey flinched he could see that it affected her.

Rey's blood boiled when he mentioned Leia. Leia _must_ have known about her bloodline. There was no way she couldn't have. But she had still chosen to train her, to care for her, to guide her. Kylo gazed at her with a sudden touch of regret in his eyes.

"You can't go back to her now," he said, somberly. "Like I can't." Despite himself, his voice shook as he spoke. It did not go unnoticed by either of them. The pain in his voice was palpable, as if he were trying to convince himself of it, not just her.

Rey was too angry to linger on it, something she normally would have clung to in order to show him the light. Her vision swam red and every muscle in her body was as tight as a coiled wire.

"Give it to me," she ordered him, a dark tone in her voice. Her words were quiet, but she was trembling with rage. Her voice was tight and strained as if it had taken a great effort for her to speak. It took every ounce of Rey's self-control for her to remain still.

Kylo was slightly taken aback. He was surprised by her outburst of this intense anger and darkness. It emanated from her body in waves so powerful it nearly pushed him back. He reveled in it though as she got closer and closer to the dark side.

"The dark side is in our nature," he said, gazing at her with an intensity that she couldn't place. "Surrender to it."

Rey ignored him, and her jaw clenched as her hand tightened her grip on her saber.

"Give it. To me." she seethed through clenched teeth. She was gripping her saber so tightly that her knuckles were turning white.

Kylo regarded the wayfinder in his hand before looking back up at her. Her beautiful features were frighteningly fierce as she glared at him. There was something off about her eyes though, they lacked their usual warmth.

Rey felt a pit of dread grow in her stomach as she watched Kylo's eyes harden. His jaw set and his expression was one of complete resolve. His voice was eerily calm when he spoke.

"The only way you're getting to Exegol," he said, "is with me." He raised the hand that held the wayfinder and crushed it with his gloved hand. The wayfinder shattered and the remains fell to the floor, some of it sticking to his glove. Rey watched in horror as the very thing that she had traveled across the kriffing galaxy to find, the thing that she and her friends had risked their lives for, be obliterated in a blink of an eye.

Suddenly, her body caught up with her brain, and she finally gave in to the burning rage inside her.

"NO!" she screamed, swinging her lightsaber furiously at Kylo. Rage and anger seemed to take over Rey's entire body, her head pounding, her vision tinting red and it was as if something exploded inside her. She let all of her anger over this mission, over the years of waiting on Jakku which had ultimately meant nothing. Rey released all of the rage and frustration she felt over the past couple of years, at Kylo, and at herself. She didn't want to think about what had just happened, what he'd done, who she was. So she swung again and again at Kylo, her blue blade cutting through the air faster than the eye could blink.

When Rey first swung, Kylo merely stepped out of the way. She swung again, and again, but all he did was dodge her blows. The fact that he wasn't even attacking made her angrier, and she picked up the speed of her attacks.

Kylo leaned backward to prevent the blue lightsaber from cutting his chest open. He ducked and sidestepped all of Rey's blows, his boots sliding across the slick floor. Eventually, he came near the back wall and could not avoid her blows any longer. He ignited his red saber and met hers in a spray of sparks.

Shoving her saber away, he stepped back and dropped down the shaft behind them. Rey did not hesitate to follow.

To hell with logic or reason. The only thing at the forefront of Rey's mind was the urge to hurt, the intensity of her rage, and the crushing weight of her despair. All she could feel was the overwhelming urge to _hurt_ Kylo. To _win. _To _kill_. As she followed him down the shaft, Rey knew that only one of them would leave this place alive.

* * *

**Author's Note: Hello, everyone! I'm so sorry for the long wait. I'm being slammed with schoolwork for the end of the year, which is mostly me trying to make up for my procrastination lol. I'm also in the process of moving so I don't have a ton of free time. So that is the reason for the long-ass break. Thank you for being patient with my craziness lmao. I hope I did this scene justice. Next is the actual saber fight, but who knows how long that's gonna take lol. I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter!**


	23. Loss Can Be Such A Painful Thing

**Loss Can Be Such A Painful Thing**

Rey didn't remember moving from the throne room to outside the wreckage. She barely registered the wind whistling around them and the ocean spray on her face. All she was focused on was her rage. Uncontrollable, unbridled fury. Darkness oozed from her very being as her anger flared out in waves. The fact that Kylo wasn't attacking her only served to infuriate her more.

She drew from the vast depths of the Force and she relished in the power it gave her. Her movements were faster, her blows heavier. Rey felt drunk on adrenaline, power, and rage. It was like she had tunnel vision and the only intention she had was to _hurt _the man in front of her.

It felt like a choreographed dance. The blows exchanged were fast and fluid in motion, with neither one of them stopping for breath. Rey drove Kylo back further and further onto the narrow strip of metal across the water.

Rey ignored the spray of cold water hitting her face as the ocean waves crashed against the wreckage. She swung, slashed, and spun her saber in a deadly arc of blue plasma as it cut through the air. She made her way towards Kylo in a furious attempt to disarm him-no. To _kill _him.

Kylo was just frustrated at this point. He didn't want to fight her, so he made no move to attack her, just parrying her blows when needed. While Rey's skills with a lightsaber had greatly improved over time, Kylo was still physically stronger and had more experience. But Rey was a little faster than him which kept him on his guard. Kylo just wanted this fighting between them to end, even though this display of rage pushed her further into the dark side, right where he wanted her. ...right?

Rey was so caught up in the moment that she didn't even see Finn running towards her with Jannah close behind.

"REYYY!" Finn screamed. Rey's head whipped around to face him and an overwhelming surge of panic rushed through her. She had to protect her friend. But as she continued to battle Kylo, anger surged up in her, too. Finn didn't know what was going on, he didn't know what she was going through and he didn't have the right to tell her what to do and what not to do. Rey was so sick and tired of Finn butting into her business and acting like she was a fragile child that needed to be protected, even if his intentions were good at heart. But her anger lessened as the urge to keep him safe overwhelmed her.

Rey struck at Kylo and then abruptly turned. She called on the Force and thrust her hand out.

"NO!" she screamed, and she sent Finn flying backward through the air back towards Jannah, away from her. Finn couldn't be around her, not anymore, not now that she knew who she really was. It wasn't safe for him, Finn didn't deserve to be around a _disease _of darkness that tainted her blood forever. But she couldn't dwell on her friend any longer as she turned back around to face her opponent.

Kylo was surprised at Rey's outburst. She didn't even seem to care if she had hurt her friend by pushing him away. Kylo had seen him hit the ground hard. But before he could think too much of it, he was forced to turn his attention back to Rey.

Rey's blade locked with Kylo's, blue and red clashing against each other in a spray of sparks. Rey glared at him but then her gaze was suddenly directed behind him as her eyes widened. Kylo turned to look over his shoulder to see a massive wall of water descending down upon them. Rey thrust Kylo's blade away and called on the Force to leap over the massive gap between two sections of the wreckage. Kylo quickly followed, just before the wave crashed down on where they had stood only seconds before.

Rey landed with a loud _thud _on the metal and Kylo landed a few feet in front of her. He turned, brandishing his saber. Rey attacked again, shouting with effort as their blades continued to clash.

* * *

Finn had landed hard on his back with a groan of pain as he slid across the metal. But now, Finn watched in horror as Rey and Kylo Ren's figures disappeared behind the wave of water. Jannah had come to help him up but when Finn tried to get to his feet she grabbed his arm, sensing his intent. Finn tried to go after them but Jannah pulled on his arm tightly.

"No! We can't follow them!" she said, yelling to be heard over the ocean.

Finn turned to face her, his eyes wide with panic.

"I can't leave her!" he shouted. Jannah tugged on his arm more forcefully.

"We can't!" she said. Didn't he realize that? They literally couldn't. The gap was far too wide and there was no use to go after them anyway. This fight was beyond them. They would be killed by Ren, and honestly, with the state that Rey seemed to be in, Jannah was worried about what would happen to them if they followed.

"Rey!" Finn screamed one last time, staring helplessly at their fading figures. Finn felt hopeless. Rey was his best friend. He thought about their exchange on the _Falcon_, how she'd responded when he told her that he knew her.

"_Rey, I know you-" Finn said. Rey slammed the panel shut and cut him off._

"_People keep telling me they know me. I'm afraid no one does."_

Maybe she was right. Maybe he didn't know her. The Rey he knew wouldn't have pushed him away. But Finn was beginning to realize that he had to let her go. Rey had been on her own agenda even when they had first taken off from Ajan Kloss. Despite Finn's fierce instinct to protect her, he realized that Jannah was right. He couldn't protect her, even if Rey had wanted him to. He had to stop clinging to her. Rey was on her own path, and Finn had to accept that. He had to trust Rey to take care of herself. He had his own issues to worry about. He turned to Jannah and nodded grimly and the pair began to make their way back to their skimmer.

* * *

Rey continued to exchange blows with Kylo. She could tell that he was becoming frustrated with her and he started to increase the strengths of his blows, doing more than just parrying her blade away. Good. Rey wanted him to feel what she was feeling. That anger inside both of them that was causing her so much pain. She wanted him to _hurt_.

Rey brought her blade down on his, hard and he was forced to grasp the hilt with both hands to block her. She bared her teeth and glared at him before striking again. Kylo thrust his saber forward in a stab that would have run her through, but she forced her blade on top of his and thrust it down into the metal. The metal shrieked as the saber cut into it, sparks flying and the blades hissing. Rey met Kylo's gaze fiercely with her teeth gritted. He met hers back with the same intensity, but his face was a mask of infuriating calm and control.

Kylo's dark hair hung across his forehead as he stared at Rey. Steam and vapor rose from their sabers and the metal and as he met her gaze, bared teeth, blazing eyes, and all, he sent a message into her mind.

_This is who you are, Rey. Surrender to it._

_You don't know me! No one does! _She shouted back at him mentally as she glared at him. They both knew better.

_But I do,_ he pressed into her mind. They both knew it was true. They were perhaps the only people who truly understood each other, who knew each other sometimes better than they knew themselves. Rey only grew angrier and she wrenched her blade away from his and without any warning, called on the Force and flipped backward in a high arc over a massive wave of water. She landed in a crouch in front of another gun turret and looked up.

The wave had crashed over where she and Kylo had stood, but she couldn't see him. Had the wave washed him away? But as the water settled, she saw a red light emerge. Kylo strode towards her, his clothes soaked with ocean water, his dark hair plastered to his face. He turned his saber so he held it in reverse. He had withstood the wave. From the way he was looking at her, it looked like he could withstand anything.

Rey readied herself and steeled her gaze as he came towards her. He swung at her, this time with the full force of his power. Rey dodged but wasn't able to bring her blade up in time to block his next blow. So she thrust out her hand and used the force to freeze Kylo's blade in place. She was straining from the effort as the blade shook and vibrated trying to maintain its path.

Kylo swung his saber underneath and their sabers collided again and again. Rey swung again, so sure that she had caught him off guard. But her blade was stopped midway as he used the Force to freeze her blade just as she had done with his, moments before. The blue blade of the saber hummed violently as Rey struggled to move it. Streaks of blue came from the saber as it strained against Kylo's will. Rey glared at Kylo who met her gaze just as fiercely. She struck again and again.

Their sabers collided and forced them backward putting a little bit of distance between them. Both of them tried to catch their breath in this brief moment of reprieve. Rey only now began to realize how cold it was, with the harsh wind whipping around her combined with the fact that she was soaked with water. She shivered as a spray of water hit her back, but continued to press on.

Rey turned her saber so that now her grip was in reverse. She slashed quickly and forcefully, but she could feel herself tiring. She was beginning to suspect that while they were evenly matched, for the most part, Kylo was stronger and more skilled than she was. But she locked her blade with his once more and pushed it towards his crossguard. He flung their sabers up and Rey cried out as one of the vents burnt her hand.

She stumbled back and shook out her hand in pain and a bit of shock. Rey tried to draw power from her pain as she attacked again. But Kylo brought his saber down so forcefully that Rey stumbled and fell to her knees. He lowered his saber and stared down at her.

Rey was breathing heavily, her muscles were aching and her limbs were beginning to feel heavy. She looked up at him. She was exhausted. Rey didn't remember the last time she had slept, really slept. And she still hadn't recovered from healing the snake in Pasaana. But Rey refused to admit defeat.

She swung upwards but he blocked it with ease. She wasn't able to get to her feet as his blows forced her down. His last blow made her fall on her back. Rey realized that she might not be able to dodge his blows anymore.

Kylo began to bring his saber down and Rey flinched violently as if preparing herself for the worst. He froze, looking at her small form below him. Kylo realized what he had been about to do. His anger had almost gotten the best of him again. He had never wanted to kill her, and he wouldn't do it now. He stepped back slightly and lowered his saber but then his body went rigid as if he had been struck. He slowly turned behind him as if he heard the slightest whisper, calling his name…

* * *

Leia sat on her bed, holding Han's medal in her hands. She remembered placing it over his head and how she had smiled when he winked at her in a way only Han Solo could and how she had blushed. Leia remembered how hopeful she'd been after their first victory. How she had first met her brother, Chewie, and the love of her life. Her heart ached for all the ones that she had lost. Especially for Ben. Her son. Her beautiful son.

She remembered Ben being a tiny baby, crying so often but relaxing whenever he had sensed Han, Leia, or Chewie nearby. She remembered Han holding him for the first time, teaching him to fly the Falcon. His first word, the first time he used the Force. He had sent a toy flying across the room and it had hit Han's leg and she remembered how Han had yelped in surprise in a way that was so unlike Han that she had burst into laughter. Ben had giggled gleefully, clapping his small hands with his brown eyes shining. Han had laughed too and had picked up his son and tossed him up in the air, causing Ben to shriek with laughter. Han always caught him, though, being careful so he wouldn't fall.

Leia smiled as she remembered Chewie teaching Ben Dejarik, but mostly how to cheat so he'd win against his father. Chewie had helped take care of him so much, and it was only now when she looked back on it that Leia realized how little she and Han had actually been there for her son.

While she loved Han dearly, they were both stubborn and often argued. Leia only now realized the effect that must have had on Ben. Han was too restless to stay in one place for long, often out smuggling and being away from home for weeks sometimes. She had been so busy with her political career that she was often away, too. Her biggest regret was sending him off to Luke. Han was, well, _Han _about it, but she thought it would be good for Ben. She should never have pushed him away. Him or Han.

Leia looked at R2-D2 who beeped curiously at her. She gave him a small smile.

"I have to try, R2," she said, softly. "At least one more time." She had resented her birth father for so long for being Darth Vader, that she had forgotten that her actual father was Anakin Skywalker. He had turned back to the light. She knew Ben could, too. She had felt his conflict, and from her conversations with Rey, he was still conflicted with his feelings.

Her heart warmed as she thought of Rey. The girl was headstrong but kind and bright. She was so much like Ben in some ways and in other ways the complete opposite. Leia wasn't a fool, she saw how much Rey cared for her son, even if Rey didn't know it herself. And from what Rey had told her, her son cared about Rey, too. She smirked slightly. Solo men were practically putty in a woman's hand. Especially a woman that they loved. She just hoped that those two young idiots would realize that in time.

Leia closed her eyes and reached out to the Force. She let it surround her, fill her, give her the strength she needed. As she connected with every living thing, she reached out for her son. And then, with every ounce of forgiveness, hope, life, but most of all, every bit of love that Leia possessed, she sent out one last word across the galaxy.

"Ben!"

Leia lay down on her bed and she sent her son every part of her love, to let him know that he _was _loved. That he could come home. Her head touched the pillow, and she closed her eyes. The last thing she knew was her hand releasing Han's medal, R2-D2's whir of sadness, and the warm surge of welcome from Luke as he extended his hand to her. Leia grasped her brother's hand. And with that, Leia Skywalker Organa Solo breathed her last breath.

* * *

Kylo's gaze became lost and distant, as he felt his mother's presence wash over him. He didn't even notice his saber falling from his hands.

Rey caught it as a sense of triumph filled her. She ignited the blade and with a shout, she stabbed Kylo through the gut.

At that same moment, the Force trembled as Leia sent her last thought across the galaxy as she died. The moment she was gone, both Kylo and Rey felt it.

Kylo became aware of the throbbing pain in his gut and looked down to see that Rey had stabbed him with his own lightsaber. But he was nearly numb to that. Because that pain was nothing compared to the pain in his heart right now.

Rey gasped and froze as she realized what had happened. Her eyes widened and she cried out, "Leia!" She turned off the lightsaber and Kylo collapsed to the floor. He could only stare off into the distance as the pain threatened to take him.

Rey's arm lowered slowly in shock and her chest was heaving as her eyes filled with tears. It felt as if she had taken a lightsaber wound, too. Her chest ached with pain as she tried to comprehend _another _tragedy, _another _death. An overwhelming sense of loss filled her and she stumbled.

Her gaze fell to the man in front of her. Her stomach dropped when she realized what she'd done. Her anger was gone now, replaced with aching loss and sorrow. She fell to her knees next to him and stared at him. The pain she was feeling must only be a fraction of what Kylo was feeling.

Leia's last thought had been for Ben. She'd called him back to the light, back to _home._ She'd forgiven him for everything and had apologized for everything. The fact that Leia still loved him had broken Kylo on the inside. The mask over his heart had been shattered again, and this time, Kylo couldn't make himself pick up the pieces. The aching loss he felt threatened to consume him in his grief.

Kylo felt Rey kneel beside him, but he didn't look at her. He _couldn't _look at her. He felt water run down his cheeks but he wasn't sure if it was ocean spray or tears, or both.

Rey looked at the wound that she'd inflicted. It was mortal and he was already slipping away. She looked at him tearfully, tears running down her cheeks as shame filled her. Rey didn't know what to do, but then she remembered Pasaana.

Rey closed her eyes, and put her hand on Kylo's chest, near his wound, over his heart. She reached for the Force and she _gave._ She would not let him die. She drew from her life force and gave it to the broken man in front of her.

His wound slowly closed, muscle and sinew stitching back together, and the skin closed over where the wound had been, new and perfect without leaving a hint of a scar. Even the scar on his cheek, the one that she'd given him so long ago, had healed. The scar knitted closed, leaving his face unmarked, smooth, and perfect.

Kylo took a deep breath, free of pain and his chest rose and fell under Rey's hand. He looked down at her hand, astonished, and then turned to look at her face. She tearfully opened her eyes, her face a mix of pain, shame, exhaustion, and yearning. He was sure that his face mirrored a similar expression.

Why had she healed him? Why not just let him die? It's what she should have done.

Rey slumped over beside him, exhausted and drained. She looked at him as she cried, trying to convey how sorry she was. Their faces were so close that the vapor from their breath was mixing. Rey wanted nothing more than to fall into his arms at the moment, but she knew that she didn't deserve that. She reluctantly drew her hand away from him.

Kylo could feel warmth spreading throughout his body from where her hand had been. His eyes were questioning, confused, shocked.

Rey stared into his deep, expressive eyes and a fresh wave of pain washed over her when she realized how much his eyes looked like Leia's. But what struck her the most of all was the obvious longing she saw there. She could feel it across their Bond. That same longing was flowing through her.

Their shared grief for Leia only strengthened their feelings for each other, as they tried to comprehend what they had lost, and what they had just almost lost.

Rey wanted to reach out and touch his face, to just _feel_ him, to make sure he really was there, that she hadn't killed him, but she was so exhausted that she could barely move.

Kylo hated seeing her cry, but he was too dumbfounded and shocked to do or say anything. His eyes roamed over her face in confusion, trying to understand.

Rey's lower lip was trembling and the way she was shivering had nothing to do with the cold water. She was barely holding her composure together as her body racked with quiet sobs. Rey felt like her heart was breaking, disintegrating into nothingness. The weight of her grief for Leia was only worsened by the immense shame and guilt for who she was, what she had almost done. She was panting heavily, trying to catch her breath. She dropped her gaze unable to hold Kylo's eyes as he stared at her with a thousand unspoken questions racing through his mind and into their Bond. She pretended not to notice the way his eyes swept over her face and her body as his own face showed confusion and that damned longing and desire that they both had tried to deny for so long. Rey was tired of denying the way she felt. Her voice shook when she finally spoke.

"I _did _want to take your hand," she said, softly. Rey looked up at him with sorrow, pain, regret, and she finally let him see the aching _longing _she felt. Her next words were barely audible. "_Ben's _hand."

It was her way of admitting her feelings for him, sending that compassion she had for him, her anger at his stubbornness, her fear of losing him, her empathy for his loneliness, but especially the tormenting longing and the agonizing _need _she felt for him. She cared about him so much it hurt. She _needed_ him to see that.

Kylo's breath had hitched when Rey's words fell from her lips. His eyes widened as he stared at her in wonder. She was sending him image after image, unspoken words that she had longed to say, actions she wished she had done, and her most precious memories with him. She _cared _for him, as he did her. He looked into her tear-filled hazel eyes and he saw how much Rey was truly hurting and his heart broke a little more for her. His heart was racing and he felt overwhelmed from the mix of emotions that swam between them.

Rey was shaking so hard that she could barely grasp her lightsaber when she went to pick it up. She stood on wobbly legs and forced herself to run towards Kylo's parked TIE, leaving him sitting on the wreckage, dumbfounded. Rey could feel his pain, his confusion, his conflict as they mixed in with her own emotions. She couldn't look back, otherwise, she didn't think that she'd be able to leave. She had to get away from him, from everyone.

Rey sat down in the cockpit but froze for a moment. Her breaths were uneven, her heart was racing, her body was shaking and she felt the soreness in her muscles and the exhaustion that threatened to claim her. Her mind was racing and her heart was breaking. Rey forced her trembling hands to grasp the controls and pilot the ship away from Kef Bir. She didn't know exactly what she was doing as she punched in the coordinates, she was too numb to feel it.

Once the ship went into hyperspace, Rey slumped down in her seat and cried. She cried for Leia, for her friends, for who she was, for what she'd done, for what could have been, and especially for Ben. Rey trembled in the cockpit as sobs racked her body, as she left everything and everyone she loved. Especially for her other half, the one person who truly understood her, and the one person that she cared for more than anyone. The man that she lo- She couldn't bring herself to finish that sentence. She didn't deserve to.

As she cried, one thought, in particular, kept surfacing in the tumult of her thoughts: _I'm sorry, Ben. I'm so sorry..._

* * *

**Author's Note: Holy crap, this chapter was hard to write. Writing Leia's death made me want to start crying in a corner. *sobs* Aghh these emotions are so difficult to capture because I feel like there were so many things that happened between them that was unspoken. So, I hoped I captured all of the feels and angst between them. Also, I wrote a bit of Finn's POV because I was so annoyed with his character in TROS with him constantly following Rey around. So that bit I wrote in is what I wished would have happened to his character arc. Ahh, anyway, I hope I did this scene justice. Where there enough feels lmao? Ah, I hope you guys enjoyed it! Fuck, this next chapter is gonna have me crying for sure.**


	24. Forgiveness

**Forgiveness**

Kylo stood on the edge of the wreckage, staring into the crashing waves of the sea. Physically, he felt like the best he'd ever been in his life. His body was full of energy and any traces of fatigue had been expelled. Even his scars had vanished. Where there were once dozens of scars all over his body was now smooth and perfect skin. Even the scar that Rey had given him so long ago on Starkiller Base was gone.

Rey…

He was stricken dumb with her confession. With her act of mercy. With her compassion, and possibly something more...

And not to mention his mother… dammit. Her death had carved another hole in his already empty heart, bringing the unbearable feelings of emptiness, loneliness, and abandonment to surface. All the pain from his childhood dredged up from where he had tried to lock it away. It hurt so much more than his lightsaber had.

His hand went to his stomach instinctively. The wound was completely gone. He wasn't even sore. Where a gaping, ugly hole of cauterized flesh should have been, he was only met with smooth, unmarked skin.

If Rey hadn't healed him, he would be dead. It was an extraordinary display of power, something that was supposedly a powerful ability from the dark side of the Force. His grandfather had been seduced trying to seek it. But Rey had healed him from a place of light, a place of warmth. She never ceased to amaze him.

When Rey had stabbed him, he wasn't exactly surprised. Everyone expected them to fight to the death because their goal was _supposed_ to be to kill each other. But Kylo had put that thought so far away as he was trying to turn her, as he grew to care for her, that it became a half-forgotten memory.

Suddenly, Kylo was very glad that he hadn't been able to turn her. She would have lost herself as he had, and he would have lost the Rey he cared about. The dark side version of Rey wasn't the one he cared about. She likely would have gone down a similar path as he had, and he didn't want to wish his pain on her.

Over the course of their connection, they had come to care for each other in a way so deep and so complex that no one else could understand what they had. A dyad in the Force, two that were one, extremely rare and precious. It bound their souls in a way that connected them both physically and mentally across the stars. They could sense each other's feelings, their intent. So he knew that neither of them had really wanted to kill each other.

So while he knew Rey hadn't really meant to kill him, it still hurt, not just physically. Although, dying by Rey's hand seemed better than any alternative. It made sense at least. It's what she _should _do. But she saved him, instead. Why? He knew he deserved to die for all of the horrible things he had done. He was a monster, hadn't she said so herself? And he had wholeheartedly agreed with her. But Rey had decided to save him, to heal him.

Her confession that she _did_ want to take his hand had rocked him. Even though they both suspected this to be true, hearing her say it out loud was completely different. It made it real, not just a fantasy. But she had made it clear that it was Ben Solo that she wanted.

Kylo no longer tried to deny the fact that Ben Solo still existed, Rey brought it out of him every single time, but it wasn't exactly simple. His identity was so convoluted and confused that it was hard to distinguish between the person he used to be, and the person he was trying to be. He _could _at least try to let go of his resentment, his anger, his hate. But would that be enough? He wasn't even sure that he had the right to become Ben Solo again. He didn't deserve that. Besides, everyone he loved was gone.

First, his father, who had been stabbed and murdered by his own son. Fucking hell, he knew he would have nightmares of that moment until he died, and even then they might still haunt him.

Then his uncle. Kylo still carried a burning resentment towards Luke Skywalker, but he _was _still family. For a moment, Kylo allowed himself to think back to a time where Luke was his hero, his mentor, someone to look up to. He had sensed the moment Luke had died, and he fully registered that it was the effort and self-sacrifice his uncle had made to stop him that had cost Luke his life. Which made Kylo responsible, even if he hadn't struck the killing blow himself.

And his mother...damn the stars, his mother. He had chosen not to kill her when he had sensed her on the bridge of the _Raddus. _He couldn't do it. Snoke had called him weak. And now, his mother had died reaching out _for_ him_._ Knowing full well that it would cost her her life, and despite all of the horrific things he had done, she called to him with love and forgiveness that he didn't deserve. She had called him back to the light, back home. But she was gone now. All of his family. Gone. Because of him.

And then his thoughts drifted back to Rey. His head swam and his heart raced at the mere thought of her. Fuck, what was wrong with him? He wasn't a desperate, love-struck boy- His thoughts trailed off. No, that's exactly what he was, wasn't it?

_Love… _

He nearly lost his footing on the edge of the wreckage.

Her act of healing him had come from a place of compassion and _love._ Somehow, for some reason, Rey cared for him, _loved _him enough to literally give up some of her own life to save him. And at great cost to herself-he saw how exhausted she was afterward.

He could still see her anguished gaze, her cheeks dripping with ocean spray and tears, her hair plastered to her neck and forehead. He could still remember the way those water droplets clung to her eyelashes, how close she had been, the way her lips parted as she concentrated. She had looked tortured, ashamed, feelings that Kylo had come to know all too well over the course of his life. He had wanted to brush her tears away, to alleviate her pain, but he had been too shocked to move.

Her confession not only revealed that she _had _wanted to take his hand, but it was also an affirmation of her feelings for him, and his for her. The powerful connection they shared, the compassion and understanding that they held for each other. The undeniable feeling of coming home to each other, and their mutual sense of longing and desire. He could still feel the warmth of her gaze and the warmth of her hand over his chest.

Her act of mercy, of compassion, combined with her confession, had shattered the barriers over his heart. The dark restraints that had tormented him since he was a child were completely eradicated. For maybe the first time in his life, his thoughts were truly his own. Snoke wasn't there to feed into his doubt, Sidious wasn't trying to manipulate his thoughts with twisted lies. Kylo could think for himself.

So he stood there, at the edge of the wreckage, staring out into the ocean, lost in thought. The wind blew his wet hair across his forehead, his clothes still dripping with ocean water, as he gripped his lightsaber tightly.

"Hey, kid."

Kylo froze. That voice, the familiarity, the love, it was like a punch to the gut. He swallowed hard and steeled himself before he turned. Kylo turned around and met with the warm gaze of Han Solo.

His father had his worn leather jacket over a wrinkled, white shirt, with a half-cocked posture and his signature half-smile. His blaster was in its holster on his leg, and his boots were stained with oil. His gray hair was a little longer than Kylo remembered, and Han's jaw was covered in light stubble. His eyes still had that glint of mischief, but it was as if that had been subdued by sorrow and hardship.

Kylo felt like he couldn't breathe, and his heart was racing in his chest. Han Solo was dead. This wasn't real. It _couldn't _be real. Nevertheless, his hands were shaking as he stared at the familiar face of his father.

Han gave him a small smile.

"I miss you, son," he said. Kylo's breath caught in his throat. He hadn't been called that in a long time, hadn't claimed that identity for years. He hadn't been worthy of that title; he wasn't sure he had ever been. Before he could let emotion completely overwhelm him, he forced himself to speak.

"Your son is dead," he said. But even as he spoke, Kylo could hear the tremor in his voice, and he cursed himself for being weak. Han gave him a sad smile.

'No," he said, stepping towards him. "_Kylo Ren_ is dead." Han now stood face to face with him as he continued. "My son is alive."

Unable to hold his father's gaze, Kylo's eyes flitted down. He scanned Han and used this as an opportunity to regain control of himself.

"You're just a memory," he said, but the realization brought him no relief. He was shaking, and it was taking everything in him not to completely break down.

Han simply smiled at him.

"_Your _memory," he said, softly. Kylo stared at the apparition of his father, unable to say anything more. He was right. Kylo was reliving the moment on Starkiller Base. His gut twisted and he felt like the pain was going to consume him.

Han smiled again and urged gently, "Come home."

Kylo shook his head vehemently, desperately trying to cling to the darkness within him, to the belief that he simply _couldn't _anymore.

"It's too late," he said, and he tried to speak again but was stopped by the hard lump in his throat. He forced his trembling voice past and continued, "She's gone." He wasn't sure if he meant his mother or Rey. He supposed it was both. They were both gone.

Han smiled sadly and Kylo's grief renewed. "Your mother's gone," Han said. "But what she stood for, what she fought for, _that's _not gone." Han gave Kylo a meaningful look. Kylo could only stand still as his body shook and his mind raced. Han looked at his son tenderly with so much love, it was overwhelming. "_Ben_." His voice was so gentle, so _forgiving,_ that it nearly broke Kylo.

He closed his eyes for a brief moment, and he knew what he had to do. He had always known. He had just been too stubborn, too lost, and too bitter to realize it.

"I know what I have to do," he said, reprising the words he'd said on Starkiller Base. "But I don't know if I have the strength to do it."

Instead of Han taking the lightsaber like he had last time, he lifted his hand to rest on his son's cheek. Rey had been right. He hadn't been able to forget the warmth of his father's hand, the rough calluses, and the acceptance in his eyes. His father's eyes held all the love, forgiveness, and faith in the galaxy.

Han smiled gently. "You do," he said. His father believed in him. He remembered that there was a time where he had wanted to be just like his father, and all he had ever wanted was his father's approval and affection. Now, he began to understand that he had had it all along, he had always had his family's love. His father, his mother, Rey, and even Luke had forgiven him in the end.

He raised his lightsaber and looked at it for a moment. He remembered the way it had felt between him and Han, and the horrible screech of the weapon as it ignited and impaled his father's chest. This time, Han didn't take it.

He looked back up at his father, suddenly feeling very small, like he was a boy again.

"Dad…" he said, his voice trembling. He could no longer keep his tears at bay, and his breath shuddered as tears ran down his cheeks.

Han Solo looked at his son with a warm smile and said, "I know."

Filled with sudden resolve, his father's love, and forgiveness, Ben Solo turned and launched his lightsaber with all his strength. It sailed into a high arc before disappearing in the ocean waves. When he turned around, his father was gone. But it was ok, his father had forgiven him, and Ben's mind was no longer in turmoil.

Ben felt so much lighter without the weight of his lightsaber, and the darkness that had haunted him since birth. He took a long breath and thought for a moment. He had to get back to Rey. Knowing her, she was going to go to Exegol alone. Ben couldn't let her do that.

Ben made his way back down the wreckage and was suddenly annoyed when his long black cape snagged on a piece of metal. He shrugged it off, leaving it on the durasteel. His tunic was soaking, and the wind only made him that much colder. He tore that off too, leaving a light, black, sweatshirt on. He touched the hole in his shirt from his lightsaber. He didn't mind, he had more important things to worry about.

Unencumbered by his heavy clothes, Ben found it much easier to run back to the wreckage, and coax a TIE fighter into flying. It took fucking forever but when he finally got to hyperspace, he only had one goal in his mind. To just find Rey, to help her.

Ben could now finally accept how much he cared about her, how much he loved her. He didn't have any doubt that he did. If anything, his affection for Rey had been one of the few constants in his life. He had to let her know that she wasn't alone, to keep the promise he made her on Ahch-To. Ben wasn't sure what would happen after he found her, but then he decided that it didn't matter. As long as he was with her, he was on the right path.

* * *

**Author's Note: **

**I'm so sorry for the late update. Life has been crazy lately, but the move is done and summer school isn't terrible so I should be getting back into a more regular pace.**

**Originally, I was going to put this chapter with the scene where Rey talks to Luke, but since I haven't posted in so long and that this feels like a good stopping point, I decided to split the chapter up. I know some people are gonna complain that Han Solo being there was just fan service, I'm gonna respectfully disagree. I think it's great that Ben got to make peace with his father, and I'm sure that this particular scene was meant for Leia. For Leia to project herself to Ben one last time and then dying. Tragically, with Carrie Fisher's passing, they obviously didn't have the footage for that. But I thought it was a beautiful parallel from the scene in The Force Awakens. And I think it's safe to say that by now these two idiots (Ben and Rey) can finally realize and admit that what they feel in their connection is love, don't you think? It feels right to have them realize this just before Exegol and then having them be so happy seeing each other. I hope you guys enjoyed reading, but on a more serious note, I'm gonna end this super long Author's Note on a more somber message.**

**I just want to say that my heart and prayers go out to everyone in this pandemic, and especially those who have lost loved ones due to police brutality. Seeing what happened on the news made me sick, and the way that peaceful protests are being handled is disgusting. What happened to George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and so many others is horrible, and no one should EVER have to go through something like that. I pray for our Black brothers and sisters in God's name, that they would be protected, that they will get justice for the wrongs done to them, that God would help the families heal and use this time to bring people together, and help us learn to forgive the ones who have wronged others, while still getting justice for what they've done. **

**The state in which America is in breaks my heart and is sickening to see the way politicians are handling this. It's sickening to see police suffocate a man who's repeatedly said, "I can't breathe," or to see a video of a policeman brutally attacking a student at a peaceful protest, or seeing police throwing tear gas and shooting rubber bullets at people. It's so sad to see a repeat of a pattern from 50 years ago during the civil rights acts, or even 150 years ago during the civil war. You think we would have learned something by now. **

**I don't know why this is happening, I leave this in God's hands, but my deepest sympathies and prayers go to everyone who is suffering from this. I'm so sorry this is happening to you and to others, and I will pray and hope for this to end soon where there is a world where everyone is respected and loved, no matter what their skin color is. There is a lovely and inspiring video on YouTube that's called "we need more." I would highly recommend checking it out, as I can't put a link in here but if you search "we need more" I'm sure it will come up. **


	25. The Destiny of a Jedi

**The Destiny of a Jedi**

Tears stung Rey's eyes as she angrily threw pieces of driftwood at Kylo's burning TIE. Not that it did anything, but it felt good to throw something. Smoke rose into the sky as the sun began to set over Ahch-To, and a ragged porg squawked in dismay.

Rey yelled until her voice was hoarse as she threw more pieces of wood at the burning ship. The heat was stifling and the smoke made her eyes smart and lungs burn, but she didn't care. Not anymore. Her sense of despair was suffocating. She felt shame, sorrow, fear, anger, and a tremendous amount of loss. Her heart felt empty, broken, irreparable.

She wanted to scream and cry until her throat hurt and her voice gave out. Her eyes blinked furiously against the acrid fumes of the burning metal. Rey hadn't understood why Luke had gone into hiding, to abandon everything. Not until now. Now she understood.

She would never see anyone she loved again. Leia was gone. She would never see Finn again, or banter with Poe. She would never be able to laugh with Rose about how ridiculous the boys were. Rey would never see Chewie again, he'd never give her another comforting hug that nearly squeezed her in two. She'd never be able to hear BB-8's merry beeps again.

And then there was Ben… Her heart ached at the simple thought of his name. She missed him so much already. She was devastated by what she'd done to him, what she had almost done. She'd let her anger get the best of her, and it caused her to nearly kill the person closest to her. The only one who understood her. Her other half.

Rey remembered his eyes, kriff, they were so much like Leia's that it hurt, and how confused he had been, but also how clear his gaze was. It wasn't muddled, confused, or blurry anymore.

She could still feel his chest rising and falling beneath her hand, hear his sharp intake of breath, see his soul-piercing gaze in his dark eyes. She remembered his silent question. _Why? _He hadn't even said it through the Bond, but he didn't need to. His eyes had been enough.

Rey could still feel that bolt of longing that had shot through them, their mutual heartbreak over Leia, and over each other. Over their damn circumstances.

Rey knew why she had healed him. Why she would have died to save him. Why she had wanted to take his hand. She was just terrified to verbalize it.

Rey had never felt anything so intense in her life. Not even her fierce friendship with Finn, who was basically her brother in all but blood, could even come close to what she had with Ben. Every other relationship she'd ever had paled in comparison to what she felt for Ben. Rey hadn't exactly had the best examples of love growing up. Jakku was about survival and everyone for themselves. The only reason that anything resembling that would take place was just for pleasure, or abuse without any real meaning.

Rey closed her eyes and tried to remember her mother and father. She tried to hold on to the love in their eyes as they promised her that she would be ok. She could remember the barest glimpse of how her father looked at her mother. The love, devotion, the adoration in his gaze was breathtaking. And Rey had only seen that gaze in one other place. Whenever Ben Solo would look at her, she would see that same breathtaking gaze that made her forget how to think properly.

Ben Solo, not Kylo Ren. Kylo Ren's eyes had a hungry glint about it, but Ben's eyes were softer, gentler, more vulnerable. And she loved him all the more for it. Rey froze instantly when she realized what she'd thought. She _loved _him… Oh, fuck, Rey realized. She was in love with Ben Solo. Fuck. And she would never be able to tell him. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

She remembered how she had felt staring at him on the wreckage. Oh, how she had wanted to succumb to her pent up desires, and just fall into his arms. She'd been tempted to kiss him just to forget all the horribleness of that moment. But she fought that urge and shoved it away like she had so many times already. Kriff, there were so many times where she had wanted to kiss him, hug him, touch him, to just be with him that she had lost count. During their emotionally charged moments of intimacy, there were times where she had almost lost her self-control, or when he nearly gave up on his restraint. Fuck, she knew that he loved her, just as much, if not more than she loved him. And now, she was only just realizing how much she loved him. Fuck.

Just when she'd thought she had no tears left to cry, her eyes stung as tears welled up. Rey loved him. She loved him so damn much. Which was all the more reason why she couldn't be near him. She had hurt him, nearly killed him. Ben would never hurt her intentionally, Rey was sure of that. But even when he was Kylo Ren, for all that Kylo Ren had done, he had never tried to intentionally hurt her. But she had run him through with his own saber without hesitation.

During their duel, he had deflected the majority of her attacks. And now, she would never be able to see him again. Not even through the Bond. She would cut herself off from the Force if she had to. Tears fell down her face as she squeezed her eyes shut. Ben didn't deserve to be around a monster like her. Her friends didn't either.

Rey bowed her head in shame, letting her white hood hide her face. She opened her eyes and her gaze fell upon her lightsaber. Luke's lightsaber. Anakin's lightsaber. The Skywalker legacy lightsaber. By all rights, it should belong to Ben. A stab of pain went deep into her chest as she thought of him. No, Rey didn't deserve to have this. Not anymore. She never was worthy of it in the first place.

She was nothing, nobody, a mere scavenger from Jakku. Another stab of pain shot through her as she realized that she couldn't even say that anymore. She was the descendent of the most evil being in the galaxy. She was a Palpatine. Granddaughter of the Emperor. The same Emperor who had seduced Anakin Skywalker to the dark side. The same Emperor who had nearly killed Luke, who had threatened Leia, and _had _killed Anakin Skywalker and the twins' mother, Padmé. The same Emperor who had been manipulating, hurting, and tormenting Ben from before he was even born.

Rey couldn't bear the thought that she was related to the person who had hurt everyone she loved. Her friends, her mentors, and Ben. Especially Ben. She was related to the monster that hurt the person that she loved more than anything and anyone in the galaxy. Self-loathing and shame washed over her like a tidal wave.

Rey took the legacy lightsaber from her belt and looked at it. The repairs she had made to piece it back together only seemed to taunt her, reminding her of how her heart had been split in two, away from everyone she loved, away from Ben.

Anger and despair rose to the surface and pain grew in Rey's head and chest, compounding each other and tearing her apart. Her tear-filled eyes went back to the inferno in front of her and she gripped the metal casing of the saber tightly.

With an angry cry, Rey flung the saber into the fire with all of her strength. But before the fire could envelop it, a hand shot out and caught the saber with a resounding _smack_. Rey stared, dumbfounded, and then realized that the hand was oddly transparent and was tinged with blue. Her eyes widened in shock when she saw Luke Skywalker walking towards her.

Luke held himself with a more confident stance than he had in life. His hair was longer, and he was wearing his Jedi robes, his cloak dragging on the ground behind him. But his body was translucent and a blue aura surrounded him. A Force ghost.

Luke walked through the fire without difficulty and looked at Rey with a half-smile.

"A Jedi's weapon deserves more respect," he said. The irony was not lost on either of them, given that he had tossed this very saber over his shoulder last time he held it. Rey could only stare at him in shock.

"Master Skywalker?" Rey's voice shook as she spoke, and she felt more confused than ever.

Luke looked at her with an almost exasperated sigh. "What are you doing?"

Rey wasn't sure how to respond to that. Looking at Luke though, she suspected that he already knew.

Sensing her hesitation, Luke motioned her over to a ledge of stone a little aways from the fire. Rey slumped down onto the rock, exhausted. Healing the snake on Pasaana, healing Ben, and the events of her entire day had exhausted her.

Luke stood in front of her, and as soon as he let Rey catch her breath, he gave her a pointed look and waited for her to respond. Rey took a deep breath and began to recount what had happened on the Death Star.

"I did everything I was trained not to," Rey said. Her head hung low in shame. "I drew my saber first, attacked him, blind with anger." Luke looked at her with a sympathetic gaze.

"But then you healed him," he said. Rey nodded but was still unable to meet Luke's eyes.

"I gave him some of my life," she said, softly. "In that moment I would have given him all of it…" she paused, before continuing in a voice barely above a whisper. "Died, if I had to." Luke nodded kindly at her.

"Your compassion saved him," he said.

Rey didn't look at him and shook her head. She couldn't accept anything resembling a compliment, or anything positive about herself. She didn't deserve it. How could she, after everything that she had done?

"I could have _killed _him…" she whispered with her lips trembling and her voice was heavy with shame. "I almost did. How could I have done that to anyone? To him especially? I…" she trailed off and bit the inside of her cheek, hard, to keep from crying. Luke looked at her sadly.

"You care for him," he said gently, more as a statement than a question. Rey nodded and wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. Luke saw the pain on her face and his eyes softened. "Why are you here, Rey?" he asked. Rey blinked, and her head lowered in shame again.

"I don't want to hurt anyone else. I saw myself on the dark throne. Of the Sith." She shook her head vehemently. "I _won't_ let it happen." Rey looked up at the Jedi Master, her face full of pain and determination. "I'm never leaving this place. I'm doing what _you _did." Luke looked at her sadly.

"Rey, I was wrong," he said. Rey looked up at him in surprise. Luke looked around the island with regret in his eyes. "It was fear that kept me here." Luke's gaze leveled back to her. "What are you most afraid of?"

Rey's eyes lowered, and the vision she saw on the Death Star flashed through her mind. She saw herself in that horrible glow of that red, double-bladed saber. She saw the mortal wound she had inflicted upon Ben. She inhaled shakily and spoke, her voice trembling.

"Myself." It was easy to admit, but at the same time, it was so hard to say it out loud.

Luke looked her dead in the eye with a straight face and said without blinking, "Because you're a Palpatine."

Rey felt all the air leave her lungs and her eyes widened as her gaze snapped up to meet the Jedi Master. Her mouth opened and closed as she tried to speak, but no words came out. He said it so casually as if it wasn't a big deal. Rey struggled to speak but her thoughts were traveling at lightspeed, going to fast for her to process anything.

Luke looked at her and said, "Leia knew it, too." Rey's eyes widened as she took in this new piece of information. She finally forced her voice past the lump in her throat.

"She didn't tell me…" Rey said, shaking her head in bewilderment. She stared at the ground, unsure of what else to say. Luke moved to sit beside her, his ghostly, blue form radiating calm.

His sense of calm and control suddenly reminded her of Ben, and how calm he had been in the first couple of Force bonds on this very island. Kriff, she had to stop thinking about him. It hurt too much.

Rey paused when she realized something else. "She still trained me," she said, her brow furrowed in confusion. Why did Leia continue to train her? She was the descendent of the most powerful Sith lord in the galaxy, a dangerous and reckless weapon that could turn on the Resistance at any moment. Darkness and evil were literally in her blood. Luke seemed to sense her unspoken question. He looked at her kindly.

"Because she saw your spirit," Luke said. "Your heart." Rey looked at him with a pained expression as if she didn't believe him. She wasn't sure she could. The dark side was literally coursing through her veins, tainting her from the moment she was born. She was related to the most ruthless, manipulative, and evil person in the galaxy.

"Rey," Luke said, gently. Rey looked up to meet his kind gaze. "Some things are stronger than blood," he said, his voice heavy with the truth to those words.

Rey wanted to believe him, but she dropped her gaze down as she wrestled with her tumult of feelings.

Her mind wandered back to Leia's teachings, and she closed her eyes. Breathe in, and out. In, and out. She cleared her mind and calmed her racing heart. Luke was right. Some things _were _stronger than blood. Hope, loyalty, compassion, and love. Love, most of all.

Her blood did not define her. Leia hadn't let the fact that she was the daughter of Darth Vader stop her from creating her own identity as a strong, powerful, and inspirational leader. Neither had Luke. He hadn't fallen to the dark side.

Rey's love for her friends was stronger than the darkness inside her. Her love for Ben was stronger than that. Luke's eyes twinkled as he watched the young girl's emotions flicker over her face.

"Yes, Rey," he said. "_Love _most of all, is the most powerful." She looked up at him, and his gaze was shrewd and knowing as he looked at her. He knew. Rey felt her cheeks burn and she averted her gaze.

Rey closed her eyes and allowed herself to think of Ben, just for a moment. Stars, she loved him so much that she could physically feel the ache in her chest. The yearning and warmth that his brown eyes had held on Kef Bir haunted her. She remembered all the times that he had offered her his hand, and how badly she had wanted to accept every damn time. But she was still afraid, and she hated herself for being weak.

"Being afraid isn't a weakness, Rey," Luke said, sensing her thoughts. "It proves you care, and accepting that you're afraid is much braver than pretending not to be." Rey drew her gaze away from her hands and back to Luke's face. He turned towards her and smiled grimly. "Confronting fear is the destiny of a Jedi," he said. "_Your _destiny."

Rey looked down, feeling overwhelmed. Suddenly, she understood why Ben had hated his family name and the legacy that everyone expected from him. Luke looked at her sympathetically.

"Rey, if you don't face Palpatine, it will mean the end of the Jedi," Luke said grimly. "And the war will be lost." Rey flinched slightly upon hearing her surname and she swallowed hard to push down her rising sense of panic.

She looked up to meet Luke's gaze, who was sympathetic and sad as if wishing that she didn't have to deal with this. Rey frowned suddenly as she recalled Luke's words.

"But didn't you say that it _was _time for the Jedi to end?" she asked. Luke nodded solemnly.

"I did," he said. "And I still stand by that. But I had a talk with an old friend, and it made me think." Luke smiled as he stared out into the sea. "Perhaps it was time for the meaning of the Jedi to end, to grow beyond the restraints and rigidity that made it fail." Luke shook his head sheepishly. "All my talk of balance, and I was still too blind to see it." He looked at Rey, growing serious. "You were right, Rey. Everyone has conflict in them, a mixture of light and dark. The Force doesn't deal in absolutes. It's just the way of the Force. _Balance_."

Rey looked at him, startled, not expecting his confession. Luke looked at her with a regretful gaze.

"You were right about Ben, too," he said softly. Rey looked up at him sharply, surprise on her face. "I failed him, my own nephew. You were right, I should have done more." Luke's eyes were sad, melancholy, and full of regret as he thought of his sister's son. "You were right not to give up on him, that's where I failed. I should have been stronger."

Rey's heart was heavy as she thought of Ben, and as she thought about the weight of her failures.

"I wanted to seem strong for Leia," she said, softly. Luke smiled ruefully.

"Leia was the strongest of us all," he said with a light chuckle as he went to stand up. "There's something my sister would want you to have."

Rey looked at him in confusion, and he raised his eyebrow shrewdly at her.

"What, you think it was an accident that we found each other? Two orphans from the desert? The Force brought you to me and Leia for a reason." He motioned for Rey to follow him as he began walking towards the stone huts.

It took Rey a moment to get her bearings before she stood up. She winced as her sore muscles protested and she was shocked at how wobbly her knees were, and how weak she felt. She really was exhausted. Her vision swam for a moment as her head spun from the sudden movement. She waited a moment for it to clear, before quickly following Luke.

* * *

Rey was inside Luke's old hut as she knelt down on the ground. Her hands grasped a stone in the wall and with a grunt of effort, she pulled it out and put it to the side. Inside lay a leather-bound pouch tied neatly with a string. It hummed with a familiar energy that she couldn't quite place...and then she unwrapped it. Inside lay a cool, metal cylinder of a lightsaber. The silver-plated metal was mixed with lines of copper running down the handle and around the edges.

Rey hesitated before gently picking it up, holding it gingerly. As soon as she touched the saber, a rush of familiar, comforting energy washed over her. She smiled, suddenly realizing where she recognized it from.

"Leia's saber," she whispered reverently. It was beautiful, a little slimmer and more elegant than her brother's lightsaber. It thrummed with power, but it was gentler in a way, it had a soothing effect and an air of control, all things Leia had possessed. Luke stood behind her and smiled sadly.

"It was the last day of her training," he said, and a vision filled her mind.

It was dark and cloudy. Mist swirled everywhere making it difficult to see, the wind whipping the greenery every which way.

Leia's saber shook on a soft patch of grass before it went flying into her hand. She saw a figure with a green lightsaber step into her view, he wore a helmet with a visor covering his face. It was Luke, Rey realized and found it strange to see him this way, so young and full of life.

He swung his saber in a challenge, and Leia ignited hers, a blue glow casting along the ground. She charged after her brother, swinging her saber ferociously.

The twins exchanged blows, sparks from the clashes of their lightsabers illuminating the air around them.

Rey could feel the absolute joy Luke had felt. He had _loved _training his sister.

Leia suddenly grabbed her brother's wrist, the one that was holding his lightsaber. She delivered a swift kick to his torso, making him double over before throwing him onto the ground. Despite lying on his back with the breath knocked out of him, Rey could feel the immense pride that Luke had for his sister's abilities.

The man on the ground lifted his visor to reveal a much younger version of Luke. It was startling to see her mentor just a few years older than her. He was clean-shaven, a youthful charm in his eyes, and his face lacked the jaded defeat and fatigue that Rey had seen when she had known him.

Then the other flipped their visor up and Rey inhaled sharply. Leia. She looked so young, but regal and beautiful as always, with the blue glow of her lightsaber reflecting off of her face, with little tendrils of brown hair falling out of her helmet. But her brown eyes were sad, full of longing.

Rey felt as if she'd been punched in the gut. Those were Ben's eyes. How many times had he looked at her like that? How many times had she looked at _him _like that?

Her heart wrenched inside her chest as she looked at Leia. It startled her to see her mentor, the closest thing she had to a mother, so young and so sad.

"Leia had told me that she had sensed the death of her son at the end of her Jedi path," Luke said, sorrow and regret tinged in his voice. Rey's eyes widened and her heart seemed to freeze in her chest. That meant…

Rey could only stare at the saber in her hands, suddenly aware of what this meant.

"She surrendered her saber to me and said that it would be picked up again, by someone who would finish her journey," Luke said.

Rey was trying to process all this new information at once, but her head ached as she tried to make sense of it all. Her lineage, the Death Star, Leia's saber, Ben...it was too much.

"A thousand generations live in you now," Luke said. "But this is your fight." Rey looked at him in confusion. What did he mean by that?

Luke motioned to the lightsaber in her hand. "You'll take both sabers to Exegol."

Rey had clipped both sabers to her belt but now she stood up and looked at the Jedi Master in confusion.

"I can't get there," she said. "I don't have the wayfinder, I destroyed Ren's ship." Luke looked at her fondly with a kind smile on his face.

"You have everything you need," he said. Rey paused and then she suddenly exited the hut and made her way back down to the burning TIE fighter.

Most of the fire was gone and the ship just a smoldering wreck. A few porgs were huddled nearby in an attempt to soak up the fire's residual warmth. Rey crouched down in front of the cockpit and strained to reach a compartment inside the ship. She winced when her arm brushed against a piece of metal that was still hot from the fire.

She finally opened the compartment, and smoke and steam rose from the panel, clouding her vision. When the smoke cleared, she saw _Vader's_ wayfinder sitting inside, untouched and unharmed.

Rey carefully pried the wayfinder from the wires and pulled it out of the cockpit. She stood and looked at the wayfinder in her hand, holding it gently as if she were afraid it would shatter if she gripped too hard.

"Two were made," she whispered, almost reverently. A large crash of ocean waves caught her attention and she turned from the TIE and hurried towards the rocks.

The constant sound of the sea was always present on Ahch-To, but the sea was usually calm and gentle, especially compared to what she had just been through on Kef Bir. So when she heard the churning of the roiling water, she hurried over and was met with the sight of...a ship?

Rey stared in awe as she watched an old X-wing rising from the sea. Blue, shimmering, waves of water rolled off the wings in mini waterfalls. Seaweed clung to the landing gear and the cockpit was waterlogged and there were smudges all over the ship, but at that moment, it looked like the most beautiful ship Rey had ever seen.

She suddenly remembered seeing this same ship over a year ago submerged and sunken in the sea when she had first come to Ahch-To to find Luke.

She turned around to see a figure a little ways behind her. A blue figure against the cliffside, Luke had his eyes closed in concentration as he carefully lifted his ship from the depths of the ocean and landed it on a plane of flat land with the smallest _thump_.

Luke opened his eyes and smiled shrewdly. Rey felt her lips lift up in a small smile in return. She turned back to the X-wing and took a deep breath.

She was so lost in thought that she didn't even realize that Luke had come to stand next to her.

"I know what you're thinking," luke said suddenly, causing Rey to jump in surprise. Luke chuckled. "You want to jump in that cockpit and go right now, don't you?" Rey opened her mouth to protest but Luke put a hand out in front of her face, effectively stopping her. "Rey, you're not going to do the galaxy any good if you face Palpatine half-dead," he said gently.

He motioned to the Lanai caretakers that were beginning to make their way towards them.

"Let the caretakers clean up the ship, while you rest and get your strength back. You're going to need all of it." Luke looked at her with a fondness in his eyes, and she could suddenly see the resemblance to Leia.

Rey nodded with a small smile. "Yes, Master," she said softly. She _was _exhausted.

Rey stumbled into one of the stone huts and sank down on the stone bench. She put the lightsabers and the wayfinder next to her before she laid down on her back. She could already feel her eyelids growing heavy.

But before she could close her eyes, Rey thought for a few moments. She had to use the wayfinder to get to Exegol. Then she had to get past an army of Star Destroyers without being seen, and go up against the most powerful Sith in the galaxy with nothing but two lightsabers? The ridiculousness of it almost made it sound funny in her head. But no, she was going to have to do this, for real.

This was a suicide mission. Rey knew that if she did this, there was a high chance she would not make it out alive. She could hope, but realistically, she knew how low the odds were, even without C-3PO to tell her.

But if it meant saving the galaxy, and saving her friends, she would gladly give up her life for them. She just knew that she could not, _would _not let Palpatine win. But at the same time, taking on the most powerful Sith lord in the galaxy by herself was laughable. Alone…

Suddenly, Rey's thoughts turned to Ben. She remembered when she had gone to him after being in the cave about her parents just about a year ago. How she had immediately reached for him, and he comforted her with no hesitation. She remembered not feeling alone at that moment, feeling cared for, unlike now where she felt a sense of hollowness eating her heart from the inside.

She felt a sudden wave of guilt as she realized that she had stranded him on the Death Star with no means of escape. She had abandoned him, again. Even though she knew that he would most likely be able to get out, her guilt still threatened to consume her. And she missed him. And stars, did she miss him.

She was tempted to reach out for him using their Bond, but she quickly dismissed that idea. He wouldn't want to see her. And she knew that she could never see him again. She'd caused him too much pain in his already painful life.

Even if he tried to chase after her, he didn't have a wayfinder, or a ship, anymore. And why would he anyway? He should hate her by now. She had rejected him time after time again and then she had basically killed him.

Her breath froze when she suddenly remembered what Luke had said. Leia had sensed the death of her son at the end of her Jedi path. And if she was supposed to complete Leia's journey, then that meant… No, no, no, no, no…

Suddenly, Rey was very glad that she had stranded him on the Death Star. She would _not _allow another death on her hands, much less Ben's. She had nearly killed him once, that was more than enough. She couldn't handle it if she caused Ben's death.

Rey could feel her eyes closing against her will, but before she succumbed to sleep, she knew one thing was for certain. She was sure of one thing about her and Ben. Rey wouldn't be able to live with herself if she caused the person she loved most to die.

* * *

**Author's Note: Ahh! I'm SO sorry for how long this took to update! I really didn't plan on being MIA for a month, and I'm so sorry about that. I'm finished with summer school, so hopefully, that actually leaves me with more time to write. This took a long time to write omg, and since Ben got a turn to do some self-reflecting about his feelings for Rey, I figured Rey should get the same chance. I expanded a little more on this scene because I don't know. Something about it seemed off, or just unnatural. My guess is that this was a heavily edited scene because the dialogue doesn't really flow as well. I also tried to fix some character inconsistencies, especially for Luke because-intentionally or unintentionally-TROS seems to contradict a lot of stuff in TLJ. Thank you for being patient with me, and while I hope I won't take as long with this next chapter as I did this one, I can't make any promises on that since the next chapter, or the next couple of chapters, is Exegol, and there's a LOT happening there lol. I don't think I'll wait another month though, haha. I hope you guys enjoyed this!**


	26. Welcome to Exegol

**Welcome to Exegol**

When Rey emerged out of hyperspace, she immediately put the X-wing into attack-mode at the sight of the massive armada of Star Destroyers that surrounded her. She flew past the fleet cautiously, but could somehow sense that they weren't going to fire on her. The Emperor wanted her here alive for some twisted reason.

Rey tried to calm her breathing as she weaved through Star Destroyers and evaded the deadly and erratic bolts of lightning. It reminded her of the Force lightning she had unleashed on Pasaana, and she shuddered at the memory.

She saw a hulking, black, and foreboding silhouette in front of her and steered the X-wing towards the base of it. The ship landed with a soft _thump_ on the ground.

Rey sank into her seat for a moment, allowing herself a moment to breathe. Her hands were shaking so she forced them to be still into her lap. Closing her eyes for a moment, she reached out to the Force to calm herself. She took a few deep breaths as she steeled herself for what was to come.

Her hands, which were now steady, came up to undo the chinstrap of her helmet. She made sure that both of the Skywalker lightsabers were clipped to her belt before she exited the X-wing.

The air was dry and felt hot and cold at the same time. Lightning flashed overhead sporadically with horrible, grating screeches. The smell of ozone was heavy in the air. The ground was dry and dusty. Her boots kicked up a faint cloud of dust with each step. Everything was bathed in an ethereal blue glow and the cold darkness pouring from this planet seemed infinite.

Rey walked forwards steadily, willing herself not to shake. She knew that confronting the Emperor, her grandfather, Darth Sidious, was insane. If he had cheated death before, who's to say he won't do it again? But she had to try. She owed that to the Resistance. To Leia, and Luke. And for Ben…

Her throat tightened when she thought of him. His dark eyes still haunted her, as they pierced through her soul. She tried not to focus on how much she fucking _missed_ him. She knew it was selfish of her, but she still felt so alone.

But she felt a little lighter when she remembered telling him that she had wanted to take his hand. The pain and torment in his eyes had disappeared for a moment, giving way to shock and awe. It allowed the mask of Kylo Ren to fall, letting her see the Ben Solo she always believed in.

She had been so tempted to touch him when he looked at her like that. Completely vulnerable and like she was the only thing in the galaxy. She'd wanted to touch his face, his hair, his hand...she'd wanted to hold him, to embrace him, hell, she had even been tempted to just kiss him.

Stars, she missed him _so fucking much. _But she couldn't think about him now. She was tense enough already. And the massive armada of Star Destroyers did not help ease her nerves. But she steadied on.

As she made her way forward, her surroundings were getting darker and darker the deeper she made into Exegol. It felt like the ceiling was going to collapse on her at any moment. Rey was beginning to feel claustrophobic, even though she had spent most of her life in crowded places, scavenging ships, living in an AT-AT, and walking through the engines of downed Star Destroyers. But this felt different. The air felt oppressive as if it would like nothing more than to tighten its chokehold around her to suffocate her body and crush her spirit.

Rey stepped onto the platform that began to lower as soon as she was standing on it. The stone ledge lowered into the depths and caverns of Exegol. The flashes of lightning provided enough light for her to catch fleeting glimpses of machinery, large cracks in the ancient stone, and giant statues that were taller than a Star Destroyer. The hallway was surrounded by identical, foreboding, stone statues staring coldly down at her. It was as if they were judging her fate and had come to a displeasing conclusion.

She knew instinctively that they were memorials of Sith Lords who had come before. Rey hated that she knew that, she hated that the cold that shrouded this place felt familiar as if it had been hovering over her from the day she was born.

Rey craned her neck back to look around her. She suddenly felt very small, and she realized just how insignificant and tiny she was compared to the sheer gargantuan of this place. It was ancient, but she could sense the power that lingered here.

Gusts of dry wind whipped pieces of her hair free and they hung loosely around her face. Her palms felt clammy as she slowly walked through the hall.

Lightning screeched and she flinched as the galley was briefly illuminated by pale blue light, charged with electricity. The smell of ozone rang fresh in the air.

A glint of metal caught the corner of her vision. Some sort of machinery or mechanisms. Rey turned her head and squinted at the machinery beside her. She saw lab tables, rusted and abandoned equipment, old withered husks that looked suspiciously like bodies. Cloning technology, So that's how the Emperor had survived.

Lightning flashed and she caught a glimpse of torsos floating in an eerie yellow liquid. They were all identical to that of...Snoke! Rey flinched and recoiled from the sight, her stomach dropped and her mouth went dry.

Snoke had just been another pawn in the Emperor's game. Rey clenched her jaw tightly, a habit that she had picked up from Kylo Ren from whenever he was frustrated. The muscles in his jaw would flinch and tighten and her own body mimicked that now.

Rey was tired of being used. She was tired of being a pawn in someone else's game. She was angry, so she used that to strengthen herself. She curled her hands into fists and swiftly twisted her body away from the mechanisms.

She turned to the side to see two colossal walls of stone in front of her. There was a slim opening between them that led into a narrow corridor. Rey took a draught of the dry air and stepped inside, illuminated by the screeching flashes of lightning.

* * *

The pathway was barely 6 feet wide, and the walls seemed to stretch upward forever with no end in sight. She could see the light at the top, but somehow that made it crueler. To be able to see freedom, but knowing that she would never be able to reach it.

The lightning screeched and crackled above her as she made her way down the corridor. When she emerged from the pathway, the corridor led to an enormous amphitheater that stretched on for miles and miles. It was as big as a hollowed-out mountain, and Rey could only gape at the sheer scale of it all.

Something shadowy caught her eye though, and she turned her head and her eyes widened. She hurried forward slightly to confirm what she was seeing. Her blood ran cold and she could feel a chill run up her arms and through her spine all the way down to her stomach.

A massive, black dais that carried a hauntingly familiar vision. It was a chair roughly carved of obsidian, with spikes curving around and in towards itself. Like a halo of thorns, or claws of darkness threatening to completely envelop whoever sat on it.

A throne… The throne she had seen in her visions…

The throne of the Sith.

Lightning flashed, briefly illuminating the silhouette of the chair and Rey remembered the vision of her sitting atop it, along with Kylo Ren… Rey swallowed hard when she thought of Ben. But she was soon distracted by something else.

There was an eerily soft, constant chanting coming from behind her. She slowly turned around and saw thousands of hooded figures in the stands. Faceless apostles, worshippers. Sith cultists. Zealously awaiting the return of the Sith.

Their chanting created a rumble that grew in intensity and volume as she stared at the stands. It got to the point where it was almost painfully loud when suddenly, they stopped altogether. A horrible, screeching, grating clash of lighting reverberated throughout the amphitheater as if demanding its silence.

A pregnant moment of silence hung suspended in the air for a moment. Then, a low, chilling, and hauntingly familiar voice broke the silence.

"Long have I waited…"

Rey froze, her whole body felt paralyzed. She recognized this voice from every nightmare she had ever had. From her darkest fears, the doubting whispers that had haunted her on Jakku. Rey even recognized it from one more place.

She and Ben had been connected many times throughout their relationship, and it often happened while they were sleeping. Their dreams often mixed with each other. Rey remembered the chilling screams of Ben's nightmares mixed with hers, but this voice was the constant source of doubt and self-loathing that Ben carried with him all the time. The voice that manipulated him and fed him false lies throughout his childhood, and the voice that had continued to hold him captive in his adulthood. The same voice was calling to her now.

The voice was deep and slow, almost leisurely as if it had all the time in the galaxy but it resounded through the amphitheater with the force of a thousand blaster bolts.

Rey forced herself to move her body to turn around. She forced herself to look up and a robed figure materialized in her line of sight. It was connected to a strange mechanism that kept it suspended above the ground. Her grip on her lightsaber tightened when she saw his face.

It was hideous, monstrous, rotting away like a corpse. The skin was wrinkled, drooping, and decaying, barely clinging to his skeletal form. His eyes were milky white but red-rimmed and hollowed out. His mouth and lips were darkened with dried blood and decay only added to his repulsiveness. One of his hands was half-rotted away, leaving bone and rotting flesh visible. The cracked, pale, and disintegrating skin was split open as if it had been stretched over the body too many times.

It was merely a shell of what this creature used to be. A pale imitation of his days of power. It was the Emperor himself, Emperor Palpatine, Darth Sidious, her grandfather. His spirit was trapped inside the decaying, artificial form, his power too devastating to contain inside the rotting corpse.

Rey stared in horror at the monstrosity before her. Palpatine's face stretched into a grotesque smile as he continued.

"For my grandchild to come home." A smug triumphant expression crossed his face and Rey flinched. This creature, that called himself her family, radiated pure evil, darkness oozing out of its essence.

Even though Rey wanted nothing more than to put as much distance between her and this creature as possible, her feet twitched, wanting to move forward. There was something strangely and unnervingly compelling about him. She couldn't look away, and she hated herself for it.

Palpatine's face contorted in a grotesque sneer.

"I never wanted you dead," he said, his rotting lips pulling back into a triumphant smile, showing black, rotted teeth. "I wanted you here," he said, and then his voice lowered. "_Empress Palpatine._" His deformed hand gestured towards the throne, and Rey felt a wave of fear and panic wash over her.

Everything in her was revolted by that idea, but her body was straining to move forward. And her mind began whispering promises, promises of power, of control.

"You _will _take the throne," Palpatine assured her as the machine that held his body approached. "It is your birthright to rule, here. It is in your blood. _Our _blood." He sneered and the Sith acolytes chattered excitedly.

Rey wanted nothing more than to curl up into a fetal position and just hide, just to get away from everything, to run. But she forced air into her lungs and steeled herself.

"I haven't come to join the Sith, I've come to end them," she said, forcing her voice to remain steady.

Palpatine scoffed. "As a Jedi," he said, his voice dripping with contempt.

"Yes," she said quickly.

The corpse of her grandfather smiled.

"No. Your hatred. Your anger. You want to kill me," he said smugly. "Good...that is what _I _want." Rey looked at him in confusion. "Kill me, and my spirit will pass into you." Rey's eyes widened in horror and Palpatine smiled cruelly. "As all the Sith live in me. _You _will be Empress. _We _will be one."

The Sith acolytes cheered and the roar of the crowd filled the amphitheater. Rey's chest suddenly felt tight, so tight that she couldn't get air into her lungs. Her limbs were frozen to the spot, she couldn't breathe. Her eyes were white with fear and her entire body was trembling. Dread flooded her mind and it felt like her limbs were filled with lead. She was trapped. Where the hell did she go from here?

Rey was on the verge of panic, but she had nowhere to go. Nowhere to hide. All that remained were thousands of zealous Sith acolytes and her rotting corpse of a grandfather, who also happened to be the most evil person in the galaxy. She didn't know what to do.

Rey was completely and utterly alone.

* * *

Ben Solo came out of hyperspace into Exegol in the middle of hellfire.

"Shit!" he swore as a TIE fighter zoomed past him. He gritted his teeth as an X-wing swooped by, nearly clipping the edge of his wing.

Ben sensed a presence as another X-wing flew overhead, expertly spinning past a group of TIEs. It had an unusual paint job, a mixture of orange, grey, and blue.

_Dameron, _Ben realized. The pilot that had started this all. He supposed that oddly, if not for Dameron and his kriffing droid, he never would've met Rey. Ben almost snorted at that thought before cursing again as an explosion, too close for his liking, reminded him that he was in the middle of a shootout.

He forced the ship down into a rough and shaky descent as the old ship fought him. It was barely holding together as it was. Ben looked at the massive fleet of Star Destroyers and his eyes widened at the sheer enormity of firepower. They were monstrous and huge and very intimidating and they radiated pure power. Luckily, they didn't pay attention to one random, out-dated TIE fighter. They were focused on the Resistance ships.

Once the entryway was in sight, Ben flinched at the overwhelming darkness pouring from this place. It tapped into his deepest fears, his insecurities, his resentments, and his anger, but he was done being manipulated. He pushed the intruding thoughts out of his head and remained focused.

All he had to do was to get to Rey. What would happen afterward? He had no idea. He had thrown his lightsaber in the ocean, all he had was a blaster. But he knew that nothing would stop him from reaching her.

He lost focus for a moment and swore when he realized he had gotten too close to a Destroyer. He regained control and set himself back on course.

Suddenly, Ben thought of his father and imagined him saying something like, "_I don't know. Fly casual!" _The corner of Ben's lips lifted ever so slightly, and he realized that he was thinking of his father, and it didn't hurt so much anymore. That overwhelming guilt that had tortured him for so long was lifted, and he felt like he could breathe.

Han Solo was his past, but Rey was his light. And there was nothing in the galaxy that would stop him from reaching her.

* * *

**Author's Note: Hello, everyone! I'm SO SO sorry about the long delay. I got super busy and school just started back up again, and I didn't have a chance to sit down and actually write. I still don't know if this is any good, haha. Again, I'm SO sorry that I made you wait so long, even though I promised I wasn't going to be another month, lmao. A huge thank you to everyone who reads this story, who leaves comments, who favorites and/or follows this story! I'm so thankful for all of you, and you guys keep me motivated :) I hope you enjoy this chapter! I'm not going to promise or even approximate when the next chapter is going to be up though, haha. It seems like those aren't very reliable. But...I think I can make it up to everyone in some way. I may or may not be posting a oneshot after this goes up to make up for the lack of content. Ok, enough of me rambling, I hope you enjoyed the chapter!**

**Oops, I forgot to add this when I originally posted this. Are people interested in seeing a "prequel" of sorts to Force Bonds? It would basically be the Reylo scenes from The Force Awakens since this story begins during The Last Jedi. It would be the same format here just different scenes. Idk if anyone is interested, but if you guys are, let me know!**


	27. A Dyad in the Force

**A Dyad in the Force**

Just when Rey thought things couldn't get any worse, the Emperor opened his mouth again to speak.

"The time has come," he declared, his voice thundering through the hall.

Ethereal chanting from thousands of Sith acolytes reverberated through the hall as they simultaneously fell to their knees. Lightning screeched erratically against the walls, briefly illuminating the amphitheater.

The language was one Rey had never heard, but she didn't need to understand it to know there was a dreadful meaning behind it. The voices sent shivers down her spine and her hair stood on end.

Rey's eyes were wide with fear as her gaze flitted around wildly. She could feel a rising sense of panic and her body was trembling. Her fight or flight instincts were screaming at her to run. But she made herself hold her ground. She had to.

Rey whirled around when Palpatine spoke again.

"With your hatred, you will take my life," his rotting lips were pulled back into a triumphant sneer. "And you will ascend. Just as I did when I killed my master, Darth Plagueis." His sneer showed oozing, grey gums, and rotted teeth. "Now. Take your saber, and strike me down." He continued, delighting in her discomfort. "It is your destiny."

Rey shook her head. She was done with people telling her what her fate was. _SHE_ was the one who got to decide that. Not anyone else. Not Luke, not Palpatine, not even her friends. She was her own person. She was Rey. Just Rey.

She almost laughed bitterly before she spoke.

"All you want is for me to hate, but I _won't_. Not even you." Despite her attempts to remain calm, she could hear the harshness and the bitterness behind her words. She tried to tell herself she wasn't angry but it wasn't showing.

Her grandfather sneered in disgust.

"Weak. Like your parents."

Rey shook her head again, knowing he was baiting her. She raised her chin defiantly.

"My parents were strong. They saved me from _you_."

The Emperor leered mockingly before saying, "Your master, Luke Skywalker, was saved by his father. The only family you have here, is _me_."

His corpse advanced closer to her and Rey flinched, hating that what he said was true. The corpse stopped a few feet away from her, close enough where she could smell the rotting flesh.

The Emperor smiled lifted his gaze above, and a thunderous _boom_ shook the cavern. Rey turned around, looking upward to see the ceiling opening. The sound of stone grating against stone shook the entire room as they opened to reveal the battle above.

There were large silhouettes of Star Destroyers, Resistance ships darting in and out, but they seemed like gnats in comparison to the enormous firepower of the Final Order. Explosions lit up the furious sky which threw down bolts of lightning at random. Rey reached into the Force and flinched violently when she felt each and every death as their life winked out of existence. Her friends were dying.

Her vision blurred with tears as she inhaled shakily watching the sky above.

"They don't have long. No one is coming to help them," the Emperor said. "And you _are_ the one who led them here." A final taunt to seal Rey's despair.

He was right. She knew the Emperor was manipulating her, but it wasn't entirely without truth. It was _her_ that had led them to Exegol. And now they were paying the price for it. The Resistance was hopelessly outnumbered, outgunned, out of time. People were dying, and it was her fault.

"Strike me down, take the throne! Reign over the new empire and the fleet will be yours. Only _you_ have the power to save them," the Emperor's voice lowered before taunting her one last time. "Refuse, and your new family _dies_."

* * *

Ben Solo finally landed his ship beside the old Rebellion X-wing. He couldn't help but pause to stare at the 2 ships. Old enemies, side by side.

A familiar tingle at the base of his skull called his attention, that familiar awareness… Rey! She could feel him. He felt her confusion, then her relief, her joy, but only for a moment. The connection between them was cut off abruptly, and he could feel nothing of her.

Something was wrong.

Ben didn't hesitate for a moment to sprint towards the monolith. Armed with nothing but a blaster, he ran to the opening, and with no hesitation whatsoever, he launched himself into the chasm.

He caught himself on one of the massive chains hanging from the ceiling, landing heavily. It knocked the wind out of him and he took a moment to wince at his, now likely bruised, ribs.

"Ow," he said, grimacing. It was maybe the first time in years since he had let himself feel pain. Without drawing hatred from it. He let himself feel.

He glanced down over his shoulder. The floor was so far below him that he couldn't see it in the shadows. It would take too long to climb down. It was probably too far for him to jump down safely. Probably.

The only thing that mattered was getting to Rey.

_Ah, what the hell_, he thought. Ben Solo called on the Force, and let go.

* * *

Rey wanted to collapse. Finn was up there, Poe too. Rose, Kaydel, and everyone in the Resistance were up there, dying. Because of her.

Tears spilled down her cheeks. Then she thought about it. _Empress_. Would it really be so bad? Would it be worth it? To save her friends? To bring peace? The whole galaxy would have no choice but to be saved. She could have the power to make real change. Maybe this was the only way.

Rey stared up into the sky, watching the battle agonized.

"Very well," Palpatine said. "Finish them."

"No! Wait!" the words were out of her mouth before she'd even realized she'd spoken them. "Wait…"

She froze as she recognized a tingle at the base of her skull. A presence of light, even amidst the evil, rage, terror, and darkness infused within this place. She reached out, searching, and then...there!

She quickly shielded her thoughts and filled her head with thoughts of surrender, hopelessness, and defeat. Resignation to her fate.

She turned to face her grandfather and nodded helplessly.

His expression morphed into one of triumph.

"Good," he said. "Good."

* * *

"The ritual begins!" the Emperor declared. The acolytes responded with a loud, ceremonial chant. The mechanism holding his body began to lower the shell of her grandfather towards her. "She will strike me down, and pledge herself as a Sith."

Rey glanced around anxiously, waiting, daring herself to hope that what she had felt earlier was real.

* * *

A red blaster bolt took a red guard down. Ben ran about the corner when another bolt streaked nearby. Without looking, he aimed and pulled the trigger, shooting the guard behind him.

There was a time where he would have enjoyed this, the intensity and rage of a battle. But he was calm, blasting the robed figures easily. He had 1 goal, 1 all-consuming desire: **help Rey**.

He emerged from the corridor and had his blaster ready, his momentum causing him to slide a little bit. He started running again but stopped short when he saw 3 shadows coming towards them. The dust cleared and he saw 3 familiar figures. The Knights of Ren.

Vicrul with his scythe, Kiruk with his blaster, oh, there was Ushar with his staff. His Knights of Ren. He turned to see Trudgen, Cardo, and Ap'lek.

For a split second, Ben thought they were there to help him. But no, he could feel the waves of hate and rage roiling off of them. They belonged to the Emperor. Ben scoffed inwardly, _of course, they have_.

Another betrayal. The men that he'd considered his comrades, his brothers, were now circling him like predators stalking their prey.

Ben grimaced inwardly. The odds were not great. He could take 2, maybe 3 of them at once, but he didn't stand a chance against all 6 with nothing but a blaster. He'd trained with these men, fought with them. They could even touch the Force in some small way.

Shit, maybe he shouldn't have thrown his lightsaber into the ocean. The odds of him winning this fight were very much against him, but Ben smiled slightly when another line from his father came to mind: _Never tell me the odds._

* * *

"She will draw her weapon," the Emperor announced.

Rey forced herself to remain calm as she unhooked Luke's lightsaber and ignited it, the blue blade illuminating the ground.

"She will come to me," he continued, the crowd chanting in the background.

Nearly against her will, Rey stepped forward, glancing around nervously. It was as if she no longer had control of her body. She shut her eyes for a moment to try to calm down and focused on that bright spot in her mind.

* * *

Ben called on the Force to push Kiruk out of the way and dodged a blow from Vicrul. He turned to face Ushar but was struck in the face with his staff. Before he could recover, he received another blow on the other side of his face before being hit again, knocking his head backward.

Without giving him any time to recover, Ben was winded by a blow to his abdomen, falling to his knees and gasping for air. He glared viciously at his attackers but was struck in the back of the skull from behind, knocking him to the ground.

* * *

Rey stepped forward as if in a trance, breathing heavily.

"She will take her revenge!" Palpatine said.

Rey continued to step forward even though every part of her being was screaming at her to run. She swallowed hard. The saber felt heavy in her hand, but she tried desperately to keep her face expressionless.

* * *

Ben clambered to his feet and glared at the Knights, who in their arrogance had backed away to give him time to recover. They must have never really respected him to give him space now.

Breathing heavily, he glared at Trudgen and Ap'lek as they hefted their weapons.

* * *

"With a stroke of her saber, the Sith are reborn!" Palpatine boomed.

The power he exuded was intoxicating and Rey couldn't help but step forward. With trembling hands, she slowly raised her saber as if to prepare to strike.

"The Jedi are dead!" he spat and Rey was close enough to see his grotesque features clearly and she nearly wanted to scream at the horror of it.

She didn't want to, but the saber was in her hands at ready. No, she shouldn't, she couldn't! But her body was drunk on power.

Rey took a trembling breath and then stopped short…

A familiar awareness crept over her, the noise around her suddenly became muted, the thunder no more than a distant boom in the background. Suddenly, a figure that was not her grandfather came into view.

_Ben_.

Rey suddenly appeared in Ben's vision and he breathed a sigh of relief that she was alright so far.

Her lips parted in surprise and Rey wanted to cry with relief and happiness. Lightning flickered in and out, illuminating his face. A sheen of sweat covered his face, his hair was disheveled, he had a cut on his cheek and a split lip, but Rey had never seen anyone more beautiful.

His face relaxed when he saw Rey. She was bathed in blue light from her saber, and Ben couldn't help but think she looked angelic. She was..._happy_ to see him. She understood that he had abandoned Kylo Ren. That he had come back as Ben Solo.

Tears filled Rey's eyes as she looked at him. He had come back. He had come back for her in a way that no one had before. He'd come back for her. There was nothing that would benefit him to come here, he was risking his life, and yet here he was. Staring at her as if she was the most enchanting thing in the galaxy.

She shook with emotion as their gazes met and just for a moment, she let herself bask in their connection. It felt...good. Right. It was like coming home.

Ben also let himself feel the depth of their bond and was similarly stunned.

Together, they wasted a precious moment reveling in their connection. The way it should have been all along. A true dyad. Together. Whole.

The Emperor and Snoke had taken this from them. Circumstances had robbed them of this. A sense of belonging. A sense of _home_.

Rey no longer felt the need to step forward. She didn't feel the temptation to succumb to Palpatine's manipulations. Because _he_ was here.

Rey no longer felt like she was incomplete. Like that one piece of her heart had finally been filled. Rey wanted nothing more than to embrace him in that moment, but then she was reminded of the situation at hand.

She looked behind Ben and grew concerned when she saw his Knights surrounding him. He had no weapon. Concentrating, she projected an image at him and blinked, giving the slightest nod of her head.

He nodded back, holding her gaze. Rey took a deep breath and focused on Palpatine once again.

"DO IT!" Palpatine commanded. "MAKE THE SACRIFICE."

Inhaling deeply, Rey lowered the saber behind her back as if to ready herself for a killing blow. She reached for the Force. She reached for their connection. She reached for Ben. The effort made her shake and tears stung her eyes.

Then she felt something touch her hand. Something warm. A wonderful thrill went down her spine as Ben's fingers touched hers. He grasped the saber and Rey let go.

The Emperor closed his eyes in triumphant anticipation.

Rey raised her hand to reveal...nothing. Her weapon was gone.

There was dead silence in the air as Rey watched her grandfather's dawning horror in realization. He reached out and sensed another. He had allowed Rey and Ben to come together. He had not anticipated the strength of their connection.

Their bond, forged by mutual searching, shared grief and trauma, rage, fear, but also of compassion, empathy, hope, belonging, understanding, and dare she say it? Love. It was the one thing Palpatine had not foreseen.

* * *

Ben wrapped his hand around his family's lightsaber and it felt right. It belonged to him, it felt like an extension of his arm. He raised it slowly, relishing in the feel of it.

The Knights stepped backward, startled and confused.

Ben smirked and gave a small, nonchalant shrug. He imagined his father saying, _Surprise!_

He smirked at his former Knights, and then he raised his saber and attacked.

* * *

**Author's Note: Hello my dear readers! I am so so so so so so so sorry with how long it's taken me to update. I've been procrastinating but also school with COVID has been difficult. I DID promise that I'd get it done before the end of 2020, so here is my Christmas present to you all. I hope you enjoyed the chapter, and I hope it was worth the wait. I can't promise when the next chapter will be up, but I want to finish it before the end of winter break at least. Again, I am SO sorry for my long absence. I love and appreciate every single one of you. Thank you so much for reading and for being so patient with me. I hope you guys enjoyed! Reviews are always appreciated! Happy holidays and Merry Christmas!**


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